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> Hate Men, hurting lots...hate them
the lil' pie...
post Nov 11 2003, 09:12 PM
Post #1


Don't you just love hot water bottles?
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can i have a wee rant? will anyone mind??

i split up with my boyfriend of over a year about 6 weeks ago, and since then so much has happened it's been stupid. i've had my ex before him telling me he loves still and my current ex mucking up my head completely. he got together with a girl about a week afterwards and seemed really happy, which made me sad. but, when i found out he still loved me i was still sad. i don't get myself.

i know we can't be together at the moment, as my parents would forbid it, i was so moody when i was with him. and all my friends would kill me. but i still love him and it's hurting us both to be apart, which makes it even harder.

the only thing that hurts more than that is the way he still acts in the same hurtful way, even though he doesn't realise it! he told me today he needed a shower cause he was meeting a cute girl for breakfast tomorrow, yet five minutes before he told me he loved me and would wait forever to be with me again. not that fact he said that, but the tone of voice he had and the way he wants me to get jealous and upset really gets to me.

and i can't stop loving him even though i want to sometimes, and it tears me apart because i can't be happy with or without him and i don't know what to do. and i know this is all unconnected and rantish and stupid but i'm getting soo down, i mean, i rang to ask why he wasn't online as he was the one that asked me to go on and he just went "oh, my computer won't work, and i was just on the phone to that girl from new look, she's ringing me back soon..." in a you'll stop her getting through kind of way, then added "i've been talking to her for 20 minutes already!"

i hate him, but i love him, and if i tell him he'll get so upset he hurts me, but if he won't change am i wasting my time??

*ARGH*

give me a knife....and i'll carve die rich into the chair sad.gif


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Mingtea
post Nov 11 2003, 09:18 PM
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Lanky Mofo
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Nothing anybody is going to say is goign to help, your love for him is a feeling that you feel, nobody else can change that.

It's a mild form of what's known as "being stubborn" it's ok I feel same thing right now.

Par Example: My ex.. of 1 year and a little bit is the most annoying self obsessed stupid irritiating cow ever. But i'm stil in love with her, and I hate that i feel that way... if she said she wanted me back i'd be back in a shot.

I guess all i'm really saying is I understand how you feel.. tbh from where i'm sitting it seems like the "I still love you" thing is just him trying to keep his options open.

V bad, v bad indeed

*hug and love*


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the lil' pie...
post Nov 11 2003, 09:20 PM
Post #3


Don't you just love hot water bottles?
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maybe...although i don't want to think that of him, it makes sense...hate it sad.gif

but thank you for understanding...*hug*

rare nice guy you must be.


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Mingtea
post Nov 11 2003, 09:21 PM
Post #4


Lanky Mofo
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You know how it is, nice guys finish last, hence my year of poo raining on me smile.gif

But I look at it in a light hearted manner... or i'd be back to square one again, perhaps some advice there.


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Fallen Element
post Nov 11 2003, 09:29 PM
Post #5


Obliterates Everything He Kisses
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want me to tie him up with scarves so you can beat/talk/rant/carve/bite/dance around him? im quite willing to do so for you my lil pie fairy! all you need to do is ask!

Fal xXx


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acidteardrop
post Nov 11 2003, 11:38 PM
Post #6


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im sorry. love is an odd thing, it has a tendency to make us really happy one moment, then is our deepest pain the next.

i hope things get better for you. but bear in mind (and i DO NOT intend this as slander, im merely advising) that he COULD be playing you when he says "i lvoe you"


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im now sextastically married to krys (magikeyes)! i love you so so so so soooooo much!///im engaged to liz(edward_lover)!///I LOVE YOU BOTH!!///I am Missy's slave! yay me!///Krys is my loving girlfriend...i love you infathomably with all my heart, mind, body, soul!///killersquirrel is my first noob ever ^_^///Trina(Spiffy) is me ickle sis! ^_^ /me wuvs trina///Shelly(werewolf) is my older sister! be nice! :P///I am engaged to VVes!///Mina(deaq) is me new n00bie! I LOVE YOU, MIAN!///i have three more n00bies; baldricks gherkinator. they are Jen, David, and Sebastian///Jen must be kept away from microwaves at all times. David must be kept near Jen permanently. Sebastian must not be fed peanuts...he prefers walnuts....
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the lil' pie...
post Nov 12 2003, 03:22 PM
Post #7


Don't you just love hot water bottles?
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bless you fal, yes please!

hmm...i don't know acid, he gets really upset when i tell him we should forget it or he can't love me, to the point of tears sometimes...i'm not sure i can believe that he'd put that on, i thought i knew him well enough to know he would mean it...but i guess i should look at it from a little less biased point of view maybe. sad.gif


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Pixelgoth
post Nov 12 2003, 03:35 PM
Post #8


Flaps and spins on the spot
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Hmmm, my tuppence worth? It sounds like you're both a little screwed up (in the nicest sense of the term) and need some time apart from each other to sort your heads out. I understand how you can hate and love someone at the same time.

