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acid_rain_child
I dunno, I try to be a poet, sometimes it works, other times it doesn't. Go ahead, tear me a new hole, everyone:

Father,

Win me over, clever lies
Make me believe it's real
I'll be there at the end of the night.

Resurrect like the Holy Son
My dead body waste
I'll be there at the end of the night.

Your calculated kind words and silver promises plagued with tarnish
Blind my senses so
I'll be there at the end of the night.

Marionette, I have a painted smile
Knot my strings, lock me in the dark again
I'll be there at the end of the night.

Cripple me with fear
Starve me with my own barren spine
I'll be there at the end of the night.

Inside. Always inside.
My soul sucked swollen my rotted lips.
You and I both know
I'll be there at the end of the night.
)DonkeyRoo(
i liked it alot, its really deep, well done biggrin.gif
Apollyon
Wow. That imagery is really powerful. I'm not sure I understand what the poem is about though...

It has great rhythm, and great metaphor, and.... wow. Just beautiful. The first few lines especially captivated me.

But the metaphor had no internal logic (not to sound wierd or anything). Maybe I just don't get it?
acid_rain_child
Wow, I haven't even checked to see if anyone even read this!

The poem itself is a daughter's... cry for help? journal? letter? maybe just poem? to her father. A poem about rape without being angsty and all "I hate you, blah blah blah." I try not to make crap poetry like that. If I hadn't told you, you wouldn't have known what the narrarator was talking about, but that's one of my favorite things about poetry is that each of our own person experiences shapes what we take from poetry. It doesn't have to be about rape, it could be about someone simply taking the life out of someone else with their mere existance. I live with that every day, sadly.

I really enjoyed this poem, so I entered it to my school's paper and whatnot, and wanted to know what people here thought. This is one of the poems that wrote itself, and the specific meaning came to me the same way, it's sort of hard to explain. I'm glad you liked it, thanks smile.gif
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