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Snugglebum the Destroyer
Welcome to my harem. smile.gif

Please, take a cushion and let me explain the rules.

It goes like this - if you would like to become part of my very exclusive harem you start your post with 'Please Mistress'. You then need to give me a reason why you feel you would be beneficial to this establishment. If I feel that you would be suitable for a much coveted position, then you will be added to my sig V.

In return you get the following benefits:

A pretty outfit. *holds up a series of scarves made from gossamer thin mesh*
Fed and watered on a regular basis.
An exercise wheel.
To share a room with many other lovelies.
Pocket money.

There is also the added bonus that all rooms are equipt with it's own shallow pool and fountain, many cushions in shades of red (for languishing), huge bowls of fruit and a guarenteed Sinbad attack at least once a fortnight. biggrin.gif

Enjoy. biggrin.gif
El Nino
*walks in* I don't think I should be in here

Thanks for the cushion though

*takes some fruit too and leaves*
markslut
Please Mistress
Xkitsurabamix
Please mistress...
I'm a geisha, and geishas are perfect in a harem happy.gif
I can dance and play instruments, and i'm awfully good at putting thick white makeup on.
Snugglebum the Destroyer
Wow a Geisha and Markslut!! This harem is going to rock! biggrin.gif

I mean...

Markslut - You're definately acceptable to this harem purely on the merits of your fantastic dress sense.

xkitsurabamix - Geishas are always welcome. However, you're on probation - steal Irish from under my nose will you. A woman scorned and all. wink.gif

*pulls back beaded curtain to the inner sanctum*

Enjoy!!

I'm afraid I'm rather aloof and tend to neglect my charges. There's a pile of sex toys in the corner. biggrin.gif
Xkitsurabamix
*wimpers* but Vic is myyy hunny-bunny happy.gif
Ashbless
And he looks good in a purple fuzzy codpiece! laugh.gif

Hehehe *snaffles a cushion and a few grapes and also legs it*

Thannkkkss Snuggeleless!!!
Black-Wings
Please mistress...
I rule the world biggrin.gif No.. actually I just rule.. but you know what I mean...

Anyway.. what does harem mean?... (I'm a bit dumb.. heh)
Phyllis
Please mistress....since I'm a single girl now I can lavish ALL of my affection onto you! biggrin.gif And uhm....I can cook?

Been a long time since I joined any e-club type things.
Spacehappy
QUOTE (Snugglebum the Destroyer @ Nov 12 2004, 11:06 PM)
An exercise wheel.
*


That put me right off it. dry.gif
mooooooooooopo
Please mistress,

I have great languishing skills and um...kinkyness biggrin.gif.
Daedalus
Please mistress,

You can play with my beard tongue.gif
Xkitsurabamix
Ooh, Daedalus has a beard? *Sets up a special cushon for him beside her*
The Lorax
Please Mistress,

I'm a cheeky young girl, who eventhough she adores Vic, is well aware that he was yours first

QUOTE
*wimpers* but Vic is myyy hunny-bunny


and I would never take the lovleyness that is Vic from you. Furthermore, I too have an appreciation for Kaori Yuki's work(your avi is Setsuna from Angel Sanctuary) as do I.
franken-sarah
Please Mistress,

May I be part of your gossamer clad harem??

*giggles* Oh, I like this dominatrix stuff!! ph34r.gif
Xkitsurabamix
Snugglebum didn't know who setsuna was...i had to explain that 'she' was a 'he' and that he was not, in fact, trying to escape from her flooding kitchen.
I had to explain the setsuna/sarah situation, too.
I am the Kaori Yuki fan, dearie.

And i put a flag in Vic. he has a big 'Peoperty of Manji' flag impaled through his tummy.
happy.gif
Alien_Moe
An excersize wheel!!! I want an exersize wheel!!!!!

But I dont think i'd quite fit in in a harem, maybe as a visitor but not a member sad.gif

*unhooks the wheel and rolls off into the sunset*
Snugglebum the Destroyer
QUOTE
Snugglebum didn't know who setsuna was...i had to explain that 'she' was a 'he' and that he was not, in fact, trying to escape from her flooding kitchen.
QUOTE
had to explain the setsuna/sarah situation, too.


