I say we review "Debbie does Dallas" first.

sorry for the spam-esque comment here but...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

my goodness. i almost dropped my monitor when i read that post >.<

Or next, "Debaser does Dallas"

;)

/me discusses

There was a lot of awful mention of bowls.

Only IRC kids will get that, btw. Naughty movie!

Review Midget in a Suitcase. Please.

Should have used a funnel... or a wetsuit...

I felt it had too many icecubes and not enough crossdressing...

wasnt that the one with the rubber duck?

..or is that taking it too far?

QUACK

shut up dace. and rubber ducks say sqeak anyway.

Midget in a Suitcase!

Warning: Cover image of DVD contains mildly explicit content.

Oh my.

The finer point of Dayan does Dallas came when Dayan did use the rubber duck. And the beard razor. And the crowbar. The scene was done beautifully, with excellent camera work and lighting. You could really tell he was a good actor.

/me hugs Dayan

since WHEN was this public knowledge? >_<

Oh don't bloody look at me!

sinse the first simple human decided to squeeze a rubber duck. naturally, it said "squeek" and thus was born a language!

I think he took it too far... which is how the problem arose...

holy jebus, i didnt think of that... yeah lets blame all this profanity on d-man for starting it all by being himself!

Will debs actually end up doing dallas unlike debbie?

I have my sources. Namely a drunken you.

See! I didn't tell anyone but Missy and whoever else was present. (Candice)

YOU told them about the duck!

Yes, Debs will fornicate with all of Dallas, and maybe Austin Texas.

pah! PAH, i tell you! PAH!!! damn you...

Pah - pa - papa - father - dad - daddy.

"DADDY DADDY DADDY"?

That's dirty, Debs.

/me moves to Dallas.

you know whats worst about this thread...i know what you are all talking about, i usually float into these shameful little places and then leave naively unaware of whats going on

but i know about the duck >_< and i saw a "documentary" - it may have been a program called sexetera with the woman who plays in that movie...i cant remember her name i was too busy hiding behind the couch and wishing i was asleep like a normal person...

Her name was Bridget the Midget, as it happens. I think she fronts a punk band now.

Very logical assumption there, syuu.

Just what did D-Man do in Dallas, did he shoot JR? Or was it a money shot?

YOU'RE ALL F--KERS, ALL OF YOU.

Yep he did the money shot .........

I think perhaps he did such a dastardly deed that he cannot even REMEMBER it.

gah! since when did this thread centre itself around my, uh, extracurricular activities? the title's "inky and syuu talk porn", not "everyone discusses deb's porn career"...

Ahhh so the D-Man had/has a porno Career ....... you mucky, mucky man!.

/me whispers can i loan one, i wan to critise your techniche (typo but i dont care).

everybody leave poor Debs alone... *stands in his defence* you all just leave him alone... *nod nod* that works... *walks away*

I believe InKy's porn carreer is skyrocketing as well.

Debs is just a personal favourite of all of us here at Matazone, because of the constant quality he puts out every time. That boy can act. *wipes a tear*

How has this managed to stay in ''media''?

It is media.. technically. And some daft..

Oh dear, Debs is a mod. >_>;

hehehehe.

...was i when i started? i forget...

...feh, can't actually DO anything about it, can i...grrr.

/me thwaps syuu

*wonders what he used in the thwapping*
*decides its better not to know*

thats what you get for drinking! (and having sex with a large city... i wonder if it was a female and male thing )

bump. >_>
because it was a wonderful thread.
wooooonderful.

good times!

also, in the interest of discussion, what does everyone CURRENTLY think of debbie does dallas? or..any porn you really, really enjoy, for that matter.

Holy thread necromancy Batman! Hi Syuu!

Sadly (or not, I guess it depends on your perspective) I'm not a porn connoisseur so can't really add anything useful to the thread; however, I have seen quite a few awful sex scenes in cheap action movies.

The sex scene in 'Showdown In Little Tokyo' was among the worst I've ever seen. Showdown... was a Dolph Lundgren film co-starring Brandon Lee. It had some quite fun martial arts, but hovers in the dark nights of the soul for the utterly unsexy bedroom scene. Sadly, it's Lundgren getting his kit off, we had to wait until 'Rapid Fire' two years later to see the infinitely more sexy Lee get nekkid.

hey mata!

see now, since i have dialup, i wind up having to purchase porn - unheard of, i know!
i recently got something called 'teacher's pet seven' that sounds pretty self explanatory. there's a girl that says she can't go to prom unless she learns how to take anal like this other chick she knows, so she asks her teacher to, err, teach..her. and it's ridiculously cheesy. the BEST part is, though, the guy who plays the teacher is actually in another porn called 'jenna loves bella', and he has the stunning role of a random midget riding a bike and pole dancing while jenna gets it on with a dead guy.

porn = awesome.
that's what i've learned, anyway.

You really do seem to have a talent for finding genuinely surreal porn. Is this an instinct born of living in Las Vegas, or some natural talent that you have discovered?

i think it's natural! i have an interesting bad luck streak - for instance, i was watching some hentail yesterday (for this thread and review purposes only, of course) and there was actually a great girl on girl scene - until one of them suddenly grew a penis.

you'd think Las Vegas would have great porn, but actually, it's all..interesting. i was in the adult shop just the other day where they've got porn going on a few screens located throughout, and i glanced over to see a midget having intercourse with a normal sized girl on top of a pony.

you should visit!

Dwarfs having sex with women on horse back... I'd always wondered where I could find that tape.

Transgendering does seem to be a popular thing in hentai. I guess it just covers all the bases!

I've magically found a close friend that happens to be a SuicideGirl and I swear to hyne that it's the most beautiful porn site ever (if you didn't have to be 21 in Mississippi, I'd be on it, I do think).

I was recently given roughly eighteen disks of pornography (I really like the word, the WHOLE word, it makes me tingly) including one (whose exact title I forget, but includes the word "Dirty") in which a person of (I assume) the female gender fits four rather large (ehm) male organs into either orifice. It takes place in some kind of mud ... type... well, a muddy place, and I have to wonder how much they get paid to have four dirty cocks shoved up their bum.

I'd much rather be a pinup girl, kthxbye.



Am I the only one who thinks that The Mist (recent Steven King story-cum-movie) should have included tentacle porn (and would have been VASTLY improved by it)?

A friend of mine collects porn as a hobby. Anything you could ever imagine, he probably owns it.