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-TheKasbah-
Anyway, this is the first time I have really asked for any help online. So anyway, here's a little background to what I think led to a suppposed eating disorder.

After last summer, a lot of my friends started drinking a lot more and this really annoyed me because they were becoming really unreliable. Much like my dad had while he was an alcoholic, he walked out on my family. So that basically triggered like a depression sort of thing for around 5 months, maybe more of when I was constantly feeling down and harmed myself a few times when it was really bad.

During the 5 months I had stopped eating as much and lost a lot of weight and I also got semi-somnia which is a form of insomnia brought on by stress. Lately coming up to exams when I have been really stressed, I have stopped eating again, usually about one meal a day and possibly a few snacks because I usually feel sick f I eat any more than that. I am something like 2 stone underweight and I am constantly stressed. It's coming up to my GCSE's in a few weeks and for anyone outside the UK, they are pretty much the deciding exams for what the rest of my life is like, so I could be doing without all these problems.

So if anyone could help me with a) What I might have and b)How I can help get rid of it.
I don't like the idea of going to the doctors so that's pretty much ruled out for now.

Any help would be appreciated, thanks.
Daria
First bit of advice? GCSEs aren't the end of the world smile.gif Honestly, you'll get through them and look back, and think to yourself "Why on earth was I so worried?!".
Regarding your eating: if you feel able, you can slowly increase the amount you're consuming. It will probably be better for you to eat small, well balanced meals/ snacks than bigger meals because if your stomach is only used to a small amount of food then it will have shrunk a bit- so eating lots will make you feel horrid because your stomach is going "ARG! FOOD! YOU B*****D! TOO MUCH!" which won't help your brain into thinking that food is yummy and useful. Snacking on crisps, chocolate, fatty foods with lots of refined sugar will NOT help you put on weight and they will just muck up your body. Try fruit, raisins, trail mix, nuts, sunflower seeds (toasted sunflower seeds in marmite are delicious, if you like that sort of thing, and very nutritious as well). You can keep a little packet of them in your pocket, and if you feel like snacking, just munch on some. They have the good kinds of fats, omega oils and vitamins that will help your body stay healthy whilst it's being stressed. Also, omega oils help the brain!
If your body (stomach and brain) are happy with eating lots of little snacks during the day, then you can slowly increase the size of them, and so get your stomach more used to having food in it.
Regarding the stress aspect of things, which will be a MASSIVE factor in why your body is doing silly things: exercise is always good. It gets the endorphins running about in your bloodstream (happy chemicals produced by the brain), it keeps you fitter and is a great way to not-think-about-things when you just need a distraction. It will also help your body metabolise the food you are eating, and it should help your body get tired so sleep will be wonderfully refreshing. Also, you don't have to do anything spectacular: sit-ups are good, and can be done in the confines of your room if you are worried about people asking questions, or you could go out jogging/ running (although not good if you have old injuries in your legs or crappy tendons).

Masturbation can also be a good thing! Endorphins are also released upon orgasm, it clears your head and can help you feel more sleepy if you do it before bed. Stress does lower your sex drive, though, so it may be likely that you just don't feel like it.
You could try meditation, as well? It doesn't have to be sitting in the lotus position, chanting "Om" and burning incense- as long as you are comfortable, in a quiet place, and just focus on something with your eyes closed, it can help your brain figure out what's going on in your life and just settle everything into order a bit more. If you're finding yourself a bit overwhelmed with all you have to do (revision, homework, social life), writing lists can be marvelous! It gives you satisfaction to cross things off when you have completed them, and you can also see in an organised way what is actually floating about in your head and stressing you out.
Bach's Rescue Remedy could also help. It's a mixture of flower essences and brandy and water- whether you believe in homeopathy or not is kind of superfluous! When I was doing my A-Levels, I also suffered from insomnia, stress and I used to get shakey for no good reason (like when you have too much adrenaline running about). If you add a couple of drops of rescue remedy to a bottle of water, and drink it through the day, you might find that it can help calm you down, and help you relax. You can also put a drop under your tongue when you are really stressing out (my mum used to give it to us as kids if we'd just hurt ourselves or had a shock).

I'm afraid I'm all out of advice for anything closer to eating disorders. I've had a couple of friends who have gone through anorexia, and I just can't get my head round why they would want to just stop eating! Food is delicious and yummy and keeps you going. Perhaps if you cooked it yourself (not sure what the situation you have with your mum regarding cooking is but you could always offer to cook once or twice a week), you might be more enthused about food?

Let us all know how you're doing. You could always keep a food diary, noting down your emotions, work and exercise as well, thus keeping a track of things and showing yourself that you have Good Days.
Faerieryn
I would agree with everything that Daria says and I would add weight to her comment on GCSE's. I teach English to secondary school kids and once they are done they mean very little.

Focus on the GCSE's you need to pass to get yourself onto the next level of study. You will need English and Maths and ICT is good but other than that you only need 5 to get onto most 6th form courses- that is only 2 or 3 more (unless you do literature too which means that you only need one more!)

As far as eating goes have you told anyone about this? If controlling your eating is how you exhibit your stress this may become a habit in later life- you get stressed- you stop eating- so it is a good idea to tackle this now. Also if this effects your exam performance you can get dispensation. I had a migraine in an exam so they took my mock result. Explore all the avenues open to you.

