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PsychWardMike
Dear Jonman,
Why is Nippon Ichi so good? Should I get Makai Kingdom: Chronicles of the Sacred Tome, Rhapsody: A Musical Oddessy, Disgaea: Hour of Darkness, and LaPucelle: Tactics?
Jonman
QUOTE (PsychWardMike @ Dec 27 2005, 11:24 PM)
Dear Jonman,
  Why is Nippon Ichi so good?  Should I get Makai Kingdom: Chronicles of the Sacred Tome, Rhapsody: A Musical Oddessy, Disgaea: Hour of Darkness, and LaPucelle: Tactics?
*


Why are they so good? Because there's no-one else making games quite like them. They're happy to ignore the current rulebook of videogame design good practice. Shiny hi-res graphics? Bah.

Of the ones you list, I've only played Disgaea, which had me hooked for over 100 hours. I'd heartily recomend that, although be warned - it's a Marmite game - you either love it or hate it. I can perfectly understand someone hating it - it requires a certain level of obsessiveness to fully immerse yourself in the sheer depth of stat fiddling and levelling up required.

That said, from what I know you you, Mike, you should go out and purchase this game before your next meal. I reckon you'll adore it.

As for the other ones, I can only assume that they're in a similar vein, although Disgaea is pretty much recognised by the geek-game-press as the crowning achievement. I've also been playing Phantom Brave on and off for the last year (just clocked up the 100th hour on that over Chrimble), and that's thoroughly enjoyable, although not quite as sweet as Disgaea.
LoLo
Dear Jonman,

Is there anyway I can get the over analyzy part of my brain removed? I hung out with a male friend of mine and have spent the last few days dissecting the whole meeting, and everything that was said afterward, and am annoying myself with it.

-LoLo
Jonman
QUOTE (LoLo @ Jan 1 2006, 06:58 AM)
Dear Jonman,

Is there anyway I can get the over analyzy part of my brain removed?  I hung out with a male friend of mine and have spent the last few days dissecting the whole meeting, and everything that was said afterward, and am annoying myself with it.

-LoLo
*


Yeah, have a sex change. *ducks*

The whole over-analysing thing does seem to be a particularly female problem. I therefore suggest trying to behave in a more masculine fashion. You know, scratch your bits in public, blatently stare at women's wobbly bits, claim that beer is good for you, that kind of thing. Hopefully, by aping the male of the species, your throught patterns will fall into a more masculine shape.
PsychWardMike
I picked up LaPucelle Tactics and am currently hunting for the Disgaea and the rest. I figure I'll finish Phantom Brave before starting... looks like I have my gaming cut out for me! I'm twenty hours in and barely a level 18 summoner. I'm looking forward to having something to distract me from fresh air, necessary school work, friends, and family again! Thank you, Jonman!
Mutilation
Dearest Jonman,

What happened to the picture of you with a J on the back of your head? That was a classic. I also can't seem to see your new avatar. Is this something on my side or does everyone have problems seeing it?
PsychWardMike
Dear Jonman,
Are you having a happy birthday? Hope so.
Jonman
QUOTE (Mutilation @ Jan 5 2006, 02:48 PM)
Dearest Jonman,

What happened to the picture of you with a J on the back of your head? That was a classic. I also can't seem to see your new avatar. Is this something on my side or does everyone have problems seeing it?
*


I think I probably accidentally deleted it from the site. And I've been too lazy to put one back up. So the good news is that it's not anything on your side.

I might get around to getting a new av sorted at some point....
Jonman
QUOTE (PsychWardMike @ Jan 5 2006, 07:41 PM)
Dear Jonman,
  Are you having a happy birthday?  Hope so.
*


Not especially so, but thanks for asking. Not for any bad reason, but it's just a regular Thursday. I went to work, got pretty bored, had a really enjoyable game of squash after work, and Mrs. Jonman cooked me a delicious (and suitably enormous) bowl of yummy pasta.

