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> Ask Jonman Again, The Agony Uncle returneth!
Jonman
post Jun 3 2003, 11:36 PM
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Duck Hunter S Thompson
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Yup.

I'm back to solve life's little quandries, relationship dilemmas, and quieries about all manner of marsupials and molluscs.

Bring it on.


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elf
post Jun 3 2003, 11:37 PM
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disappear with the wandering wind
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Oi... Hm... this is... a weird question... nah I don't think I'll say it, it's too... dry.gif lol. Maybe later.


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Debaser
post Jun 3 2003, 11:40 PM
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Steadily spiralling into the abyss
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/me wonders if this counts as a question...well, it's a question, but...meh, i'll just get on with it...

dear jonman,

are the aquabats REALLY better than the pixies, or is a certain person i know just talking crap?

sincerely,
die hard pixies fan with a wrench

p.s. REALLY?


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Jonman
post Jun 3 2003, 11:44 PM
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Dear Die Hard,

I'm certainly the wrong person to ask. All you crazy kids with your new fangled music. Back in my day, it were all tin whistles and washboards. Well, not quite. Actually, it's all whoops and bleeps and abstract tinkly noises.

However, on the basis of the names alone, then aquabats win on account of scoring higher in a game of Scrabble ™


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Smallsam
post Jun 3 2003, 11:49 PM
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Dear Jonman:

Recently I cant seem to stop crying. Everything seems to be going wrong.
Im failing a lot of my classes, and Im constantly tired. I feel cold and utterly alone even when surrounded by people who I know love me. I cry myself to sleep, and I have an insane amount of catch up work to do to keep my parents from disowning me when they see my report card. There arnt anywhere near enough hours in the day. I need some time to just sit and sob, but I cant, and I dont have time to see friends, one ofthe few things that brighten my days. I have an unexpressable fear of the future and even of my upcoming summer break. Im terrified of change, and I have nothing to look forward to but more and more of the same heart wrenching failures for the rest of my existance. I know I seem overly pessimistic, but this is how I feel right now, and no matter what I do, I cant seem to shake it.

Please help. Its hard to type when youre crying so hard you cant see the keys.

~Smallsam unsure.gif
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LoLo
post Jun 4 2003, 12:05 AM
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Dear Jonman,

I asked you a question in the original thread did I miss the answer?

-LoLo


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 12:17 AM
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Duck Hunter S Thompson
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QUOTE (Smallsam @ Jun 4 2003, 12:49 AM)
Dear Jonman:

Recently I cant seem to stop crying. Everything seems to be going wrong.
Im failing a lot of my classes, and Im constantly tired. I feel cold and utterly alone even when surrounded by people who I know love me. I cry myself to sleep, and I have an insane amount of catch up work to do to keep my parents from disowning me when they see my report card. There arnt anywhere near enough hours in the day. I need some time to just sit and sob, but I cant, and I dont have time to see friends, one ofthe few things that brighten my days. I have an unexpressable fear of the future and even of my upcoming summer break. Im terrified of change, and I have nothing to look forward to but more and more of the same heart wrenching failures for the rest of my existance. I know I seem overly pessimistic, but this is how I feel right now, and no matter what I do, I cant seem to shake it.

Please help. Its hard to type when youre crying so hard you cant see the keys.

~Smallsam unsure.gif

Dear Sam,

With my totally zilch knowledge of anything resembling phsychology or that kind of stuff, it sounds to me like you're proper depressed. Have you been to see a doctor or mentioned how you're feeling to your parents or friends or anyone? My advice is to not keep it to yourself, and get some help. My ex-grirlfriend sufferred from depression, and she got a lot better once she'd seen someone about it, and started having it treated. Sufferring alone is not good.

If nothing else, make an appointment to see your local doctor, and be honest with him/her. If you don't want to get your parents involved, your doctor should keep it confidential between you and him/her.

hope that helps,
Jonman.


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LoLo
post Jun 4 2003, 12:18 AM
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Dear Jonman,

How do they get the buttered popcorn jelly bellys to taste like buttered popcorn........and you can ignore my last post I'm more interested in this.

-LoLo


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MistressAlti
post Jun 4 2003, 12:20 AM
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ever-hopeful since 2003
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Dear Jonman,

What is the meaning of life?

signed, Me.
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LoLo
post Jun 4 2003, 12:21 AM
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ps.......I missed you jonman and am glad you are back.......oh and youre girlfriend is really nice.


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 12:30 AM
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Duck Hunter S Thompson
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QUOTE (LoLo @ Jun 4 2003, 01:05 AM)
Dear Jonman,

I asked you a question in the original thread did I miss the answer?

-LoLo

No, you didn't. That thread was just getting too unwieldy, so I've made a new one.....

But here's your answer

*************************************************************
Dear Jonman,

I wrote this in Super K's relationship thread but I have yet to get a response and well you're always so with it that I want your advice as well.