You just need to ask yourself is he making you more miserable than happy? If the answer is yes then he really shouldn't be around you and you really should at least try and get over him.

I KNOW it isn't easy, no one ever said it would be, but it sounds like he is playing with you and that's not nice.


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Hyperion
post Nov 12 2003, 05:11 PM
Post #9


samazon
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man, love sucks.


I'm sorry... *huggies* I dunno, he doesn't sound like a real nice guy. But I say that about most every guy, maybe because it's true (except for like Judgy, Dayan, and Mata and the other guys on the forum) so... I agree. Take a break, try to have fun with your friends or something. When I'm down about my ex I go out and play pool and follow hot people around the mall with my best friend.

But... I wuv you!! *huggies again*


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TigerLily013
post Nov 12 2003, 06:04 PM
Post #10


~~Sanity Impaired since 1986~~
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Well I think he is one hell of an actor. First he says he loves you then talks bout other girls like they are his goddesses or something. Either he's a REALLY good actor, a REALLY dense guy or all of the above.

You really should discuss this with him. If he is offended, tell him how you feel...how much crap you are putting up with and if he doesn't stop...well avoid him or block him online at least so it can help.

All in all I think he is just messing arund with your head. Heck, if he can come to tears like that saying that he loves you then go on bout some other girl, he has some good acting skills. tongue.gif


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the lil' pie...
post Nov 12 2003, 08:43 PM
Post #11


Don't you just love hot water bottles?
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you all seem to think the same...maybe it's true. anyhow, i think i'm gonna take the advice of people probably older and/or wiser and confront him abou the whole issue, to see what he says, maybe disguising some ideas from here as my own to see what he does...if he is playing me for a fool though, he'll wish he hasn't mad.gif i'll pound on him...

dry.gif



sad.gif stupid bastard...well, only got till 10 to wait cause that's when he'll ring...i hate predictability dry.gif


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Pixelgoth
post Nov 13 2003, 01:05 PM
Post #12


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Well? How'd it go? You OK? unsure.gif


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Hope confidentally, do valiantly, wait patiently!
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Enjoy what you have and hope for what you lack
Thoughts become things, choose the good ones[/center]
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monkey_called_na...
post Nov 13 2003, 01:14 PM
Post #13


I'm an inefficient bear. Maul.
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um, i relly think hes just using you. like if no other girls want him he has you to fall back on, and hes making sure he has you by telling you he love you all the time...


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spiffilicious05
post Nov 13 2003, 01:40 PM
Post #14


Empowe(red)
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ohmy.gif omg lil pie fairy ive been going through the exact same thing the past couple of months, actually about one and a half, and it sucks i know... but i still love ya laugh.gif ::huggles lil pie fairy:: feel better hun


if you wanna talk just pm me, or im me, or ym me, or email me, or erhm...yeah


::huggles for lil pie fairy:::


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the lil' pie...
post Nov 14 2003, 01:44 PM
Post #15


Don't you just love hot water bottles?
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after yesterday narth, i reckon you're right!

well, i rang him to tell him what i felt and stuff, and he just started laying into me saying i couldn't just say it and let it be i had to explain it, when really i only went on cause i know he doesn't listen to me sad.gif then called me selfish, told me i should stop being inconsiderate and think about others before myself for once, and that if i wanted him so much (never told him that, just that i still felt for him...i didn't say i ever wanted to get back together) i should stop trying to drive him away!
just in a...a really arrogant way, like it was my fault, and he was all like "i put so much into this and you just always chuck it back in my face" and telling me all this stuff that made me feel like a large lump of excretion.

so i hung up on him. and cried a lot. but then went out to cadets to see my friends, had some fun and felt better(ish)...i hate him for doing this to me. i decided too that i'm not going to text him, ring him or accept calls from him anymore. maybe a bit extreme, but i need to do it to get him out of my life and be happy again unsure.gif

so yeah...that's how it went people.

and spiffi, i'm glad you understand, thank you, and the same applies to you, i'm here. and don' take any crap ok? *huggles*


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SHINY...

Freshers Flu is a buttmunch.
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acidteardrop
post Nov 14 2003, 09:16 PM
Post #16


Nobody Expects - THE SPANISH INQUISITION!
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i know its hard, fairy, but i think youve done the right thing. he has NO right to call you selfish or arrogant, and indeed hes the bloody selfish one if he has a girlfriend and wants you too. it is my honest beleif that he was just playing you, keeping you there as a backup in case things go wrong with his current gf he wanted someone he could bail and have you there. please dont take offense to that, im only inferring.

my thoughts are with you ::::huggles::::


--------------------
im now sextastically married to krys (magikeyes)! i love you so so so so soooooo much!///im engaged to liz(edward_lover)!///I LOVE YOU BOTH!!///I am Missy's slave! yay me!///Krys is my loving girlfriend...i love you infathomably with all my heart, mind, body, soul!///killersquirrel is my first noob ever ^_^///Trina(Spiffy) is me ickle sis! ^_^ /me wuvs trina///Shelly(werewolf) is my older sister! be nice! :P///I am engaged to VVes!///Mina(deaq) is me new n00bie! I LOVE YOU, MIAN!///i have three more n00bies; baldricks gherkinator. they are Jen, David, and Sebastian///Jen must be kept away from microwaves at all times. David must be kept near Jen permanently. Sebastian must not be fed peanuts...he prefers walnuts....
YAY FOR POLYGOMY! YAY FOR YOU ACTUALLY BEING BORED ENOUGH TO ENLARGE ALL OF THIS!

