horizontally. i might be able to get away with a wheelchair.

cat poop on your new shoes?
-or-
dog poop on your new shoes?

Dog. For some reason.

Would you rather be chained to a lamp post for eternity,
OR
have a lamp post chained to you for eternity (difference is with this one you can move about, but it doesn't take much to get the lamp post to fall over and crush you)?

Cat poop. I've never seen it before, and so hope that it's not sloppy and sticky like dog poop.

Eternal geography lessons
-or-
Eternal history lessons

Edit: Bah. I forgot about this post for some while, damned geog essay and JimiJimi managed to post first. So I guess you can forget all about this post!

history I HATE MY GEOGRAPHY TEACHER
lamp post attached me me (that way it wont look my falt when people look at me)

drinking a pint of soya souse
-or-
drinking a pint of sushi dressing

Sushi dressing, soya sauce just has that evil factor about it....

Have baby pictures of you pinned all over the country
-or-
Have modern day pictures of you pinned all over the country

(people won't recognise you when you're a baby, but baby pictures are very embarrassing, no?)

Baby, because then people won't be going 'Ooh, it's that person who is all over the country but noone knows who he is or what he does'.

Would you rather be poked to continually post on Matazone without food until you starve,
OR
be fed but can never go on Matazone?

Life without Matazone would be.. . well... death. Or just living without a soul... Something along those lines. It's like a drug. So no food but matazone. Virtual food from the bar will feed me sufficiently.

Your girlfriend dating your dad
-or-
Your boyfriend dating your mum

(If you don't date one of the sexes then just imagine you do )

dad dating girlfriend the thought makes me cry.

going on a school trip personly with one of your most hated teachers
-or-
not have enough money to go and have to stay with the teacher at school
BARE IN MIND they make the choices on the holiday such as musiums about fungi etc...

No money.

Would you rather have the satisfaction of beating IATB to the post three times in one evening,
OR
Be beaten by IATB with a big stick.

second 1

Getting drunk and kissing someone ugly with everyone watching
-or-
being kissed by a drunk ugly person

When you said the second one^^, are you saying that I'm so weak that me hitting you with a big stick feels even better than beating me at posting? Or do you just enjoy me hitting you with a big stick?

Getting drunk and kissing, because then the experience is easy.

Being beaten to posting four times in an evening (I'm predicting this being the forth time)
-or-
Being eaten alive by sharks

Edit: This wasn't the forth time! Nyer!

I don't really care about being beaten to posting so yeah, that one

Farting in the presence of the Pope

OR

Farting in the presence of the Queen

oooh!oo! the shark 1!!!

yes i do enjoy being hit with sticks.

everyone forgeting your bithday
-or-
too many peole remembering your birthday

aw!

pope.

tart
-or-
pie

very random but i cant think of anyting

Pie.

Chicken,
OR
Steak?

Pies, that is...

steak/i/cant/put/any/spaces/or/enters/or/else/my/comp./dies!//would/you/rather:/wear/a/paper/bag/over/your/head/for/the/rest/of/your/life?/or/wear/cardboard/boxes/on/your/feet/for/the/rest/of/your/life?

feet i dont enjoy walking

New york
-or-
London?

New/york/would/you/rather/lick/a/frozen/telephone/pole/or/lick/your/mom?

telephone.... im not going to go near the other option....

hit with a wet sponge
or
hit with a wet flannal

Flannal. You may just get a satisfying whipcrack noise.

Would you rather be photographed just when you don't want to be (that includes when in the nude),
OR
be forced to photograph things you don't want to (that includes Anne Widdecombe in the nude)?

photograph/others/would/you/rather:/have/a/baby/or/have/50/hairs/pulled/out/of/your/head/every/day/for/the/rest/of/eternity/and/when/you/run/out/more/grows

Have a baby...

would you rather:
have only telemarketers call you every minute
OR
Have pop-ups cover your computer screen every time you log on?

telemarketers, you ccan put your phone on mute or neer answer it.
Would you rather:
Be happy the rest of your life
or
just watch yuor life go before your eyes like a tv show

be happy. I like a difference.

whould you rather:

A clown coming and killing you in the night
-or-
Everyone was clowns but they didn't hurt you

bare in mind IM TERRIFIED TO CLOWNS

I find clowns intimidating, but if one killed me in the night I wouldn't have to see him.

Would you rather be in a coma for 20 years,
OR
Everyone else be in a coma for 20 years?

Everyone else! MWA HA HA!!!