There's this guy who has been my friend for years. I like him a lot, and well all we ever will be is friends and I know this. Anytime I get into a relationship or date a guy, or consider dating a guy I compare him to this friend that I have. Now none of them work out and none of them are going to meet up to being like this guy because this guy is an individual and thats why I like him so much. Is it bad that I compare everyone to him?

Sincerely,
Can't live with men but can't live without them
*************************************************************

No, it's not necessarily a bad thing. You obviously admire a number of things about your friend, and it's perfectly normal for you to want a potential boyfriend to have some of those same qualities. If anything, I'd say it's better to have high expectations for potential partners to avoid ending up 'making-do' - something I strongly recommend no-one do. At the end of the day, if the guys you've dated in the past don't measure up to your expectations, then it's pretty clear that they weren't 'The One'. There's the inevitable downside of having high expectations of course, in that they're more rarely met, but when they are met, then you're onto a winner.

Don't worry about 'never-finding-the-right-man'. Enjoy life for the moment, as moping about waiting for him is a waste of your current time. He'll turn up at some point, usually precisely when you're NOT looking

hope that helps,
Jonman


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 12:32 AM
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Duck Hunter S Thompson
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QUOTE (LoLo @ Jun 4 2003, 01:18 AM)
Dear Jonman,

How do they get the buttered popcorn jelly bellys to taste like buttered popcorn........and you can ignore my last post I'm more interested in this.

-LoLo

Too late....

It's simple anyway, you just plant buttered-popcorn-jelly-bean-bushes, water twice daily for the entire spring, then pick the harvest.


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 12:35 AM
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QUOTE (MistressAlti @ Jun 4 2003, 01:20 AM)
Dear Jonman,

What is the meaning of life?

signed, Me.

Hello me.

There ain't one. In days of yore, when men and women were as hairy as each other, the meaning of life was to shag as much as possible and ensure the continuation of the species. However, a few thousand years of civilisation has slung that out of the window, and now there is no meaning of life. I suggest not worrying about it and ensuring that you and your loved ones have as much fun as possible.

Works for me.


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 12:36 AM
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QUOTE (LoLo @ Jun 4 2003, 01:21 AM)
ps.......I missed you jonman and am glad you are back.......oh and youre girlfriend is really nice.

Thanks,

and I know! That's why she's me girlfriend! biggrin.gif


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craziness
post Jun 4 2003, 12:42 AM
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dearest monjan,
my parents basicly think that communication with people you dont know in real life is evil. they have no idea im on a forum, they dont even know what a forum is, but they are starting to figure out that i dont only IM my school and camp friends online. [duhhhhhhhhhhh] anyways, they are getting all paranoid and they think i am going to get stalked down, so i think im going to have to kind of get a life so that they dont suspect anything of me. but im scared. and im just realizing that my whole life is kinda just blah. i mean, i dont fit in with the kids my own age nor can i stand them, and all of my older friends are going to high school next year, and everything is so profanitied up. i dont know what to do with myself, and im trying to get a life, but i dont think im going to like it so much. the way i see it, im basicly stuck here for another 5 years! what should i do?


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 12:48 AM
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QUOTE (craziness @ Jun 4 2003, 01:42 AM)
dearest monjan,
my parents basicly think that communication with people you dont know in real life is evil. they have no idea im on a forum, they dont even know what a forum is, but they are starting to figure out that i dont only IM my school and camp friends online. [duhhhhhhhhhhh] anyways, they are getting all paranoid and they think i am going to get stalked down, so i think im going to have to kind of get a life so that they dont suspect anything of me. but im scared. and im just realizing that my whole life is kinda just blah. i mean, i dont fit in with the kids my own age nor can i stand them, and all of my older friends are going to high school next year, and everything is so profanitied up. i dont know what to do with myself, and im trying to get a life, but i dont think im going to like it so much. the way i see it, im basicly stuck here for another 5 years! what should i do?

OK Crazi,

I guess that convincing your parents that there's nothing sinister about online chums is pretty much impossible. That's pretty much the case with people who aren't actively online. They just see it as weird.

Hows about my stock answer of joining a local club that does some kind of activity that you fancy having a go at, I dunno, SCUBA, or canoeing or karate or amateur dramatics or something. Not only do you get to try something fun, but chances are you'll make some new friends through that avenue. The trick is finding something you fancy doing.....

Not great advice, but there you go.


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CovertYawn
post Jun 4 2003, 12:48 AM
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Ding-dong-doddley-Dear Jonman.
I've been on a bit of a downer recently. Last friday one of our dogs died, now, at the risk of sounding like a mean old bastich I have to say that it wasn't the fact that the dog had died that upset me so much, it was the way in which the dog died. (Just for the record her name was Fly, which is a long story in itself, suffice to say that no-one from my family named her) The poor thing drowned, a combination of arthritic legs and a small pond led to this untimely demise. So now I just feel, well, I feel Meh. Can you reccomentd anything to pick me up?