/\_/\ (\ _ /} i would cry but my tears have been stolen
(^.^ ) (='.'=) i would scream but my voice has been taken
(U U ) .(")_(") thus i write.
(''')(''')
kitty attributed to Tigerlily PM me if you are reading ths, i have something to tell you
BI PRIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
http://www.webpost.net/ac/acidteardrop/all...ebelongtous.JPG (sorry, that picture's way too big -Commie)
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monkey_called_na...
post Nov 15 2003, 11:25 AM
Post #17


I'm an inefficient bear. Maul.
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i know what its like because of josh, we went out for a little over a year and he proposed and everything and then one day i got on his computer and was on his sn and so girl imed me* that she was pregnat and was happy we* were together for the past four mounths.... *this all happened about 6 mounths ago)

*all ment to josh

and no he still is trying to keep me around in case they ever break up and i yell at him about it...


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prezgfish
post Nov 15 2003, 05:38 PM
Post #18


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I say kill the fool

but seriously you love him and he loves you but you him your friends and your family all know you shouldnt be together and perhaps you are better staying apart.

however you do obviously have deep feeling which are very hard to ignore.

my suggestion is that your damned either way at the moment and that you should pit you brain against your heart oin this one and ask which makes the better argument.
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the lil' pie...
post Nov 17 2003, 11:37 AM
Post #19


Don't you just love hot water bottles?
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i love you all *hugs*

prez, i took your advice and i decided that right now it wouldn't work. and, on a maybe good, maybe bad note, me and rich had a natter about it and re-agreed this together last night.
thanks to everyone for letting me go on and on and on about it, the support meant so much to me and just having people care helped a lot *more hugs*

i'm gonna make you all magic pie!

love char xxx


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SHINY...

Freshers Flu is a buttmunch.
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Mingtea
post Nov 17 2003, 07:43 PM
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Well hope it all works out for you etc.

Sounds like you made a good choice.

*hug*

(coor i'm starting to be too nice on these fora)


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Guest_Fandangohead676_*
post Nov 26 2003, 03:12 AM
Post #21





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Im sorry to any guys but as my father tells me "men are scum i should know im one of them"
and i find that to be true somethimes
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Fluffy
post Nov 27 2003, 01:08 AM
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I've, over the years, become dissapointed with the way males act (and I'm male myself). I'm one of the only guys I know at my school who doesn't think women are just sex toys, that appearances are all that matter, that violence is cool, that badness is cool, and all those things that the male stereotype has become. But for the most part, I agree with Fandango's father. There are a few good guys, but not many.


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Phyllis
post Nov 28 2003, 10:04 AM
Post #23


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QUOTE (Fluffy @ Nov 26 2003, 05:17 PM)
I've, over the years, become dissapointed with the way males act (and I'm male myself). I'm one of the only guys I know at my school who doesn't think women are just sex toys, that appearances are all that matter, that violence is cool, that badness is cool, and all those things that the male stereotype has become. But for the most part, I agree with Fandango's father. There are a few good guys, but not many.

I disagree strongly.

Some of the best people I've ever known have been men. And those I've known haven't been few and far between...they've been abundant.

Plus, I'm reluctant to stereotype any one group as "mostly bad." That's just...blegh.


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Silver Star Ange...
post Nov 28 2003, 08:42 PM
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I have almost the same problem. I broke up with my boyfriend a few months ago. I offered to be his friend but he said no. So I carried on with my life, but then he tells me that he still has feelings for me. We become friends again, but then all of a sudden he starts spreading rumors about my new crush/best boy friend and I going out. And he gets mad at me because I told a few of my friends that he went out with this girl, which he does. So he tells me that he never liked me and whatnot. And to this day he keeps talking about me and my new crush. He really needs a life.


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Nomad
post Nov 29 2003, 10:14 AM
Post #25


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Men are nice people. I am one, yet I have a great dislike for my own kind.

Firstly, he says he loves you, but, 5 minutes later, he says he is going out with another girl? One cannot share one's love, if he really loved you, he wouldn't even consider going out with another girl. Love is a singular bond, not measurable liquid that one can pour into many different places.

But you still say you love him. Is it love, or infatuation? Do you really believe that you will never love another man? My advice would be to find someone else, anyone else, and become fixated with them, and your feelings for the original guy will surely dissipate. There are many fish in the sea, and your relationship with this guy failed the first time, and he is using jealously to lure you. Perhaps he isn't the perfect man. I would grit my teeth and follow logic, rather than the hormonal urges of squidgy piece of meat we call 'the brain'.


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