Hmmm, are you happy being single?

I've often thought this to myself, I can see the advantages of being single, no hassle, nobody to moan at me when I feel the need to spend 267 quid on external firewire drive (Because it has pink neon lights!) I can go out when I want and I can do what I want.

But when I lie down and think about it, I hate being single :/ I miss being loved/in love and all the bonuses that come with it, I guess i'm just tooooo soppy. I think had I never fallen in love I would not be in this mess.

Don't get me wrong, I love my friends, every one of them they all rock so much..... but I miss the extra love you get from someone special.

God I suck

Just brain spam.

Waddya reckon?

Being with someone doesn't stop you from going out. You just include your partner in on the going out with mates thing. Its no big deal.
Personally, I was miserable on my tod. I've been with Drarok for 2 years and I've never been happier

im actually quite happy being single! it would be good to have someone but being totally honest it doesnt put me up or down... my last serious relationship was probably the best i have ever had and although we broke up we are like really close friends! so...thats that then! dunno where that came from or where its going!

so i shall be off then!

Fal xXx

A lot of people I know are very happy being single. Most of my friends view relationships more as things that just get in the way. They have a point, but personally I'm not happy being single. Granted, I wasn't happy when I was in a relationship either, but it wasn't a very good one. I've been single for almost a year now, and I'm just really, really lonely. I feel left out all the time. If there's anything I miss about being with someone, it's being accepted. These days, I feel more like I'm being tolerated. And I'm lonely. My friends think I'm sexually frustrated, too. Oh, did I mention that I'm lonely?

Well, that was pathetic.

^ What they said

ive been single my whole life up until the 11th. before i was miserable...not solely because i was solo, but that played a huge role. but ever since magikeyes and i became serious about our relationship...i...ive never been hppier. i love her so inconceivably much...and i watn to be with her forever. she is a radiant beacon in my dark, desolate world. she is my everything and i trust putting my everything in her hands.
but i also see her as an individual-a person-and i fshe so chooses that she just doesnt feel love for me anymore i beleive i can accept that and move on (however i sincerely hope this does not come to pass). anyways, i hated beign single, but thats just my person, i need someone to love me and for me to love. and when everyone ahtes you both can be ahrd.

single which is my fault at moment have phone number of girl who i like and am being to much of a damn coward to call her

which is dumb i know

and no i dont enjoy single life

well, i adore being single... no worrying about when and who to eat with... the money thing always ends up out of control... i am a budget queen... until i get myself in a relationship.

the thing about liking being single is: if you're happy single, you wont stay that way long. that's just the way it works. i was thrilled with my life, not looking for anything, and along came ravein. and yes, she is the light in my heart, and the song that keeps getting stuck in my throat... but i wasnt looking for it.

power to freedom and singleness to those of you blessed with it! stay out late! buy yourself presents! enjoy!

*throws confetti*

Of course I'm not happy being single. I mean for the most part it's okay. But there's one huge problem I have with being single. There's no touching of the lay-dees. And that makes me sad .

*needs a girl*

i hate it i hate it i hate it!

course i've never really been not single for that long...but it was always better fun than being single, lonely and bored >_>

Hell no.

I take the bus to the apartment everyday then go lie on my futon staring at the ceiling dwelling on my exgirlfriends and how much of a loser I feel because I get shot down so goddamn much.

Right now, I just want a simple, friendly, semi-easy monogamist relationship that doesn't even have to involve sex for all I care. I just want someone other than my evaporating friends that I can love and trust and talk to, someone who cares and won't jack me around, someone who understands me when I'm down and accepts me for who and what I am, someone who accepts my compliments and apologies and tells me that I do things right, someone who in some form or another "gets" me and won't be offended when I need "me" time, someone in which I can find one thing, a smile, loving eyes, something that makes her so amazingly beautiful that I can't get her image out of my mind, someone who won't yell at me for the scars on my arm and face or puts me down or belittles me or is so damn fickle that she pulls the make-up-break-up crap that tears at my heart.

Is that too much to ask for?

Me too. Me too.





Wanna be lonely together?

Boo sadness!

I have to agree with karis - I was having an absolute ball being single. Was single for about 15 months after a messy breakup of a long term relationship. Didn't want a relationship - some sex would have been nice, but couldn't be bothered to deal with all the crap that traditionally goes with it, and the idea of paying for it really didn't appeal.

Then I moved to Seattle at the start of this year, and reckoned I was ready to start some idle dating again. So I did for a few months - had lots of fun, met some cool people. Still wasn't looking for anything even remotely serious, was having quite possibly the best time of my life being technically single, then bumbled into Kat and WHAMMO!