Yours.
**Sigh**


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Pikasyuu
post Jun 4 2003, 01:10 AM
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Dear Jonman --
7up or Sprite?

-- So bored syuu


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 01:36 AM
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QUOTE (CovertYawn @ Jun 4 2003, 01:48 AM)
Ding-dong-doddley-Dear Jonman.
I've been on a bit of a downer recently. Last friday one of our dogs died, now, at the risk of sounding like a mean old bastich I have to say that it wasn't the fact that the dog had died that upset me so much, it was the way in which the dog died. (Just for the record her name was Fly, which is a long story in itself, suffice to say that no-one from my family named her) The poor thing drowned, a combination of arthritic legs and a small pond led to this untimely demise. So now I just feel, well, I feel Meh. Can you reccomentd anything to pick me up?

Yours.
**Sigh**

Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong to you too, Mr. Yawn.

m'afraid I can't recommend anything that'll help the pain of losing a loved pet. If it were me, immersing myself in some lovely lush semi-melancholy music through a hefty pair of cans would help, but each to their own. Far be it from me to recommend going out with your friends and getting utterly bladdered, but that may help too.

Jonman.


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 01:46 AM
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QUOTE (syuu @ Jun 4 2003, 02:10 AM)
Dear Jonman --
7up or Sprite?

-- So bored syuu

Diet Sierra Mist

tongue.gif


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Pikasyuu
post Jun 4 2003, 01:51 AM
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QUOTE (Jonman @ Jun 3 2003, 06:46 PM)
QUOTE (syuu @ Jun 4 2003, 02:10 AM)
Dear Jonman --
7up or Sprite?

-- So bored syuu

Diet Sierra Mist

tongue.gif

Oi. - smacks 'er forhead - And it doesn't give you a headache?


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Jonman
post Jun 4 2003, 02:01 AM
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QUOTE (syuu @ Jun 4 2003, 02:51 AM)
QUOTE (Jonman @ Jun 3 2003, 06:46 PM)
QUOTE (syuu @ Jun 4 2003, 02:10 AM)
Dear Jonman --
7up or Sprite?

-- So bored syuu

Diet Sierra Mist

tongue.gif

Oi. - smacks 'er forhead - And it doesn't give you a headache?

*looks confused*

smacking your forehead or Diet Sierra Mist?


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Pikasyuu
post Jun 4 2003, 02:04 AM
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suggestive cupcake
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QUOTE (Jonman @ Jun 3 2003, 07:01 PM)
QUOTE (syuu @ Jun 4 2003, 02:51 AM)
QUOTE (Jonman @ Jun 3 2003, 06:46 PM)
QUOTE (syuu @ Jun 4 2003, 02:10 AM)
Dear Jonman --
7up or Sprite?

-- So bored syuu

Diet Sierra Mist

tongue.gif

Oi. - smacks 'er forhead - And it doesn't give you a headache?

*looks confused*

smacking your forehead or Diet Sierra Mist?

My forhead, originally, but I would not hesitate to smack a diet Sierra Mist. That stuffs comes from the devil! As well as the Pepsi cola company. Hm.


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i'm like oh kimosabe,
your body is my hobby






the official 'you bitch' count: a whole lot
last updated 11/05
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cheese is funny
post Jun 4 2003, 02:09 AM
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QUOTE (Jonman @ Jun 4 2003, 12:44 AM)
Dear Die Hard,

I'm certainly the wrong person to ask. All you crazy kids with your new fangled music. Back in my day, it were all tin whistles and washboards. Well, not quite. Actually, it's all whoops and bleeps and abstract tinkly noises.

However, on the basis of the names alone, then aquabats win on account of scoring higher in a game of Scrabble

LMAO!!!!


hi jonman!! woo!!! WB!! weee!!

<hugs jonman and runs away>


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Jaq
post Jun 4 2003, 03:02 AM
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Took this grammar!
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Is it wrong to do stuff? What about things? Where's my advice thread? Everybody's got a baby kangaroo but only the ignorant call the aformentioned creature a baby kangaroo. And where' *my* joey? Why do Australians have such...interesting names for their flora and fauna? Have you ever said platypus out loud just for the sake of hearing it? Am I cool? Am I crazy? My mom says you're not crazy if you talk out loud to yourself, you're only crazy if you answer yourself. That leads me to being crazy. Hello crazy, here I am. I'm really really really rambling, but you know what? I don't care! I don't even really expect an answer to my question(s) If you don't know what to say you can just nod and smile. I'll take that as a valid answer. That's what I do. Oh, I've got one more question, if a guy throws dough at you, does that mean he likes you? Please say no.

*mumbles incoherently for a few more minutes before hitting the 'add reply' button*

p.s. isn't Christian contemporary sucky?

p.p.s. if it' so sucky, why do I have it on my computer? I'm not even christian.


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