Originally posted on the Urban Freakshow Forums:

What do you want done with your mortal remains?

My plans keep changing, my current one is slightly...odd. I want my body to be rendered down into component parts. My skull (without lower jaw) to be given to whichever relative or loved one I like most at the time. My skin is to be made into parchment, with Edgar Allen Poe's The Raven inscribed on it, then framed - that'll be given to someone too. My bones to be carved into a chess set, if there's any bone left then a set of dice too. Meat and offal, and anything else without any real use to be fed to felines and birds (if any of my relatives or friends want to eat any of me they're welcome to me, I'm assuming they won't though). Hair...I don't know, can't really figure out what to do with that. Anyone have any ideas?

The basic idea behind it is that there's no point keeping any of my body around doing nothing, it may as well serve some purpose now I'm not using it.

Cremation for me. I've always wanted to fly.

some people use hair to make tapestrys but I dunno if that would appeal at all just an idea.

Cremate me and put my ashes somewhere where my loved ones would best like to remember me. I don't really care where, exactly, and seeing as it's post-mortem, I don't see how it would matter to me anyway!

If I was famous... maybe I would see if someone would mummify me. That would be cool.

Oh, and organs, blood and bone marrow will be donated to whoever takes donations of those things, I know people want that stuff.

Really, tapestries? I'd like that, but the problem is I think that would require even more hair than I currently have...

A wig for someone in the family with no hair.

Cremation here. As i don't fancy waking up in a coffin. *shudder*

err...well you could start saving now build up a hair bank or something

I've never really thought about what I want to happen when I die, I don't like the idea of being cremated or buried...

Tea cosy.

I remember one of my teachers saying that one woman (or man, i can't remember) had her body cremated, then the ashes turned into inperfect diamonds, which were put into jewellery and given to the daughters. I thought that was a pretty neat idea. I'm all for the idea of once you're dead, you're dead, and saving the body is pointless, but i'm still not too sure about what i'd like doing with it. A friend of mine had a nice idea about being buried under a tree, to return to nature.

That would be a Life Gem.

I dont really tend to think about it too much, but I always thought the Life Gems idea was sweet. Id like to find a way to be with someone I devoted myself to in life. I thought being buried close to them or having your ashes mixed would be a gd way.

Your idea rocks though Commie

I would like to be cut open, and be on a autopsy show..... Then of course I would make sure than Michael Boden (Maybe its Bowden) (sp) cuts me up and explores my insides! Then after that I would like it cremated and have my ashes spread over Mt. Everest (The top)!! That would be cool.....

Definitely organ donation, then probably cremation of what's left or burial.

I'm all for simplicity ^_~

David

I really don't care what they do with me, so they can take whatever they like. As for how to be disposed, it is required by law to have a coffin even if buried, and I want to make the cost real cheap, hence not buying a coffin. There's a guy in Florida who does funerals for 400 dollars with a cardboard box, sounds like a plan. Hopefully by the time I do die there will be someone like him with common sense.

All I'm sure of is that I don't want to be lying in a box taking up space and generating what I consider to be the ultimate rent invoice ...

Organs and stuff go one way and anything else is a question of getting rid of it as fast and cleanly as possible. Symbolism is for those that survive me.

Ana chooses to leave it entirely up to the loved ones that live on. I find this an interesting and considerate choice.

As I've said before - stuffed, mounted and displayed so my minions can continue to worship me.

Yeah...

Either cremation, organ donation or donating my body to someone who might want to cut it open and discover stuff. Either one.

swallow a lot of pennies when you were a kid? car keys?

.. first thing i thought of on reading your post. some kinda excavation. ;P

but i know what you mean.

-cm

If you die really old, you might not have much hair left, so you might not need to worry about it. However, if you do have some left, you could make a lovely set of paint brushes with it, possibly with bone handles--ideal for writing poetry on skin parchment.

For myself, I would go for organ donation. And cremate whatever is left. I do like the idea of your remains being useful, so perhaps my cremains could be used as fertilizer in some relative's garden.

None of my relatives would ever do that...they'd put my cremains (heh heh) in an urn or something. Personally, I'm sort of uncomfortable with being cremated, even if I'm already dead and it doesn't matter. I want them to sever my major veins like they did to Eleanor Roosevelt so I don't wake up in the coffin. *Shrugs* It's something I don't usually think about...what was my answer in that poll. Hmm. But my relatives would never do that; and they would think I was being crazy if I said it...

I would opt for Organ Donation, with cremation for the remnants...

My ashes (which are actually the ground up bone material left after cremation) are to be mixed into various paints and a painting of me to be made and hung somewhere tasteful.

I liked the idea of a chess set made from one's bones... but I think I prefer the painting idea for me.

Ooh, I like that. A friend of mine's an artist, as is my sister - wonder if they'd appreciate that

Yes, I paint on occassion, and I find that brushes made from hair are quite often of very high quality--better than nylon ones. I've used camel hair brushes, but never human hair. I'm sure your hair would make for excellent brushes.


I never used to want to be cremated, for fear of being burned alive. However, I then realized that I would choose being burned alive over being buried alive anyday. Cremation is also more attractive to me, because I don't like the rottingness and worms that occur underground.


Oooohhh... I like this idea better than garden fertilizer.

I don't know - it's pretty coarse hair. I'm sure it would be inadequate for a fine brush - the kind of brush I always preferred to paint with, back when I painted (nothing serious, just miniatures). I think it'd be good for a big brush, though.

