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So, after only 11 breakups (each of which drove me into a dark pit of despair with pain deeper than I have ever felt), moop and I have decided to tie the e-knot.

If this doesn't succeed, I will surely cry and cry, and then cry some more because I can't sleep due to a sopping wet pillow.

So, come one, come all, and be prepared to whine.

Bride present.
And I, your sniffly maid of honor, wish you all the luck in the world that has evaded you. May you no longer spiral into the deep, deep, black hole of misery. *sob*
This is right. Me and candice were meant to be together. She's not like all the other girls - she won't go off and sleep with my brother after 3 days. Oh the pain. The torment. The depravity.

This wedding must succeed, to put an end to all the hurt and despair in my miserable life.
Cath Sparrow
Oh! My beloved lost souls the pain it would drive through me if this binding does not hold would be to much to bear. So as your Preistess I beg you not destroy me.

The Preistess present
*hobbles in brandishing a shenis*

Oh, woe is me. Foever the best man, never even a bridesmaid. But I'm here for my tormented friends *breaks down in tears*

Best man and shenis are here
Usurper MrTeapot
*enters with emo fringe*

I weep for those about to cry to my poetic words. I'm Tearpot, a solo artist with a standing band Farewell Weather.

-A Minor-
I don't deserve your attention. Please, just don't look at me, I'll just let you down... I'm not even fit to be human.. I'll just sit here, on cand's head, a tattered remnant of my soul.. A veil.
*Weeps into the carpet, clutching the all precious glass of booze to numb the horror of the existence.. and the tragedy just waiting in the things.*
Usurper MrTeapot
- B Flat Major -

Emptyness is my hall of happy memories
May this occasion be the first
I'm glad you arrived in a limo
For I arrived in a hurst.
Cath Sparrow
My tear stainded darlings we gather here to forever tie these tourmented and tattered soul together. Some will feel forsaken some will feel neglected but all here know these to were ment tobe.
*ruthlessly gatecrashes*
" "

......naked. And crying.
*Sneaks in with a bottle of Jack Daniels and lurks amonst the roof beams with a super-soaker*

*Titters and sways quietly*
Usurper MrTeapot
Here comes the bride
She should watch her step
Shards of broken heart lie scattered 'cross the floor


I'm so lonely. sad.gif
QUOTE (elphaba2 @ May 24 2005, 10:40 PM)
" "

......naked. And crying.

Yep, now you have my attention. Yeppity Yep.
*sobs silently, making candice's head soggy* Such is my curse.. Am I to be forever denied true love? Can I only watch it from afar? Oh, I pray for a top hat to come rescue me from this ever-widening pit, this hole in my existence...
*sigh* Woe is me, forever alone, drowned in my tears. and Ooh, what a pretty ring... its beauty is the beauty my life could never possess... siiiiiiigh...
Cath Sparrow
moop oh misunderstood and transient being will take this tearfull and woefull soul Cand to be your soul mate to poetically accompany tear fully dream over till your souls are tourn asunder at the end of eternity?
Omg i just want to die,
slit my wrists and
release the blood that surges
round my aching soul.

So depressed am i,
so so i cant even use punctuation
and write poetry to cleanse my
soul with acid

*single tear*
I do! I do!

Long were the days when I though my eternal single life would never end. The joy is sweeping through my soul, tearing the darkness asunder. I've never felt this way before. So estatic, so unnatural. I think I'm going to cry.

*collapses in a sobbing heap and clings to the brides feet*
*cries large black tears that drip onto her shenis and stain it black, the same color as her heart*
Usurper MrTeapot
I live the life you dream, but dream the life you live
Today I want to forget, forget that you said yes
And now each day grows shorter, and the nights seem so much longer
I'm standing here when I could be lying there with you

I can't deny it so I'll just confess it, I can't understand it so I'll just accept it...

*emo pose*
Trample my dreams to peices
Tears mix with my gushing blood
I wallow in a pit of feces
Can't form a smile, I never could

Woe is me
QUOTE (trunks_girl26 @ May 24 2005, 10:49 PM)
*cries large black tears that drip onto her shenis and stain it black, the same color as her heart*

My tears are tears of blood and pain! I demand justice! I demand to feel cold steel slice through my flesh n' stuff.

Cath Sparrow
*cath stands with tears streaming down face tissues scatter like dead roses around her*

And Cand oh tearfull and woefilled soul do you take this misunderstood and transient being moop as your soulmate to cherish for eternity and grieve on his grave till you join him if he forsakes this plain before you?
I personally know neither the bride nor the groom, but may their woe-filled days be not filled with the agony and despair that have so long cluttered mine, but that perhaps a slim ray of sunshine may for an infinitely small moment, fall like blood into their lives.
Usurper MrTeapot
i went to the zoo and saw some monkeys
i went to the zoo and saw some monkeys today
i saw the giraffe but he didn't make any sound

and... you know what
time is... it's the closet for me - the closet for me
it's so dark me cannot see
it's the closet for me - the closet for me
Mr. Harry said that will teach me

...sorry. Mental lapse. Curse my emo bad luck.

He....he's staring at Sarah's bottom! I can't believe you, moop. Clearly you are having an AFFAIR with my MAID OF HONOR!

*weeps dramatically*

THE WEDDING IS OFF!!!! *slits moop's throat*

Instead I bring you this poem I wrote about our love affair. It meant so much to me, it lasted a whole 5 weeks, after all. Well, off and on, anyway.

Twelve breakups now
Somehow I must go on.
But my soul is spiralling into a dark pit of darkness
All because moop is a dirty bastard.

I weep endless tears of infinite sadness.
And though I hate him,
I would still die for him
No one understands.

I shall watch the death of my friend's soul as I sit here stained and broken like my one and only true friend- my shenis.