I've got a bit of a Scrooge complex going on with birthdays anyway. I've long ago had all the exciting ones. Plus we're trying to be super super thrifty, to save money for our possible move back to Seattle later this year.
Fluffy
Dear Jonman,

I've noticed that pretty much every bit of modern measurement of time is based off of 12 or one of its multiples. However, the number of days in a week and the number of days/weeks in a month ignore this rule. The number of days in a week stay loyal to the number 7, and the number of days/weeks in a month just sort of hop all over the place. That being the case, if one had a pet dog and a pet rabbit. One would probably name the dog "Week" and the rabbit "Month," right? Well, the problem is that "Week" and "Weak" are homonyms, and it wouldn't be good to hurt the dogs feelings by naming it "Weak." So, one runs into a problem here. What would you do, O Jonman?
Jonman
QUOTE (Fluffy @ Jan 8 2006, 11:43 AM)
Dear Jonman,

I've noticed that pretty much every bit of modern measurement of time is based off of 12 or one of its multiples.  However, the number of days in a week and the number of days/weeks in a month ignore this rule.  The number of days in a week stay loyal to the number 7, and the number of days/weeks in a month just sort of hop all over the place. 
*


I'm going to take issue with this first of all. You rightly point out the days in a week is nothing to do with 12. And that days in a month is nothing to do with 12. Likewise, days in a year is nothing to do with 12 (approx 365.25). At the other end of the scale, down in the tiny wee bits of time, once we get under a second, whaddya know, we all of a sudden go metric. Milli, micro, nano, pico, femto, atto, zepto and yoctoseconds all have nowt to do with 12, and everything to do with 1000. So, really, the only bits of time that are based around 12 is seconds in a minute, minutes in an hour, and hours in a day.

Which isn't that suprising when you look at the way other 'old' systems of measurement work - the imperial system is an utter mess, there is no 'common factor' (what in the metric system would be 10). 16 ounces in a pound, 14 pounds in a stone. 2240 pounds in a hundredweight (not divisible by 12, you'll note).

12 inches in a foot, to be sure, but 3 feet in a yard, and 1760 yards in a mile (not divisible by 12 either).

So the upshot of what I'm saying is that I think you're picking a few 12's out of the mass of bonkers numbers that used to be used for measurement. Most of them are no longer used since the metric system was invented (and no matter how much you hate the French, is unavoidably a much more sensible system).

QUOTE (Fluffy @ Jan 8 2006, 11:43 AM)
That being the case, if one had a pet dog and a pet rabbit.  One would probably name the dog "Week" and the rabbit "Month," right?  Well, the problem is that "Week" and "Weak" are homonyms, and it wouldn't be good to hurt the dogs feelings by naming it "Weak."  So, one runs into a problem here.  What would you do, O Jonman?
*


It's all a matter of pronunciation. If you prounouce 'Week' as Wee-eek, then that ought to make the difference. Or Wee-ee-kay. I quite like that one.
Fluffy
Dear Jonman,

Thank you for your previous answer. Anyway, now that you mention metric, I realized something. Now, I always hear SI measurement referred to as a sort of improved metric system. Maybe this would be clear to me if I saw metric in everyday life (i.e. outside of a science class once in a while, then again, that uses SI, right?), but I don't get it. What's the difference between SI and metric measurement? I understand them (I love such simple measurements of ten, a welcome relief from the feet that I don't know how many of there are in a mile). I just can't see it? Did the scientists just slap a fancy name on the metric system so that they could be all spiffy and such?
Jonman
QUOTE (Fluffy @ Jan 8 2006, 12:10 PM)
Dear Jonman,

Thank you for your previous answer.  Anyway, now that you mention metric, I realized something.  Now, I always hear SI measurement referred to as a sort of improved metric system.  Maybe this would be clear to me if I saw metric in everyday life (i.e. outside of a science class once in a while, then again, that uses SI, right?), but I don't get it.  What's the difference between SI and metric measurement?  I understand them (I love such simple measurements of ten, a welcome relief from the feet that I don't know how many of there are in a mile).  I just can't see it?  Did the scientists just slap a fancy name on the metric system so that they could be all spiffy and such?
*


Well, I didn't actually know the difference meself, but 5 mintues with our friend the internet has edumacated me.

The metric system was the original base-10 system of measurement, invented by the French, and used by the French since the French Revolution (i.e. 1800 onwards). By the middle of the 1900s, various countries around the world were using variations of the metric system (and some not using it at all, like us over here in the UK, and those American lot over the pond). It was realised that a common system would be really useful, especially in light of the amount of scientific and industrial international co-operation going on.

Therefore , a bunch of dome-headed clever people put their pointy heads together after the second world war, and came up with a defninitive version of the metric system, based on a small number of base units, which all other secondary units can be derived from. The base units they chose were the metre, kilogram and second, ampere (electric current), Kelvin (temperature) and candela (luminosity).

The name comes from the French, something like (excuse my French, it's rubbish) Systeme International blahblahblah, hence SI.

