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So. I feel a little weird talking about this since I've been gone so long - three years ago, I'm sure I would have started this topic a lot sooner, but ya know. I'm SHY. Or not.

I found an abnormal mass in my, uh, chest. Ya know. So I tried to make an appointment with my regular doctor, who is female. She couldn't fit me in until January, so I opted to go to a more local (but male) gyno.

So I go to the office Friday, make an appointment with one of the doctors there, we'll call him Dr. B. I specifically chose Dr. B because my roommate had gone to the other doctor at the clinic, call him Dr. G, and she told me that he had a really flirty bedside manner, and I'm sorry, I don't wanna be flirted with by the person that's going to be feeling up my chest and sticking probes into my ladyparts.

So I had my appointment with Dr. B, but today, after I told the nurse what I was there for, I was examined by Dr. G.

The only reason I can think of for them to swap doctors would be if one specialised in gynecology and one in obsterics. But when I made the appointment, the receptionist was told clearly that I was a new patient and that I didn't know either doctor, so I think she would have clarified the matter for me.

My roommate had been telling the truth - not only was a female nurse present for the examination (I am curious as to whether that is typical in Mississippi, possibly a law?) but he was indeed "flirty." I am a tall woman, and I'm not used to looking up at anyone. Dr. G probably my height, and sitting as I was on the end of the examination table, he was perhaps three inches taller than me. He stood close enough that it was uncomfortable for me to look him in the face - within a foot of me, probably about four inches from my knees if not closer. Anyone who's studied psychology knows about the personal space boundaries.

Other than that, I think the examination was routine, however, I've never had a thorough breast exam - my usual doctor does a cursory check that rarely takes more than ten seconds per side.

All in all, it freaked me out a little, and I'm not sure if I should look into switching doctors or not. This is, after all, the first time I've seen a gyn for anything besides the yearly checkup.

... ._. helps?
Yes, switch doctors. I avoid a lot of specific doctors for just about the same reasons - I expect them to be friendly and make me comfortable, not breach any of my personal space or make me feel in any way awkward while I'm there. It's hard enough for a lot of women to go to a gyno or even get a physical exam, since most people have some kind of body issue whether it be disliking extreme closeness or insecurities, so to have someone that makes you feel comfortable? That's a need.

Otherwise, you'll probably spend an unnecessary amount of stress anticipating the visit every time you get ready to make one. Doesn't matter if it's a little or a lot - if it was a doctor that didn't have a bedside manner like that, there probably wouldn't be any.
If in doubt, always switch.

If you fancy being a being more active about this, see if you can have a conversation with a nurse at the clinic and have a quick chat about the doctor's body language. It's possible, given the daily intimate procedures that he must perform, that he's completely unaware of the personal space issues. Alternatively, he may think that he's helping things by making people feel more comfortable with being close to him by getting a head start before he begins the examination... Then again he could just be a twat without any sense of boundaries.

In other words, what Syuu said. smile.gif
QUOTE (Hyperion @ Dec 3 2007, 10:44 PM) *
not only was a female nurse present for the examination (I am curious as to whether that is typical in Mississippi, possibly a law?)

It's typical in all states. I think it might be a law, actually, that a nurse is present during pelvic exams.

If I were you, I'd blame George W. Bush. Yup. He clearly gave this doctor the wrong idea when he said: "We got an issue in America. Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYNs aren't able to practice their...their love with women all across the country." tongue.gif

In seriousness, I'd just switch. It's always important to feel comfortable around your doctor, and that's especially true of gynecologists. Being on your back in the stirrups is such a vulnerable position...I'd want to feel comfortable and trust whoever was poking around down there and feeling me up.

My own gyn, back in the US (err, haven't been to one over here yet) tends to make small talk at awkward moments. Like: *inserts speculum* "So, are you and your mom doing anything special for mother's day?" It always just kind of amused me, and I figured he was trying to make me feel more at ease. If it felt icky or flirty to me, I'd have changed doctors in a heartbeat.
The only time I have had any of my ladyparts... inspected by a doctor, it was for an ultrasound scan on my ovaries. The Doctor was really nice, and was just very clinical about it- which I think I prefer to if she was all "right... so... *inserts ultrasound think that kind of looks like a dildo* any plans for the summer?". It's less personal and less weird.
Yeah. The problem is, there's one clinic in my town - and that's it, as far as my insurance carrier goes. My usual doctor (who also is my mom's) is in a town about 45 minutes away, and she's the only female ob/gyn in the area, and she's more ob than gyn, thus the whole "booked till January" thing.

:/ OH. And the fishiness continues: Dr B. and Dr. G have the same qualifications. I'm thinking of taking my dad up there and having a chat with them about why I made an appointment with Dr. B but was examined by Dr. G.

They also have all these weird "Don't sue your doctor cause it's making it hard for doctors to practice" signs up. Legal action abuse or some shit.

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