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> Unwelcomeness, Don't read this because you'll hate me
WeeJ
post Jun 16 2003, 02:43 PM
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i'm sorry to sound so very pissy but I feel very unwelcome within this forum now. As I've said in a previous post, I really enjoy Mata's animations and I find the forum peeps really friendly. I was taken in by Hinsley and she showed me the ropes and I've pm'ed with a few people and generally made friends. I don't come to this forum everyday and I haven't been a member that long but I feel like a few people in this forum has generalised a wee bit too much. I should imagine that everyone here has spammed at some time or another but from what I've read of peoples rants and raves, people think that a spam is a thread that isn't the length of the bible.
Anyway, in closing, I believe ppl should chill the hell out and if they choose to leave, then thats there gig. Myselff, I like the people here so I intend on sticking around but if I've offended anyone, then please tell me to get bent.


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ravein
post Jun 16 2003, 03:14 PM
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Weej, I hate you feel that way... that truly sucks..the last thing people want is for folks to feel unwelcome.
I have always felt this forum has been about the free exchange of ideas... when nonsense gets in the way of that exchange it defeats the purpose of the forum. When people write things just to see there name in type, there is no exchange of knowledge, opinion, ideas, etc.. there is no artistic creation of thought..just hapless banter. While there is nothing wrong with hapless banter, by all means it keeps threads alive and breathing.. it keeps the conversation going.. but it can be to much of a good thing. Take for instance, I make a post that I pour my heart into... something that I feel passionate about.. something that has the potential to enlighten someone..maybe change a view..or maybe a life... I spend a good 20 min of my life typing it up.. and I make my post and it is buried within minutes underneath threads about meaningless polls, how someone likes moldy bread, which is better, green grass or yellow grass.. then to add insult to injury.. someone comes along and types that they don't have time to read your post they are just spamming.
This is the type of thing that leads to frustration. My grandmother used to say think before you speak... I think that if we thought before we typed none of this would have become a issue. Hopefully with the creation of the new subject areas this will no longer be a problem.


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WeeJ
post Jun 16 2003, 03:33 PM
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Some good points made there but Mata has had a faff and given the forum some differnt groups.
What i was trying to point out was that the unwelcomeness feels as if it all stems from people being annoyed that people want to come to a forum for light hearted chat. Although I do agree its important to discuss issues such as bisexuality, crime within the UK and other such pap, many people don't want that or can't deal with that. I love to broaden my mind and listen to what ppl have to say and yes, random spam can be annoying but what I am pointing out is that its a silly reason to leave.


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ravein
post Jun 16 2003, 03:44 PM
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I agree with you.. spam alone is a stupid reason to leave... if it was just people spamming that would be one thing.. and there is nothing wrong with light hearted chat...god knows we all need it... I think the problem falls with the people who are no longer engaging in light hearted chat, and have moved on to dribble of the mouth. And once again it is a time and place thing..

me saying...
crackers r good
in a spam chat room is perfectly fine

but me saying
crackers r good
in a room about abuse is completely uncalled for

I think if our responses resemble our surroundings and everyone respects each other this forum will have a long and happy life.


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Proud Cronie since Feb 26, 2003
"When women act like women, they are accused of being inferior. When women act like human beings, they are accused of behaving like men." —Simone de Beauvoir
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. -Anais Nin
No matter that patriotism is too often the refuge of scoundrels. Dissent, rebellion, and all-around hell-raising remain the true duty of patriots. -Barbara Ehrenreich

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hinsley
post Jun 16 2003, 03:45 PM
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yes i agree, spam is a stoopid reason to leave, especially now with this new set up.
i personally will never elave unless i get loads of abuse off of lots of different people.....




and crackers r not good.


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WeeJ
post Jun 16 2003, 03:53 PM
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To be honest, I think a change of attitude is called for...maybe we should sit in a circle and smoke a bit...lol
with the new changes in place, maybe people will chill out a bit. I just think people making a big public stand about how much of a chore it is to come here seems an odd thing to do. If you don't like it anymore, don't come here. It seems crazy to get upset so much. Maybe we should sway as well as smoke lots rofl!!!


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 04:01 PM
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I think there are other issues not just spamming that are leading to people wanting to leave. I am not going to say I speak for everyone or anyone really but this is the sense that I get.

When I first got here along with other people who came on early, we talked on the forums all the time and had things to talk about. It wasn't all serious threads either like happen to be around lately. The thing is that being here this long we've watched the way the forum changes as it grows. Many people seem to be feeling that this sense of coming on here to have fun and to post is lost. The spamming is just kind of the icing on the cake. There's this sense that the topics don't give much chance to even get into a conversation. It does become really hard to respond to one line responses, or just things that seem like inside jokes. Then theres what Ravein said. You post something and put thought into it and really want people to read it, but people can't be bothered to read or respond to it because it's longer than a two line response. Makes it hard to have fun and enjoy posting when the only way to get a response is to say something silly like, "today I oranged" I dunno.

