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Pikasyuu
Disclaimer: Jonman was the original idea for threads like this. I doubt he cares, but I am bored, want people to ask me things, am no longer 15 and slightly less obnoxious, and give credit where credit is due. Also, yes, I remember the relationship advice thread I had that I treated like a neglected plant - watered it a few times and went off to play with kittens. SORRY. This wont be that way. I hope.

So, the general idea is, you ask me things. Then I give you advice. Then you love me and buy me more kittens. Drinks optional. Give me your worst~

;;i adjust my therapy glasses;;
Daria
Dearest Syuu
What can I buy/ make for my dad/ brother/ brother-in-law for Christmas? They're all hard to buy for, and I want to make as many presents this year.
He likes books, making things and computers
He is a chef who loves music (last year I made him a mix cd and a necklace)
He is an illustrator/ musician.

Halp!
Yannick
Dear syuu,

Who do you think should replace Cleveland in Family Guy before Cleveland comes back because his new shows sucks?
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (Daria @ Dec 2 2009, 01:23 PM) *
Dearest Syuu
What can I buy/ make for my dad/ brother/ brother-in-law for Christmas? They're all hard to buy for, and I want to make as many presents this year.
He likes books, making things and computers
He is a chef who loves music (last year I made him a mix cd and a necklace)
He is an illustrator/ musician.

Halp!


write your dad a book that involves talking frogs and a cheerful, but useful message. illustrate it in pencil. you could also consider buying him computer parts so that he could build his own computer, but I can see that getting really expensive. there are also electronic readers where you can buy books and download them straight to it - again, expensive, but it does combine the computers and books aspect.

for the chef who loves music, get him one frozen flounder, one frozen crab, one frozen mermaid, one frozen human, and have him cook them all. inform him that he has just completed the cast of the little mermaid and can hold them up so that they sing and dance accordingly. you can find all of these things in the sea.

the illustrator/musician has me stumped. this is where the 50% less effectiveness comes in. or in this post, 33.3% less.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (Yannick @ Dec 2 2009, 01:28 PM) *
Dear syuu,

Who do you think should replace Cleveland in Family Guy before Cleveland comes back because his new shows sucks?


SPEAKERfortheLOST
Dearest syuu,

My girl and I spend much time apart from each other, at ever increasing lengths, what should I get her for christmas?

Thanks,
SPEAKER
Pikasyuu
Speaker,
A mold of your penis.
Moosh
Syuu,

Why do I havwe no cheesecake? And what's the best way to right this problem?

Moosh
Pikasyuu
Jimbo,
Procure block of cheese. Cut into circle. Slice.
CrazyFooIAintGettinOnNoPlane
O wise Syuu,

Having spent the last 2 days in bed due to (presumably) swine flu, how long should I wait before going to back to work and infecting my coworkers? My fever seems to have dissappeared now, but the family of porcupines who have taken up residence in my throat have not.
Pikasyuu
crazymat,
If you aren't sure whether or not it was h1n1, ask a doctor. The nose swab isn't comfy, but it will save your immediate circle a whole lot of hell. Said doctor could also clear you - but if you're not feeling well, better stay home.
LoLo
Dearest Loveliest Syuu,

Why are chickens so frightening?

-Lo
Yannick
Syuu,

Do you have any methods for getting rid of unanimously unwanted teachers?
CrazyFooIAintGettinOnNoPlane
QUOTE (syuu @ Dec 3 2009, 02:34 PM) *
crazymat,
If you aren't sure whether or not it was h1n1, ask a doctor. The nose swab isn't comfy, but it will save your immediate circle a whole lot of hell. Said doctor could also clear you - but if you're not feeling well, better stay home.

I don't think I'm supposed to go to the doctor unless I'm dying or something. In the UK we have this special pandemic website instead which asks you a few questions and then gives you a code for free drugs.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (LoLo @ Dec 3 2009, 07:46 AM) *
Dearest Loveliest Syuu,

Why are chickens so frightening?

-Lo



Lo,
they aren't. they're cute. duh.

Pikasyuu
QUOTE (Yannick @ Dec 3 2009, 07:53 AM) *
Syuu,

Do you have any methods for getting rid of unanimously unwanted teachers?


Izzers,
depending on whether or not their reason for being unwanted is grounds for termination, written documentation has worked. to my experience, anyway. failing that, try chloroform.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (crazymat @ Dec 3 2009, 09:08 AM) *
QUOTE (syuu @ Dec 3 2009, 02:34 PM) *
crazymat,
If you aren't sure whether or not it was h1n1, ask a doctor. The nose swab isn't comfy, but it will save your immediate circle a whole lot of hell. Said doctor could also clear you - but if you're not feeling well, better stay home.

I don't think I'm supposed to go to the doctor unless I'm dying or something. In the UK we have this special pandemic website instead which asks you a few questions and then gives you a code for free drugs.


wowww-www. here, they have to do a test and such to confirm. well, check the website then, I suppose.
gothictheysay
Crazymat: There are signs here saying DON'T LEAVE YOUR ROOM UNTIL YOUR FEVER HAS BEEN GONE FOR 24 HOURS. I would guess that that would be the best thing to do, and you are probably not contagious after that, although you're still probably miserable.

Dear Syuu,
How do I get rid of that nagging feeling that I'm not doing anything with my life and it's pointless? I already volunteer and such and enjoy it, but I'm kind of bluesy this semester.
LoLo
QUOTE (syuu @ Dec 3 2009, 06:04 PM) *
QUOTE (LoLo @ Dec 3 2009, 07:46 AM) *
Dearest Loveliest Syuu,

Why are chickens so frightening?

-Lo



Lo,
they aren't. they're cute. duh.




You're freakin' me out man! *runs*
LoLo
Dear Syuu,

Do you think folding your eyelids up too much can result in eye bubbles?

