Soliciting to a Moron, yet another story Options

[The Travis]

So today I was chatting it up in IRC, enjoying my life when suddenly there was a knock at the door. Who could it be, I wondered. I backflipped away from the computer and towards the door. When I arrived, I looked through the peephole in the door. Ok, it wasn't a peephole, it was just a bullet hole in the door.

I was shocked to find that it was no one that I knew. Shocked. It was an elderly couple. "OH NOES!" I said, "They must be lost, or in grave danger. Also, they are quite old." I opened the door looked them straight in the eye and said, "Yo."

Old man- "Young man, this is not solicitation in any way. We are not trying to sell you anything. Only trying to enrich your life."

Me- "Enrich it how? Like with gold? Chocolate? Gold covered chocolate, and the chocolate is covering more gold? Explain yourself!"

Old man- "I come to help you young people, for you are heading down a road of destruction."

Me- "OHHHh like that song. "HIiiiiighway to the DANGER ZONE, DANGER ZONE!"

Old man- "What we offer is free bu-"

Me- "I'll take seven. And I'm not paying more than 20 a piece."

Old man- "What?"

Me- "..... your mother."

Old man- "This is what I was talking about. Young people today have no respect and will forever burn in the evil firey burning hellish hellfire."

Me- "Pyooo pyoooo."

Old man- "Son, you need to listen to me."

Me- "How can I listen to you if I... got your nose! Got your nose! OH! OOOOH! Got your nose."

Old man- "First of all you don't have my nose. Secondly, what does that have to doe with you listening to me?"

Me- "I'll tell you, but it's going to cost you SIXTEEN MILLION DOLLARS!"

Old man- "Go to hell."

I'm still not sure what he wanted, but he sure was neat.

[Astarael]

We rarely get any in our neighborhood. I'm far more annoyed by the televangelists blaring their guts out for hours with their own "everything sucks but Jesus" interpretations of the Bible. *sighs* I'm just glad that it's possible to change the channel.
But wafers taste foul. Have some yummy chocolate chip cookies around and people are putty in your hands.