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> Sorry If I've Been A Downer Lately
LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 05:43 PM
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I just wanted to apologize cause I have been a downer. If people hadn't noticed.

I can blame this on many things:

I've had a bout of depression. It's hard for a workaholic to not have a job, and that's what I am, an unemployed workaholic. I'm hoping this will be remedied soon. This is why I've thrown myself into stuff like the album to give myself something to do that seems like it has a purpose.

Schools out for summer. I don't know if I'll get to go back in the fall, it all depends on the money situation and this is bringing me down. I love school, I love learning, and since it's been out I've been bored with not having something to do that requires me leaving my house. School's another thing that gives me purpose.

My body is acting really funky lately. I can blame part of this on my mom seeing as she's going through menopause, and her periods acting weird which in turn makes mine act weird. My hormones keep spiking up and down and for the first time in 10 years I've had noticable PMS. Hell even my period has changed. I'm sure you really don't care to know this but I've always been on time, cept that month I was pregnant, and my periods lasted for 6 freaking days. This month I had PMS for two freaking weeks before hand and like the last 3 months my periods only 3 to 4 days long, not that I'm complaining at the length it's kind of nice to not have it be so long lol.

To top that off, I'm hardly hungry anymore. I only notice that I haven't been eating when I start feeling sick, because of my lovely hypoglycemia which makes me sick when my bloodsugar crashes from lack of food. The upside is I've lost about 10 lbs in the last two weeks from the lack of food. This could also be tied to the depression thing.

So I just wanted to make a formal apology if I've been too down lately. Sometimes it takes the form of crankiness and striking out subtly if not bluntly at people, which I hate when I do that, and sometimes it just happens that I get upset over trivial things. For example right now I'm very pissed at my neighbor cause he is filling up our green waste bin with his bush pruning stuff, and I'm trying to mow my lawn and have no where to put the clippings. To top that off the mower is a being a royal pain in the @ss and turns itself off every trip around the lawn only to come back on 3 minutes later.

Anyways I'm sorry, and I'm going to try and working on being the old silly LoLo, cause I know people don't really like dealing with me when I'm not happy.


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porcelainwarrior
post Jun 16 2003, 05:47 PM
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hi i dont know you too well yet but im sorry youve been depressed and feeling unwell ... as for me i think you should work on making yourself happy not being silly for the sake of others, i know id rather people were honest and ask for help than fake it

but like i said i dont really know you that well so if this is being presumptuous im sorry, i hope you're better soon though!


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MistressAlti
post Jun 16 2003, 05:49 PM
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It's okay, Lo... I still love you. We all have our off-times.

/me hugs Lo

You've always been there when I needed you. You've been a good friend to me. And like I'm so often-reminded, friendship isn't always about the good times.

If you need anything, let me know, okay?
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cheese is funny
post Jun 16 2003, 05:56 PM
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im sorry to hear this lo... as always, im here to cheer you up whenever possable..


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 06:07 PM
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thanks guys, I just hate when I get upset and treat people badly for no aparent reason, so I just wanted to apologize.


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Mata
post Jun 16 2003, 06:29 PM
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Aww, that's very sweet of you. There's been some stress around on the board lately so I have to admit that I hadn't really noticed you being out of character. I'm sorry to hear you've not been too good.

QUOTE
I've lost about 10 lbs in the last two weeks.
Eek. That's not very healthy! Please look after yourself. If you want something to do then how about cooking some really complicated meals.

1) It takes ages

2) you get hungry from all the yummy smells

3) your mum will appreciate it I'm sure

4) learning to cook well is a valuable thing in life.

Just a thought smile.gif *hugs*

I also recommend martial arts classes when people are bored!


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 06:35 PM
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QUOTE (Mata @ Jun 16 2003, 11:29 AM)
Aww, that's very sweet of you. There's been some stress around on the board lately so I have to admit that I hadn't really noticed you being out of character. I'm sorry to hear you've not been too good.

QUOTE
I've lost about 10 lbs in the last two weeks.
Eek. That's not very healthy! Please look after yourself. If you want something to do then how about cooking some really complicated meals.

1) It takes ages

2) you get hungry from all the yummy smells

3) your mum will appreciate it I'm sure

4) learning to cook well is a valuable thing in life.

Just a thought smile.gif *hugs*

I also recommend martial arts classes when people are bored!

It is scary but not eating is something like I said I don't notice until I get too hungry.

yes cooking does make me hungry and the good smells are great, but I have to go to the store to get stuff and currently I am without the mums atm card and don't have money for myself to use on groceries. lol

She does appreciate it when I cook, because there is nothing nicer than coming home from a long day at work and finding a nice meal prepared and ready to eat.

I am a very good cook so learning to cook is something I don't have to do. lol. I've been cooking since I was 7 years old and trained by two master chefs, my mom and my grandma. Not to sound cocky, but when they teach me their "special" recipes I tend to take over making them and make them better than they do. lol

Martial arts is a good idea, but requires money which I don't have at the moment, so I think I may just dust off my body by Jake machine and go back to working out regularly. I hear working out makes people happy too cause of the endorphins it stirs up in ones brain.