P.S. Just found out there's a seventh base unit, the mole (amount of a substance in terms of number of particles). It was added at a later date in the '70s.
elphaba2
QUOTE (Jonman @ Jan 8 2006, 11:34 AM)
...a bunch of dome-headed clever people put their pointy heads together...
*


dome head

pointy head

I fail to see the similarities. Could you discuss, please, Jonman?
Jonman
QUOTE (elphaba2 @ Jan 8 2006, 06:36 PM)
QUOTE (Jonman @ Jan 8 2006, 11:34 AM)
...a bunch of dome-headed clever people put their pointy heads together...
*


I fail to see the similarities. Could you discuss, please, Jonman?
*



You fail to see the similarity between a building and a man with the nosecone from a propellor on his head? I'm not suprised - I'm having similar difficulties.
Astarael
Dear Jonman,
Is it just me or does the first picture resemble the head of a giant and ghetto Darth Vader?
Jonman
QUOTE (Astarael @ Jan 8 2006, 09:07 PM)
Dear Jonman,
Is it just me or does the first picture resemble the head of a giant and ghetto Darth Vader?
*


True. It'd be pretty freakin' bling to live in a giant Vader helmet.
Sir Psycho Sexy
Dear Jonman,

Is the innuendo in this ad as entertaining to you as it is to me?

cheers,
p@
Jonman
QUOTE (Sir_Psycho_Sexy @ Jan 10 2006, 03:58 AM)
Dear Jonman,

Is the innuendo in this ad as entertaining to you as it is to me?

cheers,
p@
*


Are you sure you posted the right link? I'm failing to see any innuendo.
Astarael
If it has the word "endowment" in it, then I suppose so. It's pretty funny, but I've seen worse. And the fact that it's "endowmentuk" just makes it funnier. Thanks for sharing!
voices_in_my_head
Jonman,

Why are kids still competitive when they're in PE? Don't people sign up for PE so that they didn't have to compete?
Sir Psycho Sexy
QUOTE (Astarael @ Jan 10 2006, 10:47 PM)
If it has the word "endowment" in it, then I suppose so. It's pretty funny, but I've seen worse. And the fact that it's "endowmentuk" just makes it funnier. Thanks for sharing!
*


You're right, but endowment short fall in my head turned into small penis or erectile dysfunction, then the thing that looks like the petrol gauge going from full to empty just seems funny, the idea of someone sueing for not being able to get it up or having a small willy just made me giggle and the 60 second test involved....well provocative pictures or a ruler. That I have to explain all this is quite disheartening, do I look for innuendos everywhere or do I just see the funny side of everything?
oxym0ronical
Dearest Jonman,

Help! My sister lived with me for nearly 4 years previously. We lived and worked together when we were both single (and fought constantly with each other as siblings often do when they spend 99% of their time together) and then she started dating and eventually moved her boyfriend in. I moved out due to her horrid boyfriend. Said horrid boyfriend is now her horrid husband. They have a 9 month old daughter. I am now married as well, and have been very happy to have a peaceful and quiet home.

Fast-forward to now. They've fallen on very hard times and, since they both work here rather than the town they're living in, they've decided to move in with me temporarily. How do I go about living peacefully and not killing someone while they're staying here?! How do I get used to not having privacy and time away from people? Or, failing all else, where's a good place to hide the bodies? wink.gif

Thanks,
A frustrated sibling
Jonman
QUOTE (voices_in_my_head @ Jan 11 2006, 12:24 AM)
Jonman,

Why are kids still competitive when they're in PE? Don't people sign up for PE so that they didn't have to compete?
*


More to the point, why would you ever think that all kids wouldn't be competetive. Kids are competetive. Adults are competetive. It's satisfying to be the best at something, no two ways about it. Probably a bloody good job that that drive is fixed into us, or we'd still be sitting in trees eating bananas.

Maybe this is a new-fangled thing that my aging brain can't fathom - the whole non-competetiveness issue, so that the fat, slow, or badly co-ordinated kids don't feel left out. I put non-competetive sports in the same category that I put alcohol-free beer. Pretty gosh-darned pointless. The entire point of sports is to compete, to prove that you're better, faster, stronger, smarter or richer (in the case of expensive sports) than your competitors. Wouldn't be suprised if it's not wired into the same part of our reptilian limbic brain that deals with courtship and impressing a mate.

