grrr...*edits*

you lose all interest in fire so when your house burns down you ignore the flames and die

I wish these damn paparatzi would leave me alone because of my unbelievable good looks

Wish granted-you now live in an aquarium.



I wish that whenever I did this: '^_^' it didn't turn into a smiley.

arg! ><

Wish granted---but now they follow you because you're so damned ugly.


I still want the afore mentioned wish! ^^^^^^^

Wish granted, but next time you type '^_^' it turns into a zombie sheep and eats you

I wish I could think of something to wish for

You think of something to wish for, but the genie doesn't grant it.

I wish I could write better.

you can cuz i sez so!!

but you break both your arms and have dislexic legs so u cant write at all...

(dislexic legs??)lol

i wish i my friend woul get online

They get online, but now they aren't your friend and they hate you. They want to kill you in your sleep as well.

I wish I had enough money to buy a new unicycle

You do! Then you get mugged for it.


I wish thinking of a wish wasn't so hard...

Granted. But then you think of so many wishes and you can't think of anything else for as long as you live. You wither away, a very unhappy man.

I wish there weren't so many stupid people on earth.

(Me too.) Wish granted, but then all of the stupid people are sent into outer space. Extra terestrial beings find them and assume all people on earth are stupid, then destroy earth.

I wish this stupid person would stop talking to me... I think my IQ dropped 3 points

They stop talking, but a stupider person comes along.

I wish my friend wouldn't be so anal sometimes.

granted but your friend becomes so good that in the end you go crazy over the lack of the annalness (trust me it happens) and jump off a cliff.

I wish I could do anything I wanted to

you can...except you um....want to help me thing of a bad way this could happen..

ooh you get this power by losing your leg and freeing your totem spirit

you cant get the leg back and the other one falls off...for laughs





i wish i had some pants....

( I would just get 2 robot legs that could turn itnot rockets to let me fly I can do whatever I want LOL)


back on topic

granted but as soon as you get out in public they fall off and so do your underpants.


I wish that I had a more orgonal wish.

you do but you cant spell it so you end up with a half eaten pie and a 12 pack of condoms


*pulls up panties*

lol..

i wish my hair was straight

Now it is, but your pants drop again, and one of Darness' condoms falls in, making people around you extremely confused, and thereby dangerous.

I wish that my english project would be done...

granted!

but it accidentally flies into a wood chipper five seconds befor u turn it in


i wish i could get a response to my threads

And now you do get responses. But.........the responses are so many, and so innane, the meaning of your threads gets lost in the confusion.

I wish my luck with the ladies would rise drastically.

granted but your luck is with a sycopatic killer who lures men to their home then kills them in the worset way posable (for sure painfullness of this death this post has been sencored)


I wish that I could spell better so people would stop making fun of my spelling.

Wish granted, you become a PhD Graduate in linguistics, but the college life goes to your head. You go aout to numerous parties every night, get drunk and sleep with too many men (women?). You are the laughing stock of the campus, and the university strips you of your degree and expells you, blacklisting you and your family from everything that requires a year 7 education or higher.

I wish I had a cigarette... or more, I wish my lungs were up to having a cigarette...

Wish granted--but then your mom smacks you in the head for such a habit and it drops in your crotch and forever keeps you from having children.


I wish I could actually FINISH one of my stories _ _;

You finish one... unfortunately it's the only one that showed no promise...




I still want a cigarette... I might just have one...

Wish Granted, you pluck a stick out of the box, taking no heed of the 'Smokers Die' label flashing at you. Flick goes your lighter and you begin to fire it up, when you are hit by a bus.

I wish I didn't need to do revision today.

Wish granted, your school burns down on a day you're not there and all your friends die.


I wish I was a box.

(now what you did to mine was just mean I mean the rest is ok but men??? I'm a man not a girl and not gay I take a lot of offence to that one. )

wish granted you become a box and are forced to be owned by a sex crazyed hobo and he screws you every night and when it rains you fall apart and then your peaces are burned by being hit by lightning.



I wish I were better at thinking up was of verble revenge.

You will note that I included "(women?)" due to my not knowing what gender you were, not only that, but perhaps you should open your mind to other sexualities. I mean, it's hardly an insult.



Wish granted, your ability to conjure up sick fantasies is trebled, that's right, trebled. But one faithful night, you come across a gang of skin heads, you insult them in the most gory way you can, and they kill you with their push bikes.


I wish I was an orangutan.

Granted, but now you live in a zoo and people make funny faces at you all day. (I can't be mean in the morning. I'm still asleep.)

