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> Manic Depression And Other Such Gah-ness, an explanation of my absence
porcelainwarrior
post Aug 3 2003, 11:37 AM
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Ok, I know we already have quite a few polls/threads etc on mental illness but I felt that I wasn't as honest about why i was away for a while as I should have been so here goes ...

So - my mother is manic depressive. She had her first major breakdown when i was 9 and my sisters and I went to live with my grandparents while she was in hospital ... she feels she was diagnosed too quickly in my grandparents attempt to hide the fact that our family life wasn't as perfect as they try to make out and has subsequently tried to wean herself off of lithium practically since she got to take us home alone even though this has led to two more hospitalisations and several close misses over the last seven years.

Asides from this time her last attempt to stop using medication was last year when she found out that I SH and stopped taking her medicine in an attempt to punish herself ... it wound up with me taking my sisters to my stepdads house and then dealing with her on my own (and I'm not going into that with anyone ever ok?) until the doctors arrivved.

Well basically the same thing happened again. She saw that I wasn't as "cured" or "happy" as I claimed to be and she began to drink heavily and stop taking her medication again ... this has been ongoing for about a month now and I (once again damn me) didn't realise what was going on til it was practically too late.

She's back on her medicine now and she seems alright but it was pretty f***ing scary for a while as now i'm over 16 and last Christmas (when things were still a little argh) she made me her legal guardian should anything like this happen again so it was pretty much my call what happened (also if she does get hospitalised again before my littlest sister turns 16 I'll take legal responsibility for both my mother and my siblings so that's damn terrifying too)

Anyways, here endeth the rant ... that's why I was away for so long (my computer did break in the middle of it all though) and if I disappear again that'll probably be why.


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CommieBastard
post Aug 3 2003, 11:47 AM
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Jeez, man, that is really tough. I sympathise. sad.gif


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leopold
post Aug 3 2003, 11:55 AM
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Oh, porce, that sounds really rough sad.gif

You take care, honey... *hugs*


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porcelainwarrior
post Aug 3 2003, 06:10 PM
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gah - i meant to put this in daily life ... move it if you want someone (too many mods to name now tongue.gif) (kk - will do! -leo)

and thankyou both </hugs> all shall be fine and dandy in the life of porce ... or i'll eat someone in rebellion


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And this great blue world of ours
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leopold
post Aug 3 2003, 06:12 PM
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Eeek! As long as ya dun eat me!! *hides*


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porcelainwarrior
post Aug 3 2003, 06:15 PM
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darn ... and to think you were my nummy victim of choice ...

ach well tongue.gif


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CrissiLove
post Aug 3 2003, 06:31 PM
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I'm really sorry you've had such a difficult time, Porcelain. sad.gif *Hugs*
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Sun Tsu
post Aug 3 2003, 07:00 PM
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It sounds horrible. Thanks for sharing and welcome back.
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kidvicious2punk
post Aug 3 2003, 07:32 PM
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/me huggles porce

im sorry sad.gif

my family has a history of mental illness..but i bet yours is worse


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porcelainwarrior
post Aug 3 2003, 07:37 PM
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no actually ... my family are wierd as hell and i bet psychologists would love to get their grubby little hands on us but (as far as i know) my mum is the first person to be diagnosed with anything

our family motto is "if we pretend its ok then it cant be that bad"

only in latin tongue.gif


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Little solace comes to those who grieve
When thoughts keep drifting
As walls keep shifting
And this great blue world of ours
Seems a
house of leaves
Go to the top of the page
 
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