whuy do i have to put up wity this **** double standard garbage. he allways wants to sit on that seat he allways gets that seat cos yopu to **** slack to deal with his stupid *******why do i gety blamed because i've given up i'm not sitting on that seat im on the stupid one with a bar in my back because you don't see fit to disaplineyour child and he for some reason needs my seat the one i'm sitting on it's not his that *****thinks it's ok to just walk in and demand that i get of his seat he hits me with a broom and you dop nothing he jumped on me and i have bruise the size of *****on my side but it's my fault because i'm on HIS seat he ripped a hole oin my favorite shirt and while i'm changing that little *****this its ok to throw a shoe at me great another red mark just see if i care but y6ou arent doing a damn thing are you because i sghould antciopate the ***** whim ofr my little brother.
i don't want to deal with thisanymore i'm stuck in this town because of you i don;'t want to be here.
im all alone i missmy friends and you took them away from me i don't want to hurt anymore i don't know what to do why cant you listen to a thing i say you won't stand up for me you want to criticise me for being differenmt just because the world can see that i dress like a freak . after all it doesn't matter that you sons a ******cos noone can that can they.
you **** why don't want to hear what i say you just want to nag me about not going to school well i can't go now can i you fryed my brain with your meds i cant even read properly now i cant do numbers are you satisfied i was going to into uni early and you'd rather **** anound with my life stop[ me leaving town say it's for my own good. it's for your good you stop blaming me for your problems you gave up the buisness you want to turn me into you and i'm not just let me be i cant stand you. i hate you go away.
if i had any money i'd go and curl up with a bottle of vodka but i don't cos yet again i spend it all on you. thoughtless selfish olny care about yopurself and what total strangers think opf you they dont care they arent looking. i am i think you should stop acting like i do nothing you saw how the whole p[lace fell apart when i stop doing all the things that you should go to hell i hope we both die

EDIT- Now I suggest you go and vent your spleen on the person who has annoyed you so much. I have better things to do with my Xmas than spend it editing posts from people who should know the rules by now.
Thank you.

Feel better now?

While I gather from the post that you're angry, frustrated, etc, please remember to watch the language. It's part of the forum rules/guidelines, and while language doesn't necessarily affect me, there are those it does affect. Just a friendly reminder, since there's no moderator online at the moment.

You know, if I could understand a word of that, I'd be a lot more likely to care.

Care to explain what happened? All I get is that some unruly person keeps taking your seat and threw things at you and got you angry enough to post a post with a month's worth of curse words in it.

i'm not angry about the seat it isn't mine. i'mpissed off with the fact that i wasn't doing anything and i get attacked by my rotten little brother and my mother gets pissy with me because i yelled when i was jumped on which is just proof that i start these things and i'm an attention seeking little snot.
i now have a giant bruise on my side a shoe shaped bruise on my leg and a swollen cheek. my mother however does nothing about this because somehow i invite this sort of thing.
you see if i react instantly i'm being atention seeking she won't do a thing if i yell because she hates that..........but if i dont react instantly if i move then she says i'm whining and that i'm not actually hurt.
can you blame me for swearing this sort of hing is intolerable just writing it down makes me want to cut someone

Aah, I completely understand now. My mom did the exact same thing when my sister and I were younger. You see, what it is is that some parents just aren't very good at parenting. They get sick of trying to do things the right way, so they decide to do things the shoddy, easy way. IE: letting the loudest get whatever they want in a pathetic bid for "peace and quiet". And nomatter what you do, you will always be the "wrong" one because you're the oldest and you're "supposed to know better".

Now, there's really no way to fix this without outside help. Parents never listen to their children. Seriously. If you really want to fix things, I'd try your school counselor. If you have one, that is. Tell him/her what's going on, show any bruises or scars, and ask if they could suggest some family counseling services. If you can't enlist outside help, you're pretty much screwed. I'd suggest taking up meditation. Be the rock; relaxed, calm, you do as you wish and you let it all slide off of you.

Although, if your mother happens to have a thing for Dr. Phil's advice, you might be able to make her see how she's screwing up through him. He's big on parents taking charge of their kids to keep them from turning into terrors.