You're right, didn't have a clue. Just really liked the picture. My, don't I feel like a moron now? dry.gif

*hands out gossamer outfits to all, checks that plenty of oil is laid out, disciplines xkitsurabamix and feeds the hamster*

QUOTE
You can play with my beard


*strokes beard*

Only because you said I could and just once. I've seen what Snoo does to people who mess with her man. blink.gif

*puts Daedalus in a special room reserved jjust for Snoo - it has a mirrored wall*
The Lorax
QUOTE
I am the Kaori Yuki fan, dearie.


I love you.
snooodlysnoosnoosnoodle
yay a Dan specially packaged just for me smile.gif

I wub.gif you snuggles!!!
Xkitsurabamix
Sorry, i realize that sounded snippier than i meant it *bows head* sorry, mistress!
*offers Cookie of Apologies*
Snugglebum the Destroyer
*accepts cookie and lets xkitsurabamix out to play with the others*

Any more takers?


We've just had a pool table installed on the second floor sauna room?
Xkitsurabamix
*smiles and feeds Snugglebum grapes*
Artemisia
Please, please, PLEASE, mistress?

I give really good massages, come with my own satsuma-scented massage oil (non edible, however sad.gif ) and make great cheesecake!
El Nino
A pool table! Me bagsy. Who's challenging?
Ashbless
Oi B.I.C.!

I think you have to join the harem to play on/with the pool table. wink.gif biggrin.gif

*stops in to return dry cleaned cushion. Hopes it being near the wooden menace hasn't tainted it with evil*

*admires people in gauzy outfits*

*wanders back out again*
El Nino
Ah forget it then I'll just go find a bar somewhere then.
Ashbless
You sure? There are a lot of attractive people and I'm sure you'd look stunning in red gauze. tongue.gif
Cath Sparrow
Please Mistress
may I join your harem I know I have usefull skill I just cant think of them at the moment! mellow.gif *thought it would be better to wait till after the wedding before applying*
Snugglebum the Destroyer
For pure culinary genius, Artemisia is in!!

Cath, just goes without saying as I understand your nighttime attire is something else entirely!!! (come on Fuzzy with pictures biggrin.gif )

*pulls back beaded curtain*

Oh look, you're just in time for the random Sinbad invasion!! He's very good you know, my guards haven't managed to catch him yet. Duck!

*big burly guard flies past*

Tsk! Just can't get the staff nowadays.

*reclines on chaise lounge to be fed grapes by xkitsurabamix and fanned gently by Artemisia and Cath*
Cath Sparrow
*duck low flying guard and procceeds to fan Snuggle*
Wyvern
Please Mistress

If I may be so bold as to request admittence to your hallowed domain.

I am trained in the art of lingerie fitting so can aid your hareem in looking its finest for your visits.
I also come in a handy pocket size for easy storage am house trained and skilled with the art of massage, oils and erotic spiced wedding cookies. Should you desire proof of these skills please recap the recent unions of Mr and Mrs Commie's and Teapots.

*curtsies low* I would be forever humbled and honoured even if you see me as merely fit to lurk isolated in corners.
saucy_tara
Please Mistress,




I CAN LAPDANCE biggrin.gif wink.gif
Oh, and if you ever want hair extensions I'm pretty nifty at em. And your little boy can play with my little boy! So I'd be a handy babysitter as well.
Snugglebum the Destroyer
Yea Gods!!! Tara's in my harem!!!

*practically wets herself and hands over the keys*

Course you're in!!! (that was far too many exclamation marks but I think the occasion warrants it just this once)

Wyvern, I've seen you in action and I think you'd be a valuable member of the harem.

*hands out gossamer outfits. Taras is particularly small*


QUOTE
Oh, and if you ever want hair extensions I'm pretty nifty at em.