Well then you ought to keep your hair in good condition, so that it can be used all the more easily. Chances are that the thinner hair around your temples would be used. By old age most of your hair fibres will be finer anway.

Oh, good point, it will be finer. Though it may get brittle, too...hmm. I don't really have a lifestyle conducive to long life, but I should live long enough for that to happen.

I wonder about my skin, though...the skin becomes looser, which is better from the parchment point of view, but also more translucent and less tough...I also hear that human skin doesn't hold ink very well. I'll have to look into that.

Tell that to all the primary school children who come home with blue arms. I don't know what your skin's like, but mine's pretty absorbant. Perhaps you need to write on it before you die.

That's different for two reasons. Firstly, I'm talking about parchment made from human skin. Secondly, I'm talking about long-term - as in, years.

I like that idea...then maybe some evil scientist will use me in some incideous plan to destroy the world with some kind of insideous death ray like device....that'd be interesting

I hope for cremation, and illegial scattering at the beach in Santa Cruz.

There's always the option of having it tattooed on your back and then having it flayed off to be framed. I believe the Japanese used to do something like that? In fact I think they have a museum dedicated to it...

*off to check her facts*

Yeah, I thought of that, but don't tattoos fade? Hmmm.

(random fact: in Japan you're not allowed into public baths if you have tattoos)

They do fade - but you can have them topped up every few years (I've had my back piece for about 5 years now and just had a top up) to keep them fresh.

The other thing is that with better equipment and inks nowadays they're designed to last longer.

I'm that much older than you and likely to kick it before you do - ask me again in about 50 years.

Becuase tattoos are strongly associated with organized crime in Japan. Although that's an old stereotype that's fading.

[/off topic]

Yep. Nobody wants a gang war breaking out in their public baths.

And it's my thread and I'm a mod, I can be as off-topic as I want.

I've created a monster!!



Hmm... I think I'd like to be buried under a big statue of myself. Probably next to Nelson's Column in London. Of course, I expect, San Francisco, Toyko, The Vatican, and a few other places might want me too...

If I were you, I'd be buried somewhere I could rise from easily in three days' time...

Aww...brown-noser...

I like that painting idea. And illegal ash-scattering I would find funny. I know for sure my organs are out - heck, I almost needed a liver transplant. And what if I did? It was only a matter of time that I didn't. So yes, suck out my organs. I'd like to have scientists study my brains. I wish my bones could be kept, but cremate the rest and sort of make it into that painting...and the paintbrushes used could be from my bones and hair. COOL.

Goodness knows what my family will think... We're Jewish, so that may not go over well.

I don't think it really matters. I'd like my family or friends to decide what would happen to my body after I die. I'm not going to be inhabiting it anymore, and whatever makes them feel the best, whether it be cremation, burial, sky rendering, selling for parts, or donating organs whatever would give them the most comfort, that's what I'd want them to do. It's not as if I would really care or know at the time anyways. They'd be the ones that would live on and have to deal with the death, whatever is the most convenient, and whatever makes them feel the best is what I'd want. Wrap me in newspaper and throw me out with the trash if it suits them

Just an old joke about how infuriatingly patient and understanding the man is

Yeah, yeah... we believe you

I'd consider the possibility of being eaten. I have no favourite place as such, and I think burial is a waste of space. Plus, it'll give the guests at the wake something to eat and won't cost a load of money in catering!





I'd probably be cremated, though.

Yeah, well .... The English never really did learn to cook, did they ...

What's the old French saying? God sends us meat and the Devil sends us English cooks?

Yeah, Jaq, now that I think about it, that may be a better idea.

Thanks for bringing that up.

Let's just hope I won't have to worry about it being my funeral any time soon.

taylor="we could've crossed the street a while ago!"
me="well excuse me I don't feel like jaywalking because I don't feel like getting run over by a car today!"
taylor="let's hope you never do..."

Don't they fade because skin cells are being replaced? Once you're dead there's no replacement of old material, so the problem shouldn't occur.

I thought that the ink went under the skin. Other wise they would fade in like, a week.

Maybe the cells under the skin get replaced more slowly - over a decade or so? I know there are different rates of replacement for different types of cell.

I could find that out for you, but I'm lazy. The histology text is waaaaay over there. Oh, okay, fine. Give me a second.

Okay, the epidermal cells are those cells which are constantly being replenished, so if you were to stain them, you would loose the tattoo within a matter of days. The dermal tissue layer is much more stable, meaning the tattoo is practically permanent.

I really doubt that it has to do with the ink sinking into the skin. I can't think of a physiological reason as to why that would occur.

The inks mostly fade because of light exposure. Like any painting, dyes fade when exposed to light. That's why tattoos on exposed skin fade more than those on skin that is usually kept hidden.

True.

So rather than having your skin inked before your death, Commie - if you could have the tattoo done AFTER your death - then theoretically it could still hold true?

Plus it will be a good test to make sure you're dead. If you feel something, shout. Waking up in a coffin is one thing, but waking up in several different houses? Urgh.

I've often quite fancied the idea of having my brain preserved in a large bell jar, and then used as a prop in cheap sci-fi horror movies. It'd be nice to give something back to a genre that has amused me so much in the past...

Other than that, being catapulted into the sea would be quite spectacular. Especially if I had fireworks strapped to me. Wheee!

In reality, I don't rightly care. Skin me, stuff me, burn me, bury me, eat me... whatever.

As for Commie's hair - could it be used to stuff something? A small cushion, or maybe a soft toy? I could just imagine a small teddy bear stuffed with your hair in the hands of a newborn relative.