Also, realize that if you fix your mom in regards to your brother, she will in all probability start being more strict with you....

i don't go to school. i was thrown out after sending 3 consecutive science teachers on stress leave.
another thing my mother does is nag which is unfair because naging doesn't work on my siblings just on me but i do what i'm suposed to do without being asked because i hate being naged so i'm stuck in an environment where my mother ends up poking holes in mt because she's so frustrated with my siblings.

like today we had to clean the bathroom and the computer room i did my jobs for both rooms and then washed up because it needed to be done. we were told what our jobs were at 9.30 and at 10.30 mine were done yet at 3 this after noon my mother had been naging for 4 hours because laura wouldn't just wipe down the bench in the bathroom and then take out the (her) plates and clear away her things in the computer room.
also we have a craft room which is where i do most of my sewing. i single handedly cleaned and organised the room. i sorted and then marked boxes with exactly what was inside them. and i like that for sewing but now my sister and brother on a semi daily basis go and pull down the boxes half unpack them and leave them in the middle of the floor. there is no way to deal with this because if asked to put tghings back they'll either have a tantrum(they're 10 and 13 for gods sake) or put things in the wrong boxes then put the boxes in the wrong places and still leave a pile of rubble in the idle of the room.

what pisses me off even more is that my mum can be reasonable for days at a time before acting like the neglegent headcase shes been for the last 36 hours which sugests it's within her abillitys to control she just doesn't

Well, this is what I did when my sister kept getting into my stuff and messing my things up. I locked them up. I bought several big tool boxes and several combination locks, gave my mother the combinations and spare keys so she could check and make sure I wasn't hiding drugs or anything, and locked up everything that my sister liked to screw with the most. By the time I moved out of my mother's house, my room had a locking doorknob, I had a toolbox in the bathroom with my bathroom stuff in it, I had another in the living room between the computer and the TV for my DVDs, tapes, and computer stuff, and I had several extras lying around for things I was working on that I couldn't work on in my room.

As for your mother picking at you for what your siblings are or aren't doing, like I said, be Zen. It really doesn't matter. Just relax, chill, listen to her whine and rant, then when she stops to take a breath remind her that you aren't the one she's mad at and that the only way she's going to get them to do their things is to nag at them instead of you.

i can't lock the craft room it doesn't even have a door handle i have to use a knife to get in and out

what's the age gap between your sister and you by the way. and did she stop getting into your stuff with age or did you have to move out before you could safely not hide things.
a few years back i had a locking box my brother has far too much time on his hands because he wacked the lock off with a hammer just to get at a box of matches and some blu tack

My sister is 2 years, 1 month, and 6 days younger than me. And no, she didn't stop getting into my stuff with time. In fact, my mother still emails me about my sister breaking into my room and taking my things, and she still mails me gigantic boxes of things my sister has taken and she's confiscated. And my sister is a senior in HS this year.....

Is the craft room yours? Or is it a general family room that your mum would get mad about if you locked it up? Because locking doorhandles can be quite cheap. I bought mine for $13.

As for your brother whacking locks off with a hammer, you can buy boxes with built-in locks. Just hope that he doesn't learn to pick locks. My grandparents bought my sister locked boxes when I bought my first one and I had to learn how just to retrieve my things.