The rest is history, and if everything goes according to plan (which it ought to), there'll be lots more history to be made.

Anyway, waffle over, the point is that I thought I was top banana happy being single, and I was, but now I'm even happier by a factor of 18.lots

Yay me.

Hmm... I think it would be nice to have a relationship, and of course getting laid, and I'm always looking out for someone. But at the same time I find that I'm pretty happy being single. I've been single for the great majority of my life, and let's face it, not one of us is ever going to be double. We all live alone, have our own consciences and minds and lives. That doesn't mean that you can't have lovely relationships with people, but you'll always remain autonomous and have your seperate thoughts and feelings no matter how co-dependent you get. In the end you have to rely on yourself for what you need, not depend on other people to give it to you, or somehow complete you.


We're born alone and we die alone. In between, how about a drink?

sure it sucks being single.no sex,no hugs,no love.turns out that during my six month relationship,i didnt actually have love.my partner said it just to get me in bed.but towards the end of the relationship,he had changed so much,that i was miserable.i knew he was too,i also knew that he had been cheating on me all along with his ex.i kinda expected to be dumped,but it still came as a damn shock.i guess everything does,when its about someone u love.but although i have my bad days,i'm a lot happier now,and hey,the night is young!

I have finally come to a point in life where I am content with just about everything...even being alone! I have become really happy because of some spiritual pursuits, and after all that soul-searching (which nearly tore my family apart, but has now worked itself out), being with a male doesn't seem like such a big deal. Of course, I have also never been in a real relationship. Sure, I think it would be nice to have someone to go to the movies with and hold my hand and all that silly lovey stuff...But I'm not in a huge hurry...Just got out of a few TERRIBLE crushes...

im not that happy being alone, but things are looking good right now. me and this girl arent an item yet, but we practically are.

can you be a couple without ever mentioning it out loud?

I was happy being single. I'm happier in a relationship. I'm sure that (pain of breakup aside) I'd be happy being single again. I'm an adjustable kind of fellow.

I guess I'm not as adjustable.... lol I feel really lonely. Then again, even when I had a boyfriend, I felt like that sometimes....

I don't want to be with just anyone for the sake of being with somebody.... I want somebody who I know really and truly loves me. I want somebody I know I can trust and depend on. I want somebody special to enjoy things with... even just sitting at home and watching tv. I want somebody I can talk to about anything. I want somebody who will hold my hand, rub my hair, touch my cheek, hold me in his arms....

This is depressing.... lol

I absolutetly loath being single. That's right LOATHE! Sure it gives me time to work on ME and spoil ME and do what I want and what not but I think the negatives just totally out weigh the positives.

There's no one there to cuddle with after a bad day. There's no one other than my mom to say, "I love you" before hangining up the phone, and well that just doesn't feel as good. There's no one to take care of when they're sick. There's no one to take care of you when you're sick. It makes going out to see movies or eat a hassle. As in you have to find a friend or group of friends who are willing to go too or just go by yourself, and by yourself just isn't as much fun. There's no one to tell me I'm beautiful and for me to actually think they might be telling the truth. (I know that's petty but it's just hard to buy from friends who don't want you or you don't want.)

The thing I hate most about being single though is this. I am perpetually the third or fifth or seventh wheel, because my friends all have boyfriends or girlfriends or husbands and there I am the alone one. The one no one can really picture in a relationship. The one who when they are in a relationship everyone finds it odd just to see them holding hands with another person.

hm.. to me being single isnt that bad, isnt that great. I mean, your free to do whatever u want basicly with anyone of your choice, but if you have a open relationship u can do the same thing. I honestly have no problem with being in or out of a relationship. Being single doesnt bother me neither does being taken. I like the extra feeling of being taken care of, and being loved and cared for. But if i dont have it, o well. the thing that does bother me is when people think they have to have a signifigent other to be "normal" or to be the best they can be,. My frend Melanie thinks if she has a boifrend ,she is smarter and prittyer,.... when she is normaly uber beauftiful and uber smart// i dont think poeple should be dependent on a boifrend/gurlfrend. I just think they are great to have... becuase they care and love you.

It's funny, whenever I talk about the girls I've dated who have dumped me (or the friends with whom I've made love and with whom I've seriously discussed marriage three days before she dates the town gooff*ck), the females who hear about how I treated them like gems, honored, respected, loved and to whom I devoted time, effort, energy and funds usually say something to the effect of, "Awwww..." It's as if no matter how much one loves and values a girlfriend, he is inevitably jacked around and dumped miserably, that is unless for his sake he has to end the relationship. That may not be true for all guys, but that sure as hell is my situation time after time after time.

