OK, I know there've been a couple of threads loosely based on Python, but you can never have too much!
If you don't like Monty Python, leave now, then jump off the nearest precipice, for you are not worthy of living.
Monty Python is teh brilliant! My favourite film was The Meaning of Life. Except maybe Life Of Brian. Or Holy Grail. Certainly some of the best lines were in Holy Grail. Here they are, to show how devoted I truly am:

"That's not a horse - you're just banging two halves of a coconut together!"

"This is a wedding! You're not meant to bicker and argue over who killed who! This is meant to be a happy occasion!"

"We already 'ave a 'Oly Grail"
"Oh. Can we see it?"
*Muttering*
"No."

"What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?"
"What do you mean - African or European?"
"What!? I don't know that -"
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!!!"
"How do you know so much about swallows?"
"Well you have to know these things when you're a King, you know"

"I am a sorcerer. Some call me... Tim!"

"There is it is!"
"What, behind the rabbit?"
"No you fool, it IS the rabbit!"

"There's a St Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh's in Cornwall, isn't there?"
"That's St Ive's, you idiot."

"She turned me into a newt! I got better..."

"Help! Help! I'm being repressed, I'm being repressed!"

"And the winter was harsh that winter. And they were forced to eat Robin's minstrels"
("Hooray!")

"I can take them on single handedly!"
"Oh yes! Let him take us on single-handedly!"
"No, it's far too perilous."
"But - "

"And then, the oral sex!"

"She's got huge... tracts o' land."


Feel free to add more. And donate blood to the Monty Python Campaign, so that the surviving cast members will never grow old!

I've only seen the Life of Brian.
Excellent film it is though.

I watched all of The Holy Grail the other day...I was cracking up laughing. I loved the bit with the knight who wouldn't let them pass so ended up having his arms and legs cut off. I was laughing my head off at that scene

I watched the Holy Grail for the first time about a week ago, and couldn't stop laughing. It was hilarious, and left me questioning why I hadn't seen the movie sooner.

I love the mother in Life of Brian.

"He's been a very naughty boy"



"In what direction shall we F*ck off oh leader?"

i love monty pythone, you have no idea how much

"you father was a hamster, and your mother smelt of elderberries"

- the lego scene on the holy grail dvd, lmfao! that was the greatest thing ever.....hehe


polo, i now love you for making this thread

I love the films, but The Flying Circus was ace. Who can forget the dead Parrot sketch?
"This Parrot is dead. It is an Ex-parrot. It has ceased to be!!!!"
Love it. Love the Gumblies characters too
"MY BRAIN HURTS!!!!"

oh. my. GOD, i love you. no one else listens to me when i mention this...it is quite possibly one of the funniest things i have ever seen...

tara - dead parrot sketch = best python sketch in the entire world...

the funniest joke in the world sketch as well....heheheheheh....

oh my really? thats scene redo is classic!!!

note to everyone: watch that scene on the dvd

you must bring us a shrubbery!

we must have anouther shrubbery, put a path between them and a little fence...

i fart in your genreal direction

yeah i havent watched it in a while, but i grew up watching them.

Ah, Monty Python. Firmly cementing England's dominance of comedy.

"Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving,
And revolving at nine-hundred miles an hour,
That's orbiting at ninety miles a second,
So it's reckoned,
A sun that is the source of all our power,
The sun and you and me,
And all the stars that we can see,
Are moving at a million miles a day,
In an outer-spiral arm at forty-thousand miles an hour,
In a galaxy we call the Milky Way..."

Such great songs!

"What are you going to do? Bleed on me?"
"Come back you coward!"

"Brave Sir Robin ran away,
Bravely ran away, away..."

"He's buggered off!"

"Errr, can I have spam spam spam spam spam spam ham and spam without the spam?"
"What!? You can't have spam spam spam spam spam spam ham and spam without the spam! It wouldn't be spam spam spam spam spam spam ham and spam without it!"
"Well, I don't much like spam."
"You don't like spam!?!?"
*Singing*
"Spam spam spam spam spam..."

(Between policeman and anonymous male)
"Morning."
"Morning officer."
"A fine day today, is it not?"
"Why yes, officer, it is."
"Taking a stroll around the park are we?"
"Why yes, actually"
"Not taking part in any... illegal activities then?"
"No, officer."
"Very good then."
*Pause*
"Do you want to come back to my place?"
"Alright then."

Never seen the Meaning Of life, something that shames me deeply, but my claim 2 fame is that my once-rabbit (now six bunnyfeet udner) was pratically the rabbit out of the holy grail! i kid u not. he used to chase ME round the garden, and i have sweaters eaten just where the white one bites ppl...

"But APART from all that, WHAT have the romans ever done for us?"
"Civilisation?"
"Oh, shut up!"

i dont remember the list itself *blushes* but im sure u all know what i mean!... aqueducts was in there somewhere... and roads....