Would you rather:
have huge holes in your skin and have people poor hot wax in them and let it dry and then cover the holes back up
or
be raped...... lots of possibilities

be raped.


would you rather
have cold hands
or
cold feet

hands. No reason i just dont like cold feet...


fairs
-or-
theme parks

Theme parks. Less cheesy and naff.

Kill your best friend to save others,
OR
Kill yourself to save others

id kill my friends any day lol


hit constantly with a spade
-or-
being hit constantly with a sharp stick

Spade. It could be the death spade, and the person hitting you would undoubtedly get arrested.

Meh.

Would you rather have VHS cassettes for feet (This makes it slightly more difficult to walk, but not by much, and you need to use your feet to watch things on your VCR - if you don't watch things on VCR imagine you do),
OR
Have Betamax Cassettes for hands (You can't really watch these anymore unless you have a Betamax player, but then it's hard to pick things up)?

Mmmmmm this rased further questions on why my hands are square and my feet play movies when im not looking. I guess if I had to have the choice id have the feet.... no hands.... feet. Feet.

a bowling ball as a head ( making you wobble when you walked)
-or-
rubber gloves as hands (filled with eather water or air im not fussed)

Bowling ball! Woo!

Would you rather be slowly lowered down onto an operating helicopter rotor feet first (and the helicopter rotor is very sharp),
OR
Have the same treatment that Sean Connery recieved in Goldfinger (with the hilarious laser)?



If you haven't seen Goldfinger, a laser slowly approaches Connery's crotch.

i would have to say lazer.

what would you rather be?

frog
-or-
tadpole

Tadpole, then I experience both (but may be eaten by fish)

Would you rather be able to control everyone,
OR
Read thoughts?

conrol. Then I can have a bit of fun with people i don't like by making them wack their heads of doors etc.

sleep when ever you want (wont bw asked to get up)
-or-
be able to never get tired

Never get tired. Sounds like fun.

Accidentally catch a 25" frisbee in your mouth, and when it is removed you cheeks take on a 25" disc shape,
OR
Have a 15" frisbee lodged in your brain for the rest of your life (it hasn't affected your brain, but will if removed)?

i'd proberbly end up doing both but if i had a choice loged in brain so people can see how crap i am at catching.

eating 5,000 oreos
-or-
never eating another oreo again

Never eating another oreo, it wouldn't affect me as I've never tried one...

Be humiliated on TV (like tripping up or something embarrasing),
OR
Be shown doing something you didn't want people to see on TV (like being caught on CCTV shoving bricks through windows, and you can easily make out it's you)?

the second one making me look better on TV breaking peoples stuff and then everyone hating me and biting my legs. AND HOW COULD YOU HAVE NEVER TRIED AN OREO!! there so good mmmm... anyway yes.

munching on a stick with poo on it
-or-
eating a dry sponge (allready used to was dishes) and then a toylet brush?

Either way, you end up eating crap, so I'd say second, just incase the toilet brush hadn't been used.

Would you rather be really smart but talk totally incoherently (everyone just thinks you're dumb and you don't get the millions that you would if you could talk),
OR
Be really dumb but talk in a really annoying posh voice?

second one so people think im smart but im not.

Cake
-or-
muffin?

muffin

would you rather
never wear socks again
or never wear shoes again

never wear shoes. I cant wear shoes without socks it makes me sad.

life without TV
-or-
life without a computer

without tv cos I can find lots of whats on tv that I want on the internet.


would you rather
eat tea leaves
or gum leaves forever

Mmm... tea leaves...

Would you rather be sat down and forced to watch 48 hours of back-to-back programming from the most annoying presenter possible (possibly Adam Hart Davis),
OR
be sat down and forced to watch 48 hours of back-to-back programming of the same 10 minute program?

Be in one, i need at least someone to stop me frm dying every other minuite.

would you rather be killed by

drowning

OR

burnt?

Drowning, then I can let water into my lungs and spped up the process...

Would you rather someone have a voodoo doll of you which they burn and stab etc. every other hour of every other week, so you feel the pain continuously but don't die,
OR
Someone burn and stab you in real life and you do die?

do die definatly. it would be horrible to not die but experience pain over and over + it would be really akward, trying 2 chat up a girland then u fall on the floor and set alight and start spazzing! lol.

would you rather torture

your mum

OR

your dad

my mom

Would you rather:
live forever (if you get cancer your going to always have it and suffer and stuff.)
or
die right now