*watches moop's blood flow like so many tears over her heart of sorrow*
Oh no! But... it must have been just because there was something ON my bottom... another relationship falls apart before my eyes, and I'm the cause...

*weeps for hours*
Nyooo! Once again blackness fills my soul. I'm such a failure - I can let myself down with the smallest if eyespasms. Woe is me!




OMG! Not again! Your wedding dress! I got blood on it. I'm such a failure. I love you candice, will do for the rest of my short life, but I'm just not good enough for you. Look what I've *gurgle

*collapses on the floor*

*croaks* I'm sorry. Find someone else. Someone who won't let you down. You deserve...

*goes silent and bleeds profusely while clawing at ankles*

OMG! He loves me! What have I done?!!??!!

*frantically bandages moop's neck*

You're forgiven! I love you too! I know till death do us part may not be terribly long now, what with the throat slitting and all, but what do you say we get back together...again? Without you my life is meaningless! Those 5 minutes were agony! ;_;

To answer Cath....I do!
If by dying I will do you further damage then I must yearn to live. Fight through the pain and despair that life brings, all for you, all that you may one day be brightened by even the faintest glimmer of happyness. That alone justifies my existance in this futile empty remorseless world.

*gets up looking suprisingly healthy*
This is wonderful! This is such a happy day! Yaaay!

But I'll never have one like it... *tear*

I give my sunshiney days to the happy couple!
Oh woe! As some insignificant tormentor before me has his throat cut, my lacy exterior is stained with the still-warm blood of agony! Why must I suffer this way? Why must everthing I try be stained with the dark crimson of failure?

And now, if that wasn't enough to shatter my soul, I see love being rekindled, a love such as I will never experience... It's not fair!
Cath Sparrow
Oh this tragic sene must be caputured!!

*starts painting badly on the wall useing moops blood as paint*

Oh! Oh! the ceromony!

I now bind you two tragic and tourmented souls together till de....... for eternity. We will consumate this binding in blood *pulls pen knife from some where in flowing robes* hhmmmm well we seem to have a cut on the groom already *takes cands wrist* hmmmmm where to fit this between the scars aaahhhh! here will do *slashes Cand's wrist* Ooops may have been a bit to enthusiastic there..... If you place your wound to his to let your blood interming and your souls entwine I will pronouce you Bound forever!
*weeps at the beauty of Cath's painting*

*places wound up to moop's*

Oh, Lovebucket, I'm so....well, I'm still deeply tormented and full of angst, but I think I can almost smile! wub.gif
Schnookumbunnykins, your angst is now forever mine and mine forever yours, and I think the church gets a share of the angst too now thanks to being coated in my mournful vitae.

May these scars ever mark our binding of tormented souls bereft of joy.

*corners of mouth twitch for a second*

*single tear*
Cath Sparrow
Now if some poor soul will pass me the rings so there buety can be used as a symbol of the tie these tearfilled creatures have sworn to each other.....
Here... *hands over the rings*

I'm glad they have such devotion to each other... it's so beautiful... *blows nose on veil*
Another stain! *flails at Sarah, then collapses on cand's head and sobs* My tortured existence.. So worthless am I that I am used as a mere wiping cloth! Why do I even bother.. This mortal coil is the coil in a hob, and it scalds me as I sit upon it.
Cath Sparrow
*cath takes rings trying not to let them slip from her blood soaked hands* Oops!.... Eep!..... Eek!...... It's Ok I got em......
*passes one each to Cand and moop before she drops them*
With these rings that symbloise eternity you will show your eternal love for one and other *tries not to slip on the blood on the floor* you have exchanged your vows your blood and now these tokenso of your love. *slips over on to floor* Damit!!! It'll cost a fortune to get these cleaned! Oop's!
*carefully slips bloodsoaked ring onto moop's finger*

Oh, Poodlecakes! I was clearly empty until now. If you ever leave me, I will die, then come back to life, then die again just for that extra dramatic twist.
*inserts dripping ring onto cand's fingers and sucks off the excess blood to make sure it doesn't slip off*

Darlingsnugglebumpkins, this ring is the eternal symbol of how our dark souls are encoiled. If it ever leaves your sight my death shall be the slowest and most painful yet known to man. Not a death of physical pain but of mental destruction. Forever may we share our angst and pain and may we live for ever in this sorry state until we leave this plane of existence for one where we are better understood.
Cath Sparrow
Right there's a grave yard out back you may now go comsumate your eternal binding on one of those! or in other words you may now hump the bride!

*wanders off to weep into her bottle of Absinth*
I imagine that will be quite traumatizing for the veil!

edit: oh, whoops, forgot to weep.

*Sweeps bride off her emotionally unstable feet and carries outside for the traditional graveyard SMEXING*

Snooglepie? Do you think this ring makes me look ugly? I feel ugly. And alone. And hollow. Oh, no one is as tormented as me!

Oh, right, the SMEXING. *is carried off outside so that our souls may be joined together and our pain will become one and our heavy hearts will beat in unison or somesuch thing*
No, definitely not. The ring reflects and amplifies the beauty of the inner pain and suffering you've been through.

The emptyness will subside. Once our souls are one we will be forever entwined, to share each others pain until the end (probably when we kill each other in the next argument).
*flees in terror*

How cruel my fate is! Cast to the sodden earth, by my own hand no less... I shall remain here, slowly decomposing due to natural mechanisms, like bacteria, woeful bacteria. I shall gather cobwebs and be trodden into the dirt..

Let my crumbling form be a caveat to all who would try their hand at being part of wedding party.. Let them know they can save themselves from my sorrowful existence... Let my death not be in vain...

*camera slowly zooms out to reveal the stricken form of the veil in a vast wilderness, then darkness envelopes the scene*

*credits roll in*
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