(Meaning of Life, birthing mother and doctor speaking)

M: "What do I do? What do I do?"
D: "Hmmm?"
M: "What do I do?"
D: "Nothing dear, you're not qualified!"


M: "Is it a girl or a boy?"
D: "Well, I think it's a bit early to start enforcing roles on it."

I have the boxed set of all their films on DVD.

0\/\/|\|3|)

Quality, Saucy Tara, PURE QUALITY! :lol


And who can forget the rousing Every Sperm is Sacred? Good times.

Must really agree with Saucy though. Flying Circus was just top notch. Ministry of Odd Walks, wasn't it called? I always forget these things I loved that. No idea why. Sadly I've only seen a few episodes (Thank you BBC America! ) once a piece....really should borrow my mate's DVDs sometime....

It was Silly Walks. And indeed those walks were extremely silly.

/me has videotaped evidence of me performing these silly walks after a few drinks

Good lord, nothing is more depraved then a drunk gay man acting out his fave Python scenes

Ive seen all the films they a work of genius every single one manages to crack me up my fav is life of brian but their all great

I spent my lunch tuime today making Monty Python jokes with a girl in my writer's club. It's the quickest way to bond, I tell you. If you come across your long lost son, and he's afraid of you or something, if you make monty python references, well, you'll be a family quickly.

(okay, do not accept my opinion as it is most likely to get you in trouble. Or at least in custard.)

Anyone seen the slapping fish dance sketch ??

I rest my case

Fish slapping is good, but not as great as the demand for dead parrots, or talking slugs.

sorry, your not the only one, but oyu got that line really wrong.

"i am an encahnter...there are those who call me..tim?"

as i said, a few other people got theirs wrong, i just took that line as oen that should NEVER be messed around with.

im not much of a monty python fan though, i like black adder better. of course the best of all would be mata! DUH!

and now for somethign completely different.

my dad has every flying circus on DVD and all of the movies, plus a lot of the radio ones on recording as well.

I think monty python is the greatest (second only to mata) thing to hit media. I love it so much...(and yes, I am insanly good) that I did a power point slid presentation in the holy grail theme. It even had some animation too! (yes, 163 frams just for the animation) Let me just say the class I did this for....I got an A+ on the project. And everyone one voted me most creative that year. Yeah....that's all I have to say.

"...or we shall say Ni!"
"Nu!"
"No, No. It's Ni."
"Nu."
"NIE"

hehe yeah, not verbatim but close.


Oh, and if you'd like to see a Hogwarts version of a monty Python tribute.... Hogwarts - The Next Generation's tribute to Monty Python

My best friend in primary school put me on to Monty Python and it turned out to be a good thing and i have been hooked since...i love the movies tho i haven't seen some

i LOVE 'The Holy Gail'...i laughed so hard and for so long afterwards

(Arthur and the Black Knight, the Black Knight has refused to let Arthur pass and so Arthur has cut off both arms and legs)

BLACK KNIGHT:
Right, I'll do you for that!
ARTHUR:
You'll what?
BLACK KNIGHT:
Come here!
ARTHUR:
What are you going to do, bleed on me?
BLACK KNIGHT:
I'm invincible!
ARTHUR:
You're a looney!

lol i love the Knights who say Ni, or rather the Knights who no longer say Ni!!

Don't know whether I'll get all of these completely right but here goes...

Father: Sorry kids but theres been layoff up t'mill
kids: aw no our father
father: so I'm going to aff t' sell yu'all t' medical research.
kids: aw our father...
"Every spem is sacred every sprem is good,
Every sperm is needed in your neighbourhood,
Every sperm is sacred every sperm is great
If a sperm is wasted God gets quite irate."



"We're the knights of the round table we dance where 'ere we're able..."
Arthur: On second thoughts lets not go to camelot it's a silly place.

Peasant: 'Ow can you tell 'e's a king?
Peasant2: Cos 'e's got no shit on 'im

Get away from that welsh tart

Now write that out a hundred times before I come back

OMG! Our local Suncoast store now carries plushie toys of the bunny with sharp pointy teeth! I WANT ONE! THEY ARE SO ADORABLE! >_<

Brian: "I'm not the messiah, I'm not!"
(pause)
Woman follower: "Only the true messiah denies his own divinity!"
Brian: "What? Okay then, I AM the messiah!"
Followers: "He IS the messiah! He IS the messiah!"
Brian: "NOW F**K OFF!"
(pause)
Man follower: "Erm... how would you like us to f**k off, O Lord?"

Pure class...

