I've been thinking a lot about my life lately and I've determined that it sucks. Well, more appropriatly, I suck. THis was sparked when I was thinking about Harmonieand comparing our lives. She's been working at the same job for over two years and is now an assistant manager. She has a nice new car (that she hasn't wrecked) and has a decent, mature social life.

Then there's me.

I'm such a loser. I can't hold a job. I've wrecked two thirds of my cars (the second exploded by itself). I can't keep off of drugs or booze. There's no way I'll be able to move out of my parents' house or get on my feet until my mid twenties. I literally have no money save the dollar in my wallet and some change. If I still smoked, I wouldn't even have enough to buy cigarettes. My social life sucks; my friends with cars all have lives and I can't see my other friends becuse they either 1) can't drive or 2) live too far away. My life is in shambles. Part of me wants to get some booze (somehow) and pass out in a gutter with a pack of cigarettes, but I know that won't do a damn bit of good.

God I'm depressed.

EDIT: Add to this the fact that I feel like I can't do a damn thing right and you get the complete reason why I'm depressed. THis fact, I feel, solidifies my whole arguement.

You may feel like a loser now, like everything is hopeless, but let it pass. Slowly it can, and if you're like me once you feel better you won't be able to comprehend why you felt the way you did.

For the moment, find something to occupy your time. Comedy Central is honestly a great thing. So is one of your favorite movies. Hey, even the Buddy Christ is there waiting for a conversation.

Just remember, everyone is a loser. Nobody's life is perfect, and others might be doing a good job of hiding their issues, but they probably have them too.

Let it pass, it may seem like it never will, but I'm sure it will.

Hope that helps, you have our support.

my dear, dear, Ri...what's going on, bud??

snap out of the depressive funk!! think about all the good things you have in your life. it could be a lot worse, ya know.



and if that doesn't work...well just remember:

i'm always at Giant Eagle pushing around a buggie if you need to call and chat.

Ri, I know I'm younger and stuff, I know we haven't ever really spoken on a regular basis before but I'm being utterly honest that when I say I respect and admire you.

In addition to Sir Maxerpopple's points I want to let you know that I think the whole fact of you recognising your shortfalls, even admitting them to many people who know you and accepting your faults is a huge signal that you will oversome them one day. It may seem arduous and pointless sometimes but would you rather accept what your problems are and attempt to fix them, or be one of those unfortunate people who lets the suffering overtake them and twist a perfectly good individual into a cynical and hateful person?

Because that's what I see most in you Ri, you're a basically good person, everyone has their times of suffering and you'll get through yours too, I know you will because you have so many friends who love you and want to help you, and I know you're strong enough to do it.

Please take care.

Laura xx

I had a long talk with Spiffy last night after a few beers (minor hangover this morning). We got into a bit of an arguement about this. Okay, we got the claws out. I feel like a bum but Trina told me that, basically, I need to get up (figuratively) and realize my good points and not go off the deep end whenever I have a setback. It's not easy, but I'll do my best.

And Laura, you're not much younger than I am. You're what? 16-17? That's how old my girlfriend is.

if all you are going to do is look at the negitive in your life, and see what everyone else has that you dont, of course you are going to get down. and not only that, you'll never get out of that state. everyone thinks their life is crappy at some point, and that their life is somehow worse then everyone else's. but if you focus on the good things, the things that make you happy, the people who care about you and possible love you.. then you will see how lucky you really are. until you do you will continue this loser felling of yourself.

I think the big thing is, dont see yourself as being so different from everyone else. I think everyone has a time like what your going through. Eventually you'll get through it, or find little things that make life a little easier.
Nice little walks in the morning can be helpful to clear the mind. Doughnuts from you local grocery place are nice (and very cheap compared to most things).
Rather then looking at what your friends have, I would suggest you start looking at what you want it in life. So your friend is an assitant manager at some place, is that what you want to do with your life? If so then ask her how she did it, if not then I wouldnt bother caring to much, as its not what you want.
I know we havent personally talked to much, but from your posts I'd say your a very respectable guy. And you've got some darn strong morals that I think you should be very proud of.

all I have to say is see lol

I didn't bother posting here because I've repeated myself so many times to you - and I know for a fact that everyone else would say what I wanted to say for me. Stop thinking so poorly of yourself. I don't know how many times I've told you that you're an amazing individual. I don't do it for my good healt you know -- I say it because it's true. You're definitely goofy, and maybe even a sex fiend, but so are the best of us.

I've gotten lower than this before. Grade 5 around there. I was picked on so much that I thought and thought and THOUGHT about killing myself. I've put up with bullsh*t for over 12 years or around that.

Reason I brought up past scars was to say it cannot, no matter what you say, it cannot get worse than that. You are a good person but sometimes I will say you are just too damn pessimistic on yourself. I know at times I can be a hypercrit, but it is true. Just keep on trucking buddy. It'll be hard but just take one day at a time, do what everyone else says, and know I love ya man

*feels righteous* you don't feel like a loser to me.....too squishy >_>

Very good, SPS. You get a cookie.

mmm....cookie, now with spammy chunks

Hmm. One of my favorite quotes, from The Princess Bride, said it better than I can. "Life is pain. Anyone who tells you differently is selling something."

Everyone thinks their life sucks at some point. Some people never escape from thinking their life is horrible. Like Phoenix pointed out...if you keep looking at what others have that you don't and focusing only on the negative, you'll never escape from that feeling of "Woe is me, I'm a loser, my life sucks."

Basically what I'm saying is stop complaining about how bad it is and actually do something about it. Actions definitely speak louder than words...and to me it seems like you aren't really trying to make things any better. Sorry if that's harsh, but that's how it appears to an outsider who hardly knows you.

lol that just happens to be my favorite quote from that movie too.

or in general

anyways, I'm beginning to like pain, it can keep you company and let you know that you're still alive.

Oh, and when life gives you lemons - throw them back and tell it to make it's own friggen lemonade.

yeah, i'm seventeen but i have no idea how old you are and you seem grownup

my points still stand!

*huggings most muchly*

hehe...i like that, i might steal it for a screen name, if thats ok?

i don't know you at all, really, but you've got trina in your life, and she's wonderful so it can't be all bad
look to the little things like warm sunshine (if there is any) sitting by a river, watching the clouds...i don't know, something unrelated to you. always makes me feel better *shrugs and hugs ri*

*Hugs Ri* Itll pass these things always do.

And the last thing you need to hear right now is a 16-year old telling you what to do to solve all your problems so I wont.

*Huggles again*