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voices_in_my_head
I was talking with one of my friends the other day about all the weird/funny things our parents and grandparents think or believe.

For example, My dad still refers to Texts as "e-mails".
My mom, when wanting to save her pictures off of the computer, asked me if I had a spare floppy disk for her to use. (My computer doesn't even have a floppy drive anymore...)
And best of all, My dad, when I asked him why he keeps the pantry so stocked for a family of three, responded that he thinks "everything's going to break down" in about six months, and our family will have enough food that we can easily board up the house and continue living comfortably. He also told me today that I should keep my job at McDonald's for as long as possible, so "when it all breaks down in six months" I'll be able to provide for the family. Why does he think this is going to happen? Because Obama is president. And he's a (quote) "Damned black socialist."

So what weird things have you heard come from the mouths of your parents/grandparents?
Yannick
My mom calls IMing texting.
Daria
My parents are pretty good with technology: my dad studied computer science at university in the 70s and so therefore my mum has always been surrounded by computery things, so there's not usually any funnies in that sense. (Although mum does freak out if I use cmd prompt on her computer.)

My granma, however, still calls my younger brother a "Little Turk" if he's being mischievious biggrin.gif
Hobbes
My dad always used to call the computer, "the machine," as if we had to shovel coal into a furnace to keep it runnign.

Also, my mother once went into an electric oven showroom and asked if they did any gas ones.
Slightly more embarassing: my mother, again, went in to a stationery shop to look for an eradicator pen (which allowed you to erase cartridge-pen ink). Unable to find one, she approached the counter and asked for an "erector pen". biggrin.gif
LoLo
My mom actually fixes computers and when she talks to me about what she does I rarely understand what it is she's talking about.

Now my grandma insists on calling facebook "spacebook" and calls at least once a month to get me to come fix her copy machine, which is actually an all in one scanner/copier/printer. Usually she's just turned it off and can't figure out how to turn it back on. I blame this on her losing her vision though, not on being a silly older person.

My other grandma, who I don't really talk to, but I can recall has always said "warsh" instead of "wash" and that's always given me a giggle.
gothictheysay
My comparative lit professor:

"Have you ever, for instance, downloaded a song from the Internet?"

Girl nods her head yes.

"Yeah, see, 'cause I don't know how to do that."

*class giggles a little*

"Hey! I have a Facebook!" (and he does; he keeps coming up on suggested for me) Also, when told there was some stuff that would be good for class on youtube, he said "Uh, i don't go on youtube much. Today I brought a videotape."

My dad's had a lot of funny ones as well, but they aren't coming to mind right now. My favorite was when he kept asking me how to use the new all-in-one printer, and all he had to do was hit one button that either scanned, copied, or printed. I told him he just had to hit like two buttons max, and he was like "No, you do it, I don't get it."
SPEAKERfortheLOST
QUOTE (Hobbes @ Sep 28 2009, 12:48 PM) *
My dad always used to call the computer, "the machine," ...


Totally thought about the Pink Floyd song Welcome to the Machine.

And for the things old people say:

"son of a fa-awa" <- phoneticly spelled as I have no idea what the real word is or what it means

"Put me in coach, I don't smoke" <- not entirely sure where it came from, but generally used before jumping into action of sorts

Others that I will post later...
Usurper MrTeapot
My dad just called the internet router a Webcam. I think he will always be calling it that from now on.
Hobbes
My ex's mum used to call texting, "blogging". This is because her new phone had a "blog it" function, and she was fairly quick to get her wires crossed as to what exactly it meant. Thus phrases like, "Blog me the details later," would come up regularly. Or, "I got a blog from so-and-so yesterday".
Yannick
...My mom isn't much older than most people on this forum, so what she just asked me was kinda.. uh.. weird. Facebook wasn't loading earlier, btw.
Mom: Does your internet work for music?
Me: I don't need the internet for music, that's what iTunes is for.
Mom: Oh.
Me: You fail at computers.
Mom: So teach me. Teach me how to download photos.
Me: Go to Google images, drag to desktop?
Mom: But how do they get on Google before I have them?
Me: ...What? Oh, do you mean upload photos? ..Plug it in and it does it for you.
Mom: Never mind. You're not explaining it well enough. Just do it for me.
Me: ...
Mom: I don't hear music btw.
Me: ...
Hobbes
^--- biggrin.gif

I used to have a lot of difficult explaining to my mum "where" emails were.

Mum: So where do they come from?
Me: Well... the person that writes them, clearly.
Mum: So... when I read the email, am I on their computer?
Me: No no, they send it to you.
Mum: So it turns up on our computer. What if it's turned off?
Me: No, you retrieve the email from a server.
Mum: Server?

...

Mum: How do they know its my computer getting it?
Me: Because of your password and username.
Mum: But I could type that on anyone's computer
Me: Yes, and you could get your email on anyone's computer.
Mum: But would I get their email as well?

... etc ...


Thinking back, I seem to remember the only way I could explain the system was to consider it as normal mail. IP addresses became postcodes, servers became sorting offices, and so forth.

To be fair, it can't be easy to understand and learn a whole new technology and "idea" that would never have ever even seemed possible just a few decades ago. I saw a video online the other day where a guy showed an iPhone and said, "If you could take the iPhone technology back in time, and show people ten years ago what it can do today, they'd reintroduce witch-burning".

I once made the mistake of trying to explain the hows and whys of binary to my mother and whilst, from a mathematical perspective, she could understand how to count in binary, she was never ever able to grasp the concept of why it was even remotely useful.
Yannick
I just lol'd at the convo between you and your mom. ;P
voices_in_my_head
I sent a message to my mom telling her what hours I worked today. T9 is apparently beyond her because she responded with "Ok. I lot v"

Which I was eventually able to translate to "Okay. I luv u."

On the downside of parents figuring out technology, my dad found out how to send picture messages with his phone. I've recieved ten in the last hour, most with the caption of "Is this working?"
Daria
Hobbes, I was taught to count in binary on my fingers from a very young age. This created interesting problems at primary school when we were told to hold up fingers for maths answers and I would always hold up a thumb and a forefinger for three.


I'm not a geek. Honest.
Yannick
Mom: *parks car* This is downtown!

That really doesn't sound funny, but it was hilarious. It was kind of like "It is? Really? I had no idea!"
SPEAKERfortheLOST
^ Daria - I know that feeling! Except I went to a Christian elementary school where it would be rather bad for me to answer 4 in binary....

This one is rather generic but actually happened to me the other day. I had just replaced the failed hard drive in a customer's computer and at the mention of replacing his hard drive actually asked me: "So my computer is going to be faster now right?" I had to explain to this rather old gentleman that a hard drive has little if anything to do with the speed of the computer for about an hour... Needless to say my boss wasn't very happy about that.
Daria
QUOTE (SPEAKERfortheLOST @ Oct 4 2009, 03:12 AM) *
^ Daria - I know that feeling! Except I went to a Christian elementary school where it would be rather bad for me to answer 4 in binary....


Also went to a Christian primary- peace sign, man, peace sign biggrin.gif
Usurper MrTeapot
Everything in the house is a doodab or a whatnot. I will occasionally be poked and told to sort out "that bleeding doodab, it's been beeping every ten minutes for the past hour."

It could be the phone, could be a tv remote, could be the smoke/burglar alarm and its up to me to find out. I like to think of it as a game.
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