Ahem, I was going to corner you about that at Ultraviolence. blush.gif
saucy_tara
Lol cool it will be great to meet you smile.gif And thanks for the small costume, tis lovely *floats away in small gossamer and rubber number* wink.gif
JimiJimi
Please Mistress...

I have no idea what the hell a 'harem' is but I thought I'd try it out for the heck of it because I want the wheel and to be fed and watered...

Stop looking at me...

Please...

Mmm... delicious crime...


Sorry.




The Pinball Wizard is deaf, dumb and blind you know...
JimiJimi
*Holds up gun*

Give me the wheels, Snugglebum!

That sounds so uncool.

Sorry.




The Pinball Wizard plays by sense of smell you know...
Wyvern
QUOTE
Wyvern, I've seen you in action and I think you'd be a valuable member of the harem. 


I shall endeavour to be worthy of your expectations! Any requests Mistress for yourself or for fellow hareem members?

*Dons gossamer outfit, admires. Wonders over to cushions and settles down to await instructions, oils at the ready!*
Xkitsurabamix
*Does some funky alterations and walks in with a new gossamer outfit- - -only this time, it's a kimono*
Woo. Ninja seamstress skills.
mooooooooooopo
*languishes seductively and awaits instructions from the great Snugglebum*
PsychWardMike
Please Mistress...

I'm not particularly choosy (read: bisexual) and I have recently been called "the best lay I've ever had" by a girlfriend. I'm adventurous and a decent amount of fun, not to mention VERY flexible.
Snugglebum the Destroyer
Oooookay - JimiJimi, um, er, you're in on the assumption you put the gun down. Slowly...

QUOTE
have recently been called "the best lay I've ever had" by a girlfrie


Did you get that in writing? That's the sort of thing you want to put on your CV, you know. biggrin.gif

*hands Mike an outfit*

Okay, Wyvern and Moop - take Mike and show him around, get him fed, oiled and test his flexibility. Give JimiJimi a valium, I'm off to the pub. wink.gif
Daedalus
QUOTE (Snugglebum the Destroyer @ Nov 14 2004, 11:43 PM)
*puts Daedalus in a special room reserved jjust for Snoo - it has a mirrored wall*
*


sad.gif It gets lonely in here... can I join the fun? Pleeeeeeaaaaaaase?
Snugglebum the Destroyer
QUOTE
It gets lonely in here... can I join the fun? Pleeeeeeaaaaaaase?


I need a consent form from your beloved. wink.gif
Fallen Element
Please Mistress.

I can bellydance! I'm flexible (in EVERY sense of the word) and have no problem being used in some cunning and kinky scheme!

And. And. I like similar books to you! We can read things to each other while I dance (scantily clad) in the backround. I will also feed you grapes and other assorted goodies!


Fal xXx
Wyvern
QUOTE
Okay, Wyvern and Moop - take Mike and show him around, get him fed, oiled and test his flexibility.  Give JimiJimi a valium, I'm off to the pub.  wink.gif


As you wish Mistress.

*Doses JimiJimi and oils for good measure* biggrin.gif

Right next task, Ooo, so much potential!
*Checks Mikes garment for fit and makes necessary adjustments to enhance impact*

Hmm, so many choices where to begin?
Any suggestions Moop? Although I can think of a few! tongue.gif

*cracks open the oils and begins applying thoroughly to Mike whilst assessing flexibility*
Black-Wings
Please Mistress....

I can play you lots of music.... and sing.. and I have a large collection of opium incense sticks... mmmmm.....
mooooooooooopo
*attaches leash to mike and shows him around*
JimiJimi
Mmm... Valium... And a wheel... Valiumy Wheel...

Thanks for the membership!

Oh yeah, the gun...

*Puts gun back into hiding place ready to take out* Heh heh...







The pinball wizard likes Valiumy Wheels you know...
Snugglebum the Destroyer
Ohhhh, reading AND dancing - aren't you just a kinky little multi - tasker!! wink.gif

*hands Fallen gossamer outfit and directs to the podium*

*hands JimiJimi outfit and chains to the exercise wheel*
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