i did clean the lounge room i onlt went out for an hour and kirk and laura filled it with camping stuff and paper mache it isn't my fault or my job i can't be forever following my sibklings around to stop them making mess and i can't do anything even more when you refuse to giveme the right to ask them to move their activity to somwhere else. how about me i've been turning the house upside down for 3 days trying to find the video remote because i can't play videos without it all because bloody kirk had a temper tantrum and broke it.
how can you criticeise my videos and forbid me from watching them when you or my sibling are around then sa i can't watch them at night.
i don't have a tv because kirk kicked my tv stand over you did say you'd replace it that week and now 3 years later i don't have a tv so i'm reduced to cleaning a whole room to find a remote to watch my videos in 30 minute chunks so i can't watch a new movie cos i half forget what happened at the begining by the time i've reached the end because you set down rules that make it takes a week to watch a movie.
damn you aren't angry with me you're angry with kirk for never cleaning up his own mess and sleeping in the lounge room on the only seat till 1 in the afternoon.
it's not fair he has a room to be in and he keeps it a pigsty.
i don't see why i should have to do the washing nobody but me does not even you and all my clothes are hand wash only. more frustrating is that if i wash the clothes i will have to hang them out and even when they dry neither kirk nor laura will bring them in and if i bring them in nobody will sort the for weeks untill i end up doing it cos i need the basket. and furthermore if i sort strait away then the clothes will not go to the apropriate rooms and if i take them to their rooms then they don't get put away they just get dumped on the floor unless i do every single part of the washing it either doesn't get done or it creates more work for me because i have to re-wash all the clothes that don't get sorted or put away and get dirty again.
i'm sure if you were to the one doing the job you'd see fit to make thoses little brats compleat the job wouldn't you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hmmm... Is there anywhere you could go for a week or two? It's summer down there, is there any sort of camp or youth center thing you can do for a while? Maybe camping with friends or somesuch? Because you're quite right, if you're not there your mother will most likely make your siblings do their things the way they're supposed to.

Do you get an allowance? Do you have your own room? And does it have a door, if you do? Because if you do, maybe I can help you figure out some more long-term things to do.

we don't have any of thoses camp type things to do in my town being that it only got a population of 23 thousand which drops to 18 thousand when the uni students go home for holidays.
i don't have any friends in town they've all gone off to go to T.A.F.E in the city in days gone by when this sort of thing got to me i'd go and stay with hugh but he now lives in canberra.
i get an allowance $8 au a week and my plans to get a job fell through.
yes i have my own room with a door and everything but it's not much of a place to hide when this stuff starts it doesn't lock and my siblings think that have the right to wander in and root around in whatever they please.
so what do you suggest


my god my spelling and typeing gets sloppy when i'm angry

Would your mom be opposed to you putting a lock on your door? I remember when I lived at home and I had no door even, I may not have had siblings, but my mother acted like one and would just walk in and go through my things so in a way I kinda understand, but if you can get a lock put on your door I will gladly purchse one for you.

Okay, first step will be to get a lock on your door. Locking doorknobs work wonders, believe me. You'll need to bring everything into your room that is outside of it for this part. I don't know your siblings personally, but if they're anything like my sister they'll start tearing apart anything you have left outside of it.

Don't get the cheapest locking doorknob. Get the next step up. The cheapest ones have flimsy metal that can be pulled apart with too much tugging.

Installing the doorknob should be fairly easy. But, might I suggest doing it while your family is out? Paying attention to directions, nomatter how easy they are, is hard to do when you have kids running around you, stealing parts, and a mother screaming bloody murder about this or that. If your mum and siblings don't normally go out and leave you alone, try faking sick some time when your whole family is supposed to be going out to do something. You might miss out for that, but having a secure place to keep your stuff is worth it.

Once you have your knob up and running, don't forget to either give your mum a key and convince her to keep it from your siblings or hide a key somewhere your mum knows about. Remember, you have to convince her that this isn't to hide something bad from her, but because you're a teenager and you need more privacy than your siblings are giving you. You aren't locking her OUT, you're locking your things IN. And also remember to never lock the door on your mother when she's yelling at you for something YOU'VE done, nomatter how tempting that may be. You have to take responsibility for your actions. If you use your room to keep from doing so, it will lead to bad things.

Next step will be to get your room organised. I know that this part is tiresome, but just think, your siblings will (hopefully) never get in to mess around with anything. If you have everything organised and clean it gives your mother less of a reason to barge in. Plus, you won't mind hiding out in a clean room as much as you will a messy one. Bring books, writing paper and utensils, crafts, anything you will need to keep yourself busy in there. Trust me, there's never a feeling so frustrating as running from siblings into a messy room where there's nothing to do.