DENNIS:
What I object to is that you automatically treat me like an inferior!
ARTHUR:
Well, I am King!
DENNIS:
Oh, King, eh, very nice. And how d'you get that, eh? By exploiting the workers! By 'anging on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society. If there's ever going to be any progress with the--
WOMAN:
Dennis, there's some lovely filth down here. Oh! How d'you do?
ARTHUR:
How do you do, good lady? I am Arthur, King of the Britons. Who's castle is that?
WOMAN:
King of the who?
ARTHUR:
The Britons.
WOMAN:
Who are the Britons?
ARTHUR:
Well, we all are. We are all Britons, and I am your king.
WOMAN:
I didn't know we had a king. I thought we were an autonomous collective.
DENNIS:
You're fooling yourself. We're living in a dictatorship: a self-perpetuating autocracy in which the working classes--
WOMAN:
Oh, there you go bringing class into it again.
DENNIS:
That's what it's all about. If only people would hear of--
ARTHUR:
Please! Please, good people. I am in haste. Who lives in that castle?
WOMAN:
No one lives there.
ARTHUR:
Then who is your lord?
WOMAN:
We don't have a lord.
ARTHUR:
What?
DENNIS:
I told you. We're an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week,...
ARTHUR:
Yes.
DENNIS:
...but all the decisions of that officer have to be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting...
ARTHUR:
Yes, I see.
DENNIS:
...by a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs,...
ARTHUR:
Be quiet!
DENNIS:
...but by a two-thirds majority in the case of more major--
ARTHUR:
Be quiet! I order you to be quiet!
WOMAN:
Order, eh? Who does he think he is? Heh.
ARTHUR:
I am your king!
WOMAN:
Well, I didn't vote for you.
ARTHUR:
You don't vote for kings.
WOMAN:
Well, how did you become King, then?
ARTHUR:
The Lady of the Lake,...
[angels sing]
...her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water signifying by Divine Providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur.
[singing stops]
That is why I am your king!
DENNIS:
Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
ARTHUR:
Be quiet!
DENNIS:
Well, but you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!
ARTHUR:
Shut up!
DENNIS:
I mean, if I went 'round saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!
ARTHUR:
Shut up, will you? Shut up!
DENNIS:
Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system.
ARTHUR:
Shut up!
DENNIS:
Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help! Help! I'm being repressed!
ARTHUR:
Bloody peasant!
DENNIS:
Oh, what a give-away. Did you hear that? Did you hear that, eh? That's what I'm on about. Did you see him repressing me? You saw it, didn't you?

I can't believe no-ones even mentioned the "And now for something completely different"

Chorus:
He's a lumberjack and he's okay,
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

Lumberjack:
I chop down trees, I wear high heels,
suspenders and a bra!
Oh, I wish I were a girlie,
just like my dear Papa!

Tart on Lumberjack's arm:
::cries:: Oh! I thought you were butch!

I have Holy Grail on DVD and video. AS well as Life of Brian and Meaning of Life on video. I prefer the Life of Brian to Holy Grail because it seems less polised and more amature.

Otto: "Suicide Squad....AAAAAAAAATTACK!"
*Squad draws their sword and stabs themselves. All fall over*

Monty Python were the best no questions asked. I have just finished teaching a unit based around Knights and chivalry to year 7 (11 year olds). Several of the class were most dissapointed that we couldn't watch Holy Grail in school and spent the whole 6 weeks tormenting me with "Ni!" Every time my back was turned I could hera someone muttering "Shrubbery...herring..." etc. Most fun I've had in ages!

The Flying Circus' Dead Parrot skit and Penguin on the Telly. One of the most entertaining moments of my life.

I'm going to see Spamalot on Broadway the day after it opens. *does a mad happy dance*

The geek in me is so excited it hurts.

Nudge nudge, wink wink, if y'know wot I mean.

Wasn't it Monty Python who did the "Killing Joke" sketch? A joke that was so funny anyone who read it, died laughing? As I recall, the joke was developed as a weapon by the nazis...

Indeed. Although you have it backwards; I believe it was used against the Nazis. [/nerd]

To-day we shall learn to defend ourself against a man with...a banana!

Oh, and don't forget about the Carniverous house... If I remember correctly, it was defeated by a giant cat...

Take off your panties, Sir William, I can not wait until lunchtime.

My nipples explode with delight!

I've got "and now for something completely different" and "live at the hollywood bowl" on video, and now holy grail on dvd.
The hollywood bowl video is the funniest thing...especially the live rendition of "sit on my face" because their all wearing aprons that show their bums when they exit stage!

Oh, the humour...and some people just don't get it. I don't know how they don't! Love Monty Python *off home to watch some more*

Got the entire Flying Circus on DVD for my dad for Christmas......needless to say, I was watching it as much, if not more than he was.

Exploding penguin on the telly!!!

*grins like a crazy person and runs off to watch more*

I have the entirety of Holy Grail committed to memory.

Four shall thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceedeth on to three. Five is right out!

the animations by Terry Gilliam were always hilarious...

He's got some serious things wrong in his head!