Well there was me thinking I was the only one.

Maybe this is just me, but I've never had a problem doing things alone. Going to the cinema alone, going for walks alone...in fact, I love it. Yep, probably just me.

Nah, I hear ya. I spent 3 months last year pretty much on my own, while I was living in a small town in the desert in Southern Cali. Had no friends, the people I worked with were nice enough, but most of them were 20+ years older than me.

I was ready to be done with it by the time I finished, but I can't really say I was unhappy at any time. I just found ways to entertain myself.




stop laughing in the back.

I'm the same way Commie. I love gadding about by myself. It rather disturbs the Mr. for some reason though. Don't know why, but he thinks it's really odd that sometimes I'd rather go to a movie by myself than with other people.

Maybe I should ask Jonman about that.

Heh. Yeah, the solitary life seems to suit me pretty well, too. For some weird reason, I enjoy my own company at times over anyone else's...

Probably doesn't bode well for the future, eh...

I'll make this simple

When Im taken I want to be single again
And when I'm single I want to be taken

Lifes a whopper isnt it? I know that might not make sense but theres certain liberties that come with each. I guess you just have to wait for the right person to come along to make it feel like you never want to be single again. I'm guessing once that person comes then maybe I wont be so lonely...

sorry, Im a little sappy on this subject seeing as how I just broke up with my bf of a year and a half lolz

It does make sense. For me, whenever I'm single, I'm always out looking for chicks. When I find one, I often find myself in a relationship where something bothers the hell out of me or I'm attracted to someone else and I feel guilty. Dammit, I'm depressed again.

I've been single for a really, really, really long time. I've had a few friendships that had the chemistry to develop into something further but never did for one reason or another, but that's about as close as it's gotten in the last three years.

Frankly, I think I'm cursed, and that I might as well hang my "Single For Life" certificate on the wall. I know that's a horribly stereotypical thing for a teenager to say, and trust me, I've heard the "No you won't - you're too awesome to be single forever! In fact, I don't know why you're single right now..." protests way too many times for it even to be a valid statement anymore.

Let's face it. The particular combination of traits that I have makes it awfully difficult to date someone like me. People (especially men) don't seem to want to date women that are as (or more) intelligent and witty than they are. People like to date asthetically pleasing individuals, which is a quality I lack.

As if those two statements don't make things difficult, I have one requirement that must be fufilled: the person must be very tolerant of all kinds of people. You'd be surprised how hard it is to find someone who is open-minded towards all sexualities, all religions, all cultures, all walks of life, and both genders.

I suppose if there is no such person who can geniunely me and be unbigoted, well, then I guess being single is preferable to dating jerks. But it doesn't mean that I like its accompanying loneliness one bit.

Its weird for me cos i always end up getting chucked (i really need to find a better word for that). When im with a guy im totally devoted to them (i have this whole obsessive thing going on) but when im alone... well ive always been a kinda "lone wolf" type person so it doesnt bother me i guess.

Or at least thats the way its been before - right now im in a relationship with a guy who lives 150-200 odd miles away, and i love him like ive never loved anyone in my life before. We spent last weekend together and when he went home i was thinking - most relationships ive been in i knew life would go on if we split, but this guy... well if he leaves me (and i will never leave him) i dont think im gonna get over it. So maybe the answer now is "no i dont wanna be single"...

Bah im confusing myself...

I think one general problem I have is that very few people (if any) "get" me. I'm quite misunderstood by the general populace. I mean, people think I'm nice and I've made many acquaintences, but finding a pesron who in some form or another understands me is quite difficult. It kinda pisses me off that so many people have these misconceptions of me that are far from the truth. I always figured that I'm just one of those people who can't be loved by everyone, so the person I find who will love me and accept me for who I am, chances are that person will be ultra-loving, caring, sweet and all of the things I want in a chick. I had a talk about this with my friend Liz last night. She's in a wheelchair and is really self-concious about it. She thinks that it's something that prevents her from dating anyone. I told her that anyone who wouldn't date her because of the wheelchair isn't worth her time. It's that person's loss. I told her that she needs a quality person who can look past her wheelchair and see her for the awesome person she is. I dunno. That's my philosophy on said situation.

Being single is great well its pretty much all iv ever known iv never really looked for anybody and I don’t want anybody either, which really confuses my friends. I’m probably a little bias but I think relationships are pointless they seem more trouble than they are worth being alone/single is usually perceived as a negative thing but it really isn’t

just going back to the original point here,what exactly do you class by "single"?becuase there is still the joyful,yet empty bliss that is one night stands.