Anyways I'm sorry if you feel unwelcomed WeeJ. It's getting kind of hard to get to know people at least for myself. I've felt kind of alienated here for awhile, but I'm hoping for a change.


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ravein
post Jun 16 2003, 04:03 PM
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well people are running on alot of emotion.. they have put a lot into this place.. it is like fixing up a old house and then getting new roommates... the first week is fine then you forget to do the dishes..they next thing you know all hell breaks loose.. wink.gif
just give it time and remember all of they above and we will achive a harmony about this place again. smile.gif

*im such a hippy*


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"When women act like women, they are accused of being inferior. When women act like human beings, they are accused of behaving like men." —Simone de Beauvoir
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. -Anais Nin
No matter that patriotism is too often the refuge of scoundrels. Dissent, rebellion, and all-around hell-raising remain the true duty of patriots. -Barbara Ehrenreich

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WeeJ
post Jun 16 2003, 04:14 PM
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anyway, don't leave LoLo or I'll beat you with a stick


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 04:15 PM
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QUOTE (WeeJ @ Jun 16 2003, 09:14 AM)
anyway, don't leave LoLo or I'll beat you with a stick

wouldn't be the first time that someone did that....shock lol.

like I said I was thinking bout leaving, but I'm kind of waiting it out and seeing how things go.


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WeeJ
post Jun 16 2003, 04:21 PM
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Don't leave because of Spammers and cliques. Spamming exists whatever forum you're in and people are naturally gonna gravitate towards certain people..Don't make me threaten you with the stick again... rolleyes.gif


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 04:26 PM
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QUOTE (WeeJ @ Jun 16 2003, 09:21 AM)
Don't leave because of Spammers and cliques. Spamming exists whatever forum you're in and people are naturally gonna gravitate towards certain people..Don't make me threaten you with the stick again... rolleyes.gif

in the venting thread I said I was thinking about leaving and I think that people are focusing on that. Believe me if I do leave I'm not going to make a big announcement about it just kind of disappear. As for now like I've said I'm sitting it out and seeing how things go. Things are cyclicle. People get upset and leave, new group comes in, later people get upset and leave, new people come in. Right now I have a lot friends on here as well as away from here that I've brought here and I don't know that I'm prepared to leave them along with all the friends I've made on here. If I do get the job I interviewed for though which I do think there is a good chance I did or will, I won't be on as much cause I'll have something to do. lol


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Mata
post Jun 16 2003, 05:32 PM
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I know what you mean WeeJ, we all want to be able to have a bit of fun sometimes but at other times we want to talk about things that matter to us.

To start off with, when the forum wasn't really really busy, it was possible to do this all in the one section. These days it's just possible. It's quicker to type a silly post than a serious one so anyone wanting to start a serious discussion about something that troubles them can get quickly frustrated...

Anyway, now there are several places where once there was one. It's the nature of identity that complexity leads to fragmentation and so this forum has just gone multi-faceted.

If you want to chat and be silly then there's the Daft section. Daft is not only a great word but something I hold close to my heart.

There is also now the serious Issues section so that if there is something you need to get off of your chest then you can post there and people will know to give you a serious answer.

If you fancy a chat about your day and to generally keep up with the folks on the forum there's the Daily Life section.

Then there's the bit to chat about stuff you've seen, read or listened to.

I think I've got it all covered and I hope you grow to like the new setup. You can still post everything you used to but now there are places for different types of posts.

A good tip, if you haven't noticed, is that there is a box at the bottom of the page to jump between forums without going out to the front then coming back in again.


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hinsley
post Jun 16 2003, 05:36 PM
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QUOTE (Mata @ Jun 16 2003, 06:32 PM)
Anyway, now there are several places where once there was one. It's the nature of identity that complexity leads to fragmentation and so this forum has just gone multi-faceted.

twas a god idea to do that too and it really is a whole lot better.
and that paragraph is amazing.


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NummyNums
post Jun 16 2003, 07:51 PM
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Holey Great Mother of God ive been cloned!!!
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this about as long as a bible.. so its not spam....wink.gif LUV YAH WEEEEEEEEJ


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spuglet
post Jun 16 2003, 08:24 PM
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weej, you are my new favourite person on here. your first two posts...my sentiments exactly.

marry me?


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Queenie
post Jun 16 2003, 08:29 PM
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YAY!!! Garfield my cute little honey bun!!
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WeeJ has a boyfriend but ill inform her that ud like to marry her, she may want an open relationship!!?