-Lo
Pikasyuu
LoLo,
no, but your eyes will fall out.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (gothictheysay @ Dec 3 2009, 07:14 PM) *
Crazymat: There are signs here saying DON'T LEAVE YOUR ROOM UNTIL YOUR FEVER HAS BEEN GONE FOR 24 HOURS. I would guess that that would be the best thing to do, and you are probably not contagious after that, although you're still probably miserable.

Dear Syuu,
How do I get rid of that nagging feeling that I'm not doing anything with my life and it's pointless? I already volunteer and such and enjoy it, but I'm kind of bluesy this semester.


Sarah,
have you resurrected a dinosaur lately?
gothictheysay
...no, that sounds f-ing AWESOME. I'll get to work right away! biggrin.gif
SPEAKERfortheLOST
Dear syuu,

Long time reader, first... well, second, time writing. I have a headache. What could it be?

Thanks,

SPEAKER
Pikasyuu
Speaker,
you could have a spider or cockroach in your ear. do you sleep with your blanket over your head?
SPEAKERfortheLOST
Syuu,
Well I don't normally sleep that way but I did this weekend... though it was a sleeping bag, since I was camping.
vicrawr
Dear syuu,

What's up with the avatar?

Love me.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (SPEAKERfortheLOST @ Dec 6 2009, 03:55 PM) *
Syuu,
Well I don't normally sleep that way but I did this weekend... though it was a sleeping bag, since I was camping.


Speaker,
maybe one got in. yikes. :( see a doctor. barring that, apples and water are a good headache cure. as are the drugs tramadol, ibproufen, and naproxen sodium.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (IrishGuy @ Dec 6 2009, 04:26 PM) *
Dear syuu,

What's up with the avatar?

Love me.


vicar,
it was made by a girl i'd seen in ontd whose lj name is bambinette. she did not give me permission, however, i strongly doubt she will ever stumble across matazone. i wasn't really worried until i noticed that she is lj friends with two people who have a powerful e-hate for me. so, let's just keep hoping.
the icon itself is of lady gaga in the paparazzi video. her purple hair and dark eye makeup remind me of me.
elphaba2
Dear syuu,

What's the best way to have colorful hair on a zero-dollar budget? I've been craving pixie-short neon green cheveux for so long, but just spent my last $20 on kitty litter.

-elph
Pikasyuu
elph -
traditionally, household kool-aid. besides that, the cheapest neon colors are jazz. they suck, though. i recommend waiting until you have ten and getting some MP, leaving it in for two hours, and dancing around.
LoLo
Dear syuu,

I have been invited for dinner and cocktails this weekend. What should I bring with me?

-Lo
Pikasyuu
LoLo,
dinner and cocktails.
and male strippers.
LoLo
Dear Syuu,

Head? Shoulders? Knees? or Toes?

-Lo
Phyllis
Dearest Syuu,

What should I do if I am babysitting and the baby catches fire?

Love,
Candice
SPEAKERfortheLOST
Dear Syuu,

Why do we do it? What is it good for? And for god sakes, why is it green?!?!?

Thank you,
Speaker
Novander
Dear Syuu,

Sometimes hair grows on my face and sometimes I cut it off. How can I stop it growing when I don't want it to, without destroying the possibility of making it grow again at will in the future?

Thanks,
Nov
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (LoLo @ Jan 4 2010, 01:53 PM) *
Dear Syuu,

Head? Shoulders? Knees? or Toes?

-Lo


vagina.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE
Dearest Syuu,

What should I do if I am babysitting and the baby catches fire?

Love,
Candice


I don't know! Stomp on it to stifle the flames?

QUOTE
Dear Syuu,

Why do we do it? What is it good for? And for god sakes, why is it green?!?!?

Thank you,
Speaker


For the good of the people, and stop being racist. It was a wonderful movie and my grandma liked it a lot.

QUOTE
Dear Syuu,

Sometimes hair grows on my face and sometimes I cut it off. How can I stop it growing when I don't want it to, without destroying the possibility of making it grow again at will in the future?

Thanks,
Nov


Have you tried asking it politely?
Eli
Dear Syuu,

Why must I endure my grandmother's tales of when she was a "promiscuous single" ?
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (Eli @ Jan 10 2010, 06:55 AM) *
Dear Syuu,

Why must I endure my grandmother's tales of when she was a "promiscuous single" ?


For the same reason your grandkids will have to hear about how their grandpa got to sit through hearing about what a floozy great great grandma was.
Mata
Dear Syuu,

How much cheaper ae you than Jonman?
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (Mata @ Jan 15 2010, 05:58 AM) *
Dear Syuu,

How much cheaper ae you than Jonman?


two fewer sacrificial chickens are required to summon me. so, basically, if you try to summon him, five chickens in you get me instead of going all seven to get better advice. clever, right?
Mata
Do you get a lot of call outs from people who are in the process of sacrificing seven chickens but not finished yet? And is there an intermediary for six chickens?
Pikasyuu
I offer a chicken layaway program sometimes. But no, not often.
Daria
Dear Syuu
Can you magic cramps away?
Yours in pain,
Daria
vicrawr
Dear syuu,

I had a dream about asking you a question last night, but I don't remember what it was. Do you know what it could've been? The dream before that involved the Vietnam War. That might help.
SPEAKERfortheLOST
Dear Syuu,

I have a question for you. Do you know what it is?
Mata
What song is best to hum when you've got another one stuck in your head?
Tarantio
QUOTE (Mata @ Jan 18 2010, 02:00 PM) *
What song is best to hum when you've got another one stuck in your head?


Personally I use "Magical Trevor", but this thread isn't called "Ask Syuu but get Tara answering instead. Bastage."
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