Face it girls, there's nowt you like more than a sweaty man in lycra.
Jonman
QUOTE (oxym0ronical @ Jan 15 2006, 08:05 AM)
Dearest Jonman,

Help! My sister lived with me for nearly 4 years previously. We lived and worked together when we were both single (and fought constantly with each other as siblings often do when they spend 99% of their time together) and then she started dating and eventually moved her boyfriend in. I moved out due to her horrid boyfriend. Said horrid boyfriend is now her horrid husband. They have a 9 month old daughter. I am now married as well, and have been very happy to have a peaceful and quiet home.

Fast-forward to now. They've fallen on very hard times and, since they both work here rather than the town they're living in, they've decided to move in with me temporarily. How do I go about living peacefully and not killing someone while they're staying here?! How do I get used to not having privacy and time away from people? Or, failing all else, where's a good place to hide the bodies? wink.gif

Thanks,
A frustrated sibling
*


Argh! I feel your pain. I had my mum stay with me for 4 days over Christmas, and it drove me up the wall. The thought of any family staying with for any longer chills me to the bone.

Anyway, this is about your problems, not mine. I'm going to ask a few questions....
(1) Did they ask you whether they could move in, or just decide that they would? If it's the former, you'd be quite within your rights to tell them to **** off. If it's a latter, and you've agreed that they can move in, then you've kind of shot yourself in the foot, and don't really have anyone to blame but yourself.

(2) Define temporary. If you mean that they're going to stay with you for 2 weeks while they find their own place, I feel that you may just have to suck it up and deal for the sake of family harmony. If temporary means forever and a day, then once again, I think that you'd be within your rights to renegotiate.

(3) I'm assuming that you're quite recently married too then? That could work as leverage in your favour. Nothing spoils a newlywed lovebubble like the inlaws shagging in the next room. You could (quite rightly, and without deceit) claim that you don't feel it's a good idea as you're still adjusting to your new marital status yourself.

Some other things to consider.....

As with all relationshippy type questions, I return to my favourite topic - communication. Have you and your sister been straight with each other about her moving in? Has she been straight with you about the timescales involved, and whether she has other options? Have you been straight with her about your feelings of dread about cohabiting again? Have either of you discussed how much you used to fight when you lived together before? Because, if not, chances are that the same issues will cause the same tensions, and bingo - you're back right where you were.

If nothing else, the 4 of you ought to sit down and have a serious, frank discussion about it. If it ends in a screaming argument with pets being thrown, then that might be some food for thought that perhaps it's not the best idea, and everyone ought to work towards a better solution. If not, then it should at least make them aware of your concerns, and (assuming they're not nutjobs), they might be a little more careful of your feelings, and maybe even show a little gratitude.

As to privacy, there's always workarounds. Me and the missus have found it quite nice to nip out for a half-hour stroll around the neighbourhood when we get home from work - away from the distractions of home (intertron and TV and kitchen), we can have a proper chat while we get some gentle exercise. If memory serves, you live in some part of Canada where the outside temperature is low enough to kill a monkey within minutes, so that might not be such a good idea in the winter months, eh?

At the end of the day, it's your house, and it's your final say as to whether they stay or not. I understand the conflict of interest between your family duty and your personal desire not to have to do unpleasant things. But if your sister (and more importantly, her husband) are loons, tell them to bugger off, or to only stay for a few weeks while they get sorted somewhere else.
voices_in_my_head
QUOTE (Jonman @ Jan 16 2006, 01:04 PM)
QUOTE (voices_in_my_head @ Jan 11 2006, 12:24 AM)
Jonman,

Why are kids still competitive when they're in PE? Don't people sign up for PE so that they didn't have to compete?
*

Maybe this is a new-fangled thing that my aging brain can't fathom - the whole non-competetiveness issue, so that the fat, slow, or badly co-ordinated kids don't feel left out. I put non-competetive sports in the same category that I put alcohol-free beer. Pretty gosh-darned pointless. The entire point of sports is to compete, to prove that you're better, faster, stronger, smarter or richer (in the case of expensive sports) than your competitors. Wouldn't be suprised if it's not wired into the same part of our reptilian limbic brain that deals with courtship and impressing a mate.
*



But we're forced to take some sort of sport no matter what amount of excersice you do at home. They said it in the little class discription: Pe is the only non-competitive sport and it's there for kids who aren't competitive.