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spuglet
post Jun 16 2003, 08:45 PM
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thanks queenie! i shall take this time to inform you that i am also a female!

( is this now spam? wow, theres a first for everything)


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Queenie
post Jun 16 2003, 08:48 PM
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YAY!!! Garfield my cute little honey bun!!
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yeah kinda guessed when i saw in the love thingy!!
comment still stays tho!!
i'm gunna stop doin exclamation marks now coz i get shouted at for doin to many dry.gif


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WeeJ
post Jun 16 2003, 08:49 PM
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/me runs around in circles....my boyfriend's pretty ok with your proposal on two conditions...

a) you're a bird
b) you're a bird

(and thanks mata..a point i was trying to get across was that you had set a bunch of changes in place to stop people whinging..long live Mata...)


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Pikasyuu
post Jun 16 2003, 08:52 PM
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QUOTE (WeeJ @ Jun 16 2003, 07:43 AM)
i'm sorry to sound so very pissy but I feel very unwelcome within this forum now. As I've said in a previous post, I really enjoy Mata's animations and I find the forum peeps really friendly. I was taken in by Hinsley and she showed me the ropes and I've pm'ed with a few people and generally made friends. I don't come to this forum everyday and I haven't been a member that long but I feel like a few people in this forum has generalised a wee bit too much. I should imagine that everyone here has spammed at some time or another but from what I've read of peoples rants and raves, people think that a spam is a thread that isn't the length of the bible.
Anyway, in closing, I believe ppl should chill the hell out and if they choose to leave, then thats there gig. Myselff, I like the people here so I intend on sticking around but if I've offended anyone, then please tell me to get bent.

Terribly sorry to hear you feel that way. But " a few bits of spam " are not why people are up and out. It's a small part of this forum's cracking down the centre. Thankfully Mata has rearranged everything, and hopefully that will fix the problem, though I know many people are still feeling what's been known as "forum burnout". I'm sure it doesn't seem like much to you, but this is obviously a very widespread viewpoint, and people are very upset about a once very simple, close forum becoming large and overwhelming, and of course covered in spam. I don't know how many times I can repeat myself. I was sure I'd made a couple of posts explaining why people were upset. Maybe you feel unwelcome because the general feeling in this forum at this point in time is rather negative. Between whatever cliques you make out of this, between spammers and old people, there's a general tension that's unsettling the virtual air heavily. It's a big problem, people are upset, so nobody's purposely trying to make you feel unwelcome. You're not in the least. But understand what a ruckus everything's in at the moment, and please don't spam this thread. You know who you are. That's just disrespectful of the new order of things. We can't help the forum if people don't pitch in and do their part. If you want to preserve it and create the atmosphere people loved, then please put a bit of a halt to it for now at least.


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spuglet
post Jun 16 2003, 09:02 PM
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but if people are so bothered that so many new people are joining, thats their problem not the new peoples. if this forum is as good as people say it is (was?) then they should be happy so many people want to use it. this is like people not liking bands anymore because theyve gone big.
granted theres a time and place for spam but i really dont think theres a need to make such a big issue out of it that now every time someone wants to make a new post, they have to think about whether its spam or not spam, long enough or too long, relevant or just a tiny bit off topic.

and i think some people (not myself) may now purposely spam just to make a point. and that will be because of people taking this whole damn thing way too far


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Queenie
post Jun 16 2003, 09:04 PM
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YAY!!! Garfield my cute little honey bun!!
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QUOTE (WeeJ @ Jun 16 2003, 09:49 PM)
/me runs around in circles

WeeJ, doesn't it hurt your leg when u run round in circles?
I think the forum will get beta now due to Mata's changes.


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WeeJ
post Jun 16 2003, 09:05 PM
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Thank you Spuglet, exactly my point. And Syuu, defining people as 'old people and spammers' doesn't seem fair really.

And Spuglet, is that a rejection?


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Pikasyuu
post Jun 16 2003, 09:06 PM
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QUOTE (spuglet @ Jun 16 2003, 02:02 PM)
but if people are so bothered that so many new people are joining, thats their problem not the new peoples. if this forum is as good as people say it is (was?) then they should be happy so many people want to use it. this is like people not liking bands anymore because theyve gone big.
granted theres a time and place for spam but i really dont think theres a need to make such a big issue out of it that now every time someone wants to make a new post, they have to think about whether its spam or not spam, long enough or too long, relevant or just a tiny bit off topic.

and i think some people (not myself) may now purposely spam just to make a point. and that will be because of people taking this whole damn thing way too far

Right. Spam to make your point. See how much better it makes things. But hey, at least you'll have made your point, right?


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