I hate being alone. Loneliness allows me to think - and thinking makes me depressed. I think about all the stupid things I've ever done and said, and then I physically cringe. I hate walking alone too. It just feels like a task, a way of getting from A to B. I have to be talking, interacting all the time. I don't mind "phasing out" when I'm around people, because then I know I can just switch back on again and start talking. Talking to myself, even in my head, makes me feel hideously self-conscious. I need company like I need chocolate - I could live without it, but life would be a pile of crap.

What bliss? Yeah it's fun at the time and it's cool to tell your friends, but after all of that wears off, I'm left with the "I want to die" feeling. The second chick I've ever had sex with I've never seen again. This other time, I speant the night with a friend of my older sister's. Thankfully she went to the OB/GYN the day before and couldn't have sex or we would have. I remember after my first one night stand, I felt amazingly misreable and even cried. I felt even more hollow and alone than normal. I almost cut myself for it. I try to limit my sexual activities now to my girlfriends and deep, close friends, like my friends Harmonie and Liz (not the one in the wheelchair;another Liz). At least with them I know I'll love them for the rest of my life. I know I'll never seeBrandy or Denise ever again, so I don't want to make any more mistakes than I already have.

Huh?

I've been to the gynecologist once a year since I was 15 (that's 6, going on 7 years), and I never once was unable to have sex the day after. The day before, yes, but the day after? Hmm. Well, I assume she must have had some sort of treatment that is none of my business...like a D&C....eww. I can understand not having sex after that...but if it was just a normal checkup, that makes no sense.

Meanwhile, back to the original issue. I was happy being single for a little while after I got out of a really bad relationship. It was just nice to be on my own...with no overbearing guy or girl in my life. But now...I don't know how I would cope with being single. I imagine it'd take me years to come to grips with it and learn to be happy. I've been one half of a very happy couple for nearly four years now. I just cannot imagine my life without my husband. It's scary for me to feel that dependent on someone...simply because things do happen that take people away and I know that I'd just fall apart. Very scary stuff. Don't wanna think about it anymore.

Not to get into too much gross detail, it was a biopsy where some cells were taken from her cervix to see if she was in the early stages of cervical cancer and if she were to have sex it wouldn't have healed.

did anyone else just think "ouch"?

Sorry to spam a serious thread....

Indeed you want to be careful with tissue that's damaged.

Anyway. One night stands... They sound appealimg in principle. Before you have one. I ended up giving up on them because, at the end of the day, while I got sex, they just weren't what I wanted.

While you get 'a bit of the other' that certainly isn't a good reason to shag a person.

Fuzzy's right. It does sound all good at first, but unless you like that empty feeling (like that slut bitch Ellice...grrr) then it's just a cycle of pain.

Yup. It can take under an hour to go from feeling great because you got laid to feeling like baked crap because your fun was ultimately worthless.

I've never had a one night stand and I never plan to. Some people may like it, but it's just not my cup of tea.

I'm rather old fashioned when it comes to that area, actually. I married the only person I've ever slept with. Waited till it was right and blah blah all that lovely cliched stuff.

Oh, I forgot in my earlier post...I'm another person who likes doing stuff on my own. Like when we lived in NYC, I loved just walking around by myself a lot of the time. I'd walk down to Riverside Park, sit so I was only facing trees, plug my ears so I couldn't hear the traffic, and pretend I was back in Oregon..lol. I was rather homesick at the time. But here I like to walk around by myself too. I don't know if I'd say I prefer my own company to that of others...but I definitely need some alone time now and then or I'll go nuts.

Brrrrrrr@me

I like having time alone... to read mainly. I'm okay staying at home by myself.... I just have never been able to get myself to go out someplace by myself. I'll go to the grocery store by myself, but never to the movies, park, and places like that....

I was really happy being single.. Until i got a girlfreind... and learnt that i was unhappy when single... but i have a girlfreind again now... so im happy now.. I guess eventually i would adjust to being happy single again but i dunno how long it would take...

I was happy with no girlfriend for a while, probably because I hadn't, and still have, never had one, but then about halfway through last year, I wasn't anymore. I didn't know why until about 3 months ago. That's when I realized, it was because I loved my good friend (we'll call her M for privacy purposes) M. Ever since then I've been trying to work up the courage to ask her out. I haven't yet, but recently the Irish Mafia (not really the Irish Mafia, just a small group of my friends that includes me that calls themselves the Irish Mafia, yeah, we're odd) has been trying to help me. So, to sum it all up, no.

Maybe I'm just a whiney bum or maybe, considering the last time I had sex was out of eros not agape and the person I slept with is not only the woman I love most but is also now dating a complete gooff*ck, my lonliness is legit.

Eros = Romantic love
Agape = Spiritual love