Oh and BIG HUGS hunny bunch. we're all here for you- even if you just want to vent
-TheKasbah-
Thanks, I keep trying to eat but I was on the bus earlier with HALF A SANDWICH and I felt sick! I think it might be with the shrinking stomach as Daria said, but I never thought I would have to start eating stuff that small. I was eating like low fat crisp stuff earlier for lunch which didn't make me feel too bad and they were the healthy kind. I try to snack as much as possible because I know if I try to move on to meals too quick I will just end up throwing up which will leave me worse off than before.

As for the exercise I did plan to go walks with my best friend cause she realised I was really stressed but it seem to have failed and I don't see it happening. Plus when I do exercise I just feel faint cause the the lack of energy from not eating. And masturbation is actually quite hard for me before bed because I live in such a small house with a big enough family, therefore I share a room and my bed creeks when I even turn around, lol. I also have no idea where to get the stuff for Bach flower remedies except a shopping centre which I can rarely ever get to.

And it's not that I don't want to eat, it's just the sick feeling when I do overwhelms my hunger which stops me. I do cook every once in a while but not very often as it is usually make for me coming home meaning it would be late served if I tried other than weekend when I am always out or working. I might use the diary idea as I thought about it before but thought of it as stupid but now it's more serious I want to give everything a try.

And Faerieryn, it's not really that the exams are making me stressed, it's more that I don't eat which takes it's toll on my concentration which makes me think about how I am going to do in my exams which doesn't worry me as much because I already have one of the jobs I've always wanted without any exams being done.

I have only really told my friends about it and some of them are more supportive than others and I suspect a few think I am attention seeking by doing it rather than being serious, no one realised for a while as I always planned to take my one meal a day while others were around so they didn't kind of say, 'Why the hell does Gavin never eat?' and stuff like that. I'm going to try and ignore most of the things that really get me stressed and I hope that helps a bit, atleast until I get things like my exams out of the way. I might go back to my previous activities such as song writing, poetry, guitar etc. which I haven't done in a while and could help me get 'de-stressed'.

But it's good that I see people are trying to help because I usually kind of think people care and stuff when they do help which makes me try harder to get through the tough things such as depression and eating disorders.

So thanks for the help and I'll try to let yous know as often as I can about how I am doing etc. Thanks. =]
voices_in_my_head
I wouldn't call it an eating disorder, persay. Stress does weird things and causing people to eat way more or less than they usually would is one of them. I'd suggest trying to make your main meal breakfast instead of just one where you're around people. This way, you'll have more energy, and for longer, perhaps making it possible to go on those walks you had planned.

Also, don't rush it. I've had almost the exact same problem before and I know it's frustrating as hell to not be able to handle food like you used to. Take Daria's advice to heart, though - sugary foods are pretty much useless when it comes to getting your old appitite back, and could end up making you sicker to your stomach than a normal-sized meal might have at this point. A personal favorite of mine was trail mixes and other sorts of healthy snacks. It took awhile, but I'm now back to eating as I was before.

smile.gif Good luck, and be sure to keep us up to date!
-TheKasbah-
I might go have breakfast now which will be the first in a long, long time, ha ha. Last time I nearly threw up but I'll try again and hopefully I don't. =]

I'll be sure not to rush it as I don't want to throw up but I will try to keep some sort of healthy snack in my pocket at all times.
Smiler
Good idea. If you just try a little bit more within a regular pattern it may help; having a little breakfast will kick start the metabolism and should shift your body into deciding it's hungrier later in the day allowing for a little more as you're ready (it really is the most important meal wink.gif ). Also, with breakfast, you've got loads of options so you can have a little and build up as you can.

Keep us posted mate, you'll find a lot of sense and open ears on the forum and we have a wealth of experience. By talking to a couploe of friends and us you're already doing yourself some good.
-TheKasbah-
I managed to have two meals already, felt unbelievably sick but it passed in around an hour which wasn't bad. I'll try to eat something before going to sleep tonight. Thanks for the help. =]
freedom
when my son died 6 years ago i stopped eating threw grief din't even know if i had eaten or not

it got so bad that my blood pressure dropped threw the floor and i got irregular heart beat so had to be put on heart monitors and blood pressure tablets to bring it back up my weight dropped from 8 stone down to 5 in 3 months and i wasn't sleeping either

i do have low blood pressure any way but the grief / stress of that time paid its toll on my body

even now when i am stressed i stop eating and the thort os food makes my stomac churn but i do try and eat even if that feeling is there

the trick i use is little but often and for me it does work as my stomach doesn't feel full and uncomfortable

i know its not a nice thing to have and you feel you have no control you also know how it could turn out what i remember is that i am strong and i will beat it and i will stick two fingers up at it and have the last say

easier said than done at times but remember you are in control
-TheKasbah-
Haven't posted here in a while, but anyway, I've been eating more 'normal' which is still less than my friends but more than I was before so I've been pointed in the right direction by all of you guys =] So thanks again!
-TheKasbah-
FAIL! tongue.gif I went to the doctor a few days ago and found out that my weight hasn't improved much. Due to that, athsma should be worse & I will begin to get anxiety? Above this, they felt the need to suck out some blood on the claim that they think I might be diabetic. I doubt the last part as I reckon there is like some vampire living in the closet who they want to keep alive so they keep giving it peoples blood.

Postitive: I mentioned I think it was having an effect on concentration in exams and now I think that I get added percentage or something onto my results which could come in handy.
leopold
If you're not sleeping properly and losing weight, it's entirely possible you have diabetes. It's worth testing for just in case.
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