Medication, What are your experiences? Options

[Mata]

I was talking with my girlfriend tonight about one of the newer members on the board and somehow the conversation got around to issues of medication and peoples' experiences with them. I've never taken any mood-drugs but I have many friends who have and I thought it might be useful if people shared their good and bad experiences of the various ones available. For example I have one friend at the moment who is taking prozac because she finds it works well for her and helps her keep a level head, whereas a family member took prozac and took himself off it after a month because he hated having the sensations of happiness when he knew that he didn't actually feel that way.

So, have you been/are you on medication? What has helped? What hasn't?

[Righteous]

You are really lucky you're not dead, then.

Regarding my drug use and its effects on my system, you are the only person who has ever said that.

But yeah, my liver doesn't work too well. I'm sh*t-faced drunk after three beers and quite stoned after four hits of regs (and I'm not sure if this has anything to do with anything, but I also piss frequently; according to the guys, I have a "bladder like an infant"). I will also say that it takes me a long time to come off of a high and by that I mean I can get high at ten PM and feel groggy the next morning.

My liver is monitored because of the lithium I take. Right now, it can function at a nominal level, however I am (and have been) forbidden to drink alcohol; that's the big thing and I'm glad I'm being more responsible than when I was nineteen. I don't know how long I'm going to last, but I'd like my liver to last just as long.

I'm sure drugs and alcohol were affecting the Depakote in some way, but at the time, they were the only things that helped keep me sane. The drugs and alcohol came way after the meds, not the other way around. I never needed to self-medicate while on lithium, which is one reason why I say it works better.

[Phyllis]

You are really lucky you're not dead, then.

Regarding my drug use and its effects on my system, you are the only person who has ever said that.

That's surprising. It's pretty basic psychopharmacology. I was referring more to the drinking than the drugs, however, since I don't recall you mentioning that you'd ever done any hard drugs. I only know roughly how much you drank based on having known you on the forums at that time and seeing how much you talked about it here. I might be overestimating it based on that.

How long had you been on the Depakote before you started drugs and alcohol? It takes about two to three weeks for the drugs to have their full effects, at an absolute minimum. If it was only between several weeks and a month, you could still have been feeling withdrawal symptoms from being taken off of the lithium so suddenly.

And in any case I'm sure the drug and alcohol use definitely made the problem worse. Recreational drugs seriously mess up the effects of antidepressants (talks of livers aside), because not only do they often affect the same neurotransmitters as antidepressants...they also cause a kind of depression themselves. They cause a withdrawal feeling once the effect of the drug has worn off. With milder drugs it often amounts to just feeling depressed in comparison to the mild euphoria present when you take the drug. The exact term is escaping me at the moment (and I can't be bothered to find my Fundamentals of Learning textbook), but it's a big part of what makes drug addiction so difficult to beat. For every high point induced by drugs, there is a corresponding low point once their effects wear off. So yeah...you may have taken them after getting on the Depakote, but I am almost certain that they just made things worse.

[Righteous]

How long had you been on the Depakote before you started drugs and alcohol?

Longer than I thought. Holy crap. I was on the suff for almost a year. I got on it in late April of 2002 and didn't smoke pot or drink heavily until mid to late March of 2003.

They cause a withdrawal feeling once the effect of the drug has worn off.  With milder drugs it often amounts to just feeling depressed in comparison to the mild euphoria present when you take the drug. [...] For every high point induced by drugs, there is a corresponding low point once their effects wear off.

When I was on Depakote along with the other drugs, I very rarely experienced a "low," as you put it. I recall one time snorting my nose raw and my "friend" kept telling me, "Dude, you're gonna crash so hard," and I never did. These days, I feel lows a lot more and my highs aren't as high. This is primarily why I smoke in moderation.

So yeah...you may have taken them after getting on the Depakote, but I am almost certain that they just made things worse.

Probably, but not all that much. I quit for about four months and my temperment really didn't change. I still cut and still lost my temper just as much. Similarly, my little cousin (who's sober) and my great uncle (who's sober) acted similarly and were both institutionalized. I have my theories about how drugs affected me, but I don't think it was all that radically. In any case, I'm on lithium and am more in control of my emotions and no longer need drugs to feel happy or alcohol to deal with my depression.