Next step will be to start keeping a running tab of everything of yours that your siblings destroy. Try to remember how much it costs and write it down next to the name. Also write down when it happened and who did it. Show it to your mother every week. Don't BILL her for any of the things. Just grab her some time when you can, sit her down, pull out the list, and point out that your sibs need to learn to respect your property. This would also be a good time to point out any bruises or scratches that they've given you in the past while. Don't let her turn it into a fight. Be Zen. Maybe pretend that she's just a really bad movie you're watching. Listen to her, let her rant herself out, and when she's done go back to what you're saying. Trust me, you can't win anything by losing your temper yourself. It will only prove to her that you're juvenile. Come back here and rant if you need to. Why do this? Because if your mother has any sort of real spart of good parenting in her, she'll take your siblings to task for all this. Yell at them, time out, grounding, whatever she does will probably be more than she is doing right now, right? And if you're lucky, she may agree to replace some of the things, or to make them pay for them.

Next step will be to make your room your home. Forget the rest of the house, that's the domain of the yelling and screaming. You can't change that. But by setting it up so that you don't have to mess around with the rest of the house very often, you can get some peace and quiet. I'd suggest rummaging through thrift stores and garage sales to find things to make your room more comfortable. First off would be finding a new TV, I'd think. Your mother promised you a new one, if you find a cheap one and push hopefully she'll live up to her word. If not, forget about it and save up and buy it yourself. Finding something comfortable to sit on besides your bed should be second. Remember it doesn't have to be something big or stationary. There are blow-up chairs out there that are sooooo comfy. I had one when I had a small ammount of space. And, if you're having trouble getting everything to fit, if you measure everything and send the measurements to me, I might be able to help. I'm really good at fitting lots of things into tight space.

Do these things and afterwards we'll see what needs to be done. Don't forget to keep updated on here. Rant and scream if you need to. Raising a parent is hard work and it takes support and advice to do it well!

A very good point, I went through this a couple of years back and my mum let me have a lock, then I got myself into an argument with her one day and locked myself in my room. I left my key in the inside lock so she couldn't get in so she panicked and kicked the door down cause she thought I was hurting myself. Was'nt a good day. I then had to put up with having a curtain in my doorframe until we had a housefire 6months later and she got me a new door when she replaced the rest...

I hope what everyone has said so far helps you hun. It sounds like you really do need a space that is just yours were you can relax and unwind when everything outside gets hectic.

If you need any help working out how to store stuff away feel free to harass me. Whilst in my first year at uni one of my housemates was an extremely unpleasant bloke who had a definate issues with me, sometimes quite aggressive ones at that. Apart from using the cooker and bathroom I spent most of that year living in my room, it was quite big though. I could make toasties, hot drinks, I even managed to find a cheap fridge too, limiting the risk of running into him too often by doing my cooking whilst he was out! The second and third years the company was alot more pleasent so my room was often open but the ideal situation of communal tidying never really worked so I think with those combined I have an idea of your problem and my mind boggles! I wouldnt advise you go to the hermit like extremes I initially employed, it makes for a lonely life and can throw up more problems, but your own space you definately need!

My current situation has forced me to return home and although it sounds like your home like is significantly more explosive I still need my own space away from everyone else! With my room being only 6ft 3" by 9ft and my chosen career that of an artist who deals with large scale works both 2D and 3D I've had to be fairly creative with fitting things in to allow me to find the bed at night!
So if you have things you need to store particularly crafty bits and no ideas PM me Im sure something will present itself and anything is better than a heap on the floor! Too many pins and scalpel blades in my feet have taught me that one!

Good luck with it matey! x

Note* Moving this to the new Personal concerns forum.

Oh, and just so I don't forget to say this, always keep your keys on you. To your door, to locked boxes, to ANYTHING you don't want your siblings getting into. Keep them on a ribbon around your neck, a bracelet, something. And try your best to never take it off. Because if you don't keep your keys with you at all times, there's a good chance your sibs will snatch them and mess up all your stuff. And you also have a chance of locking yourself out. And trust me....that isn't fun at all.

With your mother having a set you don't have as much of a problem with locking yourself out. But if she hides them where you don't know where they are there's a chance of you getting locked out while your mum isn't there to let you in. So I'd ask her to put them somewhere where you know where they are. Besides, you can help her find a place to hide them where your sibs can't find them. I bet you know all sorts of places where they never look that your mum would never think of.