I wish I wouldn't fall asleep every other day in math...

Wish granted, you stay wide awake in maths but get so bored you start hitting yourself over the head with a stapler and eventually pass out

I wish I didnt have to sit on the train for 4 hours tomorrow

Wish granted! You take a taxi instead, but the driver happens to be a terrorist. Good luck with that one!



I wish I could lick my elbow.

wish granted your in a freak car acident and your arm gets ripped off right above your elbow. happy licking.


I wish I could find my half life cd

EDIT- OOPS! this was for Dreams on Hiatus:
Congratulations! You are officially a contortionist! Unfortunately, when your contract runs out with Cirque du Soleil, you realize you have no other skills and are left out in the cold, contorting for spare change from passersby.

And for Lord:
You open your closet door and see the CD! Hurray! However, you moan as all of the crap tumbles out of your closet, burying you in a pile of refuse, clothing, and dusty memories.

I wish I was funnier.

Wish granted! Everyone laughs at your jokes so hard that they eventually die, and you're the only person left on Earth.

I wish I had snakes for hair.

wish granted the snakes imdately eat you and you die.

I wish I had more little funny things to put on top my computer

You do, unfortunately they crush your computer with weight and you can't gain access to the internet.

I wish this damn holiday woul dbe over and my relatives would get out of here!

wish granted but a secreat plan by the rusain goverment was to drop an atomic bomb on your house after the holodays and there for they do you blow up in your own home.




I wish that I had a better one for the above wish

Wish granted. Now you are famouse and people are tearing off your hair and stuff so they can have a suvenier (yes I know I spelled it wrong)


I wish I could write better poetry!

Granted, but it's only considered better after you die, and meanwhile you live the life of a lonely bum.

I wish the brand spankin' new computer that I didn't touch other than downloading Adobe Reader and MSN Messenger would recognize the CD drive. --;

wish granted but the computer cetches on fire becouse it somehow overclocks itself there for distroying the entire computer.

I wish I had a working scanner

granted but everything it scans vanishes from the real world and you just scanned your arse...oops

I wish I could drive better in the rain

granted but then an earthquake stikes and you are kill in a horrible mountan of dirt and rubble

I wish I had more pocky

You do, its delivered on a big truck cos theres so much and it all falls on your head and then a cement truck crashes into it and you get covered in cement dust, then a water truck comes along and crashes as well and the cement gets wet, then a kitchen blender truck and electricity truck crash into you as well, the cement gets all mixed up and solidifys and you spend the rest of your life cemented under a large pile of pocky, forced to drink rain and eat passing ants

I wish I actually had space for all the junk in my room

Wish granted. Only now everything has its own place and you can't find jack shit because it's not within arms reach.

I wish I was taller.

granted but height has its disadvantages, trousers are never long enough, door ways are never tall enough...you die from cold ankles and a concussion

I wish my nose was like a tap stuck in the off position

wish granted. You fail to smell the deadly gass wish kills you moments after you can no longer smell.

I wish I was at otakon.

It is, but then all the mucous and snot builds up in your nasal passages, and it is so thick that it can't drain down the back of your throat, and your nose swells up, and eveyone avoids you because you look so freaky, and one day you have to sneeze, and it's in the middle of class, and all the nose junk blasts out everywhere, like a massive popped pimple, but it's all green and yellow and infected...and it gets all over your classmates and teacher....and you become known as the "snot kid" for ever after, and they even write about you in the school newspaper and yearbook and make fun of you in the valedictory address.

I wish I could time travel.

Damn it! someone beat me.

Wish granted! you are at otakon, where ever that is, but it's really sucky and not at all what you hoped it would be like. You are really angry because it cost you lots of money to go there.

I still wish I could time travel. Unless that's already been said. If it has, someone make up and new story about it to humor me.

(otakon couldnt be I get to meet frends I've only meet online and I loved last years. It's gaming and anime there is no greater.)

wish granted but you travil to far back and end up at the big bang and are distroyed in the exspoltion. then the particals that are left of oyu are conted by geeky scientitst that are always horny (you get the picture)

I wish I could fly

Wish granted! But you fly yourself right off of a cliff and into a moat of ravenous aligators.


I wish I had a moogle of my very own...


(If you don't know what a moogle is, it's a bat-like creature)

wish granted, you get a moogle, but nobody can work out what it is and nor can it so it randomly changes into lots of different things and one of them decides to eat you before changing shape again

I wish I didnt have to use 56k for the next 3 weeks

Wish granted! However, you get an even slower connection, and die of boredom while waiting for a page to load.


I wish I could draw better.