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Mata
post Jun 16 2003, 06:41 PM
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Yep, exercise can really cheer you up from all the chemicals it pumps around your body, not to mention the smug glow that you get afterwards!

Sounds like you're a great chef! I know who's place to drop by for dinner if I ever get to your neck of the woods wink.gif


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 06:44 PM
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Holy hell I just got offered a job. It's only part time but it's a job. I don't know if they will take me on though cause I was straight with them and told them that I might be getting a job with Wal Mart soon, but nothing is set with them. I should tell you guys my problems more often. lol


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cheese is funny
post Jun 16 2003, 06:46 PM
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why not work two jobs? you said your a workaholic... laugh.gif


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oobunnie
post Jun 16 2003, 06:49 PM
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QUOTE (LoLo @ Jun 16 2003, 07:35 PM)
I am a very good cook so learning to cook is something I don't have to do. lol. I've been cooking since I was 7 years old and trained by two master chefs, my mom and my grandma. Not to sound cocky, but when they teach me their "special" recipes I tend to take over making them and make them better than they do. lol

hmm that makes me want to stop by and see you. I failed all my Home Ec classes (3 of em in total, How am i supposed to know a clove of garlic means one peice and not the whole thing, besides dont people like there ceaser salad garlicly anyways lol) I used to cook KD, but now that they have the instant stuff whats the point.

well my suggesion might be a little crazy but when i get stressed i start getting up around 6 am and go jogging. being as you live in Cali i'm sure you have a nice veiw to run by. I love it because at 6 am its still nice and cool out plus there just enough light to see all beautiful stuff around you. i find it very relaxing


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 06:54 PM
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QUOTE (cheese is funny @ Jun 16 2003, 11:46 AM)
why not work two jobs? you said your a workaholic... laugh.gif

LOL if I get the walmart job it will probably be full time. I probably shouldn't have even said anything about it though now that I think about it cause they only interviewed me it's not like they offered me a job. I would work two jobs but doing the school thing and the work thing is like two jobs in itself.

The lady said she would like to hire me, but she thinks I'm too over qualified and might leave her soon if I do take the job cause someone else will snatch me right up.


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 06:56 PM
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They just called back and I start on Wed.


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MistressAlti
post Jun 16 2003, 07:00 PM
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YAY! LO'S EMPLOYED!

/me gives Lo BIG HUG
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porcelainwarrior
post Jun 16 2003, 07:00 PM
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yay! go lolo!

*sings the congratulations song


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LoLo
post Jun 16 2003, 07:02 PM
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Best part is, this place is just a little shop that sells antique furniture and they let you wear jeans and t-shirts to work. lol


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cheese is funny
post Jun 16 2003, 07:02 PM
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yay!! great job lolo!! congradulations!!!


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craziness
post Jun 16 2003, 10:18 PM
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YAY LOLO!!!!!!!!!!!
im sorry your RL has been crappyful, but i am sooooooooooo happy that you have gotten a job!
and ya know what? you are overqualified!


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reaper
post Jun 16 2003, 11:21 PM
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I am sorry to hear that you have been feeling depressed about things. I know how it feels to be depressed about not having work but maybe bnow thta you have a jobn that will all change atleast I hope. I am always here to talk to, even though my time is limited now but I am always here to lend a hellping hand to you lolo and to everyone else who needs someone to talk to. I hope things get better for yea. Your a cool person and you have always been nice to me, never otherwise. Your a great person Lolo, dont ever change


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TigerLily013
post Jun 17 2003, 12:19 AM
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Well the main thing is you are doing better than before, and thats what counts. I am sorry you had to go through a downward spiral there for a while, I think it is true that we've all been there.

*hugs LoLo*


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MoonlightSavings...
post Jun 17 2003, 03:23 AM
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QUOTE (LoLo @ Jun 16 2003, 10:43 AM)
My body is acting really funky lately. I can blame part of this on my mom seeing as she's going through menopause, and her periods acting weird which in turn makes mine act weird.

Wow, I had never thought of that possibility before. I know that wimmin who live together or spend a lot of time together tend to have similar menstrual cycles after awhile, but I had never considered the effects of a menopausal womyn on a younger womyn before. That is really...weird and cool at the same time, hehe.

Also, CONGRATS on getting that job, LoLo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so happy for you!! I know how difficult a time you've been having with finding a job and now I'm so excited upon hearing this news, that you'd think that I'm the one that just got a job. Woooohoooooooo!!! biggrin.gif


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oxym0ronical
post Jun 17 2003, 06:02 AM
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First of all.. congrats on the job! I'm happy for ya.

Second of all.. I've been here throughout a lot of crap. I've seen you at some of your best times, and I've seen you at some of your worst. I may not always be online, but I am always here for you. You can always reach me if you need to. Even if you need to call collect, please do. Whatever happens, whatever goes on in your life, I'm still going to be here. You're like a sister to me, and that includes the good times and the bad times.

Third.. come cook me dinner tongue.gif
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