Really, Is "Best at dodgeball" something to be proud of?
Astarael
"Best at dodgeball," in my experience, means that you're the best at throwing the ball really hard at someone's head when the teacher isn't looking to make the target cry. I have this unfortunate tendency to be the target, even when playing basketball or soccer, hence my dislike for all physical competitive sports. Now, if actually playing the competitive sports in PE was optional (running in circles around the field or track or whatever being the other choice,) I wouldn't mind half so much because I could opt out. I take great delight in knowing that no-one can ever force me to play dodgeball again. smile.gif
But on to my question...
If my friend is writing sort of horrid Star Wars fanfiction about these two girls of the race that General Grevious was before he turned into an icky robot, what on earth should I say? It's very generic writing, but she thinks it's original. Thus far I've been trying to point out the good stuff, like her dialogue, but she's handing me one chapter a week to critique and I'm running out of things to say. She takes criticism very badly and sees it as a reflection on her. She's a good friend, but she just can't handle hearing that her stories aren't that good.
~Thanks, Ast
Jonman
QUOTE (voices_in_my_head @ Jan 16 2006, 07:20 PM)
Really, Is "Best at dodgeball" something to be proud of?
*


Why not? It's a televised sport. More so than chess, and loads of people would be dead proud to be the Best at Chess.
Jonman
QUOTE (Astarael @ Jan 16 2006, 07:40 PM)
But on to my question...
If my friend is writing sort of horrid Star Wars fanfiction about these two girls of the race that General Grevious was before he turned into an icky robot, what on earth should I say? It's very generic writing, but she thinks it's original. Thus far I've been trying to point out the good stuff, like her dialogue, but she's handing me one chapter a week to critique and I'm running out of things to say. She takes criticism very badly and sees it as a reflection on her. She's a good friend, but she just can't handle hearing that her stories aren't that good.
~Thanks, Ast
*


Perhaps it would be better coming from a friend? Now I think about that, perhaps not. Anyway, if her writing is rubbish, it's only a matter of time before someone's honest with her. I daresay that you might be better at putting it tactfully than some person.

Either that, or start suggesting some improvements. Like making the girls turn into robots. Lesbian robots. With lasers. In their boobs. Their shiny robot laser boobs.

Thats more like how fanfiction should be.
Mata
Which reminds me of some truly bizarre Harry Potter slash fiction I once read by a fan of this site...

Anyway, I thought I'd pop by to say congrats, because this thread is rapidly approaching having been viewed 60,000 times! Nice one Jon.
Jonman
QUOTE (Mata @ Jan 17 2006, 03:11 AM)
Which reminds me of some truly bizarre Harry Potter slash fiction I once read by a fan of this site...

Anyway, I thought I'd pop by to say congrats, because this thread is rapidly approaching having been viewed 60,000 times! Nice one Jon.
*


*does victory laps in his pants*

Actually, you have to bear in mind that several thousand of those are going to be me. Which doesn't really count.

[EDIT - just noticed how well I mangled my tenses there. Go me.]
Phyllis
Dearest Jonman,

Why do people insist on spelling my name "Candace" when the correct spelling is right there in front of them? I always use the name "candice" on discussion boards. Do they think I can't spell my own name? Is it all some secret plot against the letter i?

Yours,
Candice
Astarael
Dear Jonman,
Thanks for the advice about the fanfiction. I may need it, as my little sister has just started writing original prose. When asked what was wrong with it, I tried to tell her politely that having three people speak on one line of text with no commas or periods in between was difficult to read, but that the story itself looked good. She started getting angry and saying that it didn't matter and Mom immediately defended her, so it looks like honest critique (the story is roughly half angst) is out. Any advice on how to grit my teeth while every relative we know is spouting off about how she's going to be our writer emeritus?
~Ast
The Travis
Dear Jonman-

I don't know how I missed this thread before. I apologise for stealing your thread idea, though it was an accident. My questions- Are we cool man? Can we still be friends?

Sir Travis J. Farnsworth of Mars
LoLo
Dear Jonman,

I'm leaving L.A. today and all I got were 4 lousey bags and a lousey mug. Any ideas on how I could get a lousey shirt before I go, without having to pay for it or steal it?

- L.A. Lo
Mutilation
Dear Jonman,

How am I meant to know if a certain girl fancies me or is just really overly nice and obnoxious O_o?
Jonman
QUOTE (candice @ Jan 18 2006, 07:15 PM)
Dearest Jonman,

Why do people insist on spelling my name "Candace" when the correct spelling is right there in front of them?  I always use the name "candice" on discussion boards.  Do they think I can't spell my own name?  Is it all some secret plot against the letter i?

Yours,
Candice
*


Dear Cand (problem solved right there, you see - no flies on me),

Perhaps the problem is that here in the UK, 'Candace' is the accepted spelling of the name. Or one of the accepted spellings anyway - the only Candace I've ