Mata likes to soak bums in gasoline and stub out his cigarette on them. Oh shizer, I better move back up North!

Mata can fly.

Mata and Eminem are homies from back in the day.

Mata put me in a box for a while, so I couldn't post messages.

I thought that's what it was.

Mata wears his sunglasses at night. And he's not blind.

mata runs his own tattoing company is his attic.

with old needles.

(shudder)

Mata eats ramen bricks between two slices of breat with jam and honey.

Mata is actually a rogue pixel, out to conquer the world by rearranging computer screens, throught the world...

Mata's hungry like a wolf.

Mata's turning Japanese, I think he's turning Japanese, I really think so...

Just like the media...

Mata has vivid fantasies about Robert Smith (The Cure) and Michael Stipe (REM).

Mata is comfortably numb

Mata is really nothing more than a brain in a jar connected to a computer. The Mata in the pictures and at the meets is just his little elf slave.

Mata ran, he ran so far away...

Mata chews the ends of other people's pens.

On a similar theme, Mata is also filthy/gorgeous

Mata comes in the night and spreads mechanical mouse gunk (the icky stuff that gets on the rollers and makes them all jerky) on peoples desks with a butter knife.

Equally, Mata is 'UK Bonus Tracks Intermission'.

Hmm...

Mata invented the DVD.

Mata invented those annoying li'l Japanese books you see people carrying into places, apparently for the sole purpose of leaving it on a table or bench.

Mata was an extra in Friends, he was in the background whilst Joey said "How you doin'?" (look close, he is on the left)

I rather think Mata can see tits on the radio

/scissorsisters

Mata gets a royalty, every time a company prints the line, "Batteries not included".

You'd better count your fingers after shaking hands with mata.

Mata goes to the zoo to slap around the monkeys (But not the gorillas...)

Mata's animation ideas were actually taken from stories that Mata's microwave used to tell him. It's truuuuuuue.

Mata draws with squid ink

Mata hangs Ostrich eggs in his car like others hang fuzzy dice.

Mata starred in "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" when it was still at the Roxy theatre... he played Riff Raff... with a Scottish accent.

Mata supplied all the kids in the Daddy day care movie

Mata has his own troop of flying monkeys, so be nice to him!

Mata is actually a world-known tap dancer who was forced into hiding due to an accident involving pickle jars.

Mata raises telepathic Penguins

Mata isn't a human, in fact, he is a psuedo intelligent internet bot.

Mata invented the Internet.

There are actually 3 Matas. Two of them are identical, but the third is a short, hairy gnu with bad teeth. If you ever meet Mata in real life, its almost certainly the gnu in disguise.

Mata wears comical t-shirts with slogans that take you until you get home to get the joke.

This is a rumour?

Mata makes up stories about people on his forum

Mata and Mr Fuzzy keep the Mods locked up in a cupboard in Mata's basement where they make them fight in tournaments

Mata gets his ideas from a miniture giant space hampster named 'Boo'.

Mata's animations are only used to distract us while his hordes of faithful flying monkeys steal our underwear.

Mata lives in my closet.

Mata is my closet.

Mata ate all the clothes in my closet.

Mata survives on a steady diet of clothing and ketchup.

Mata is as anatomically impaired as a Ken Doll.

Mata actually has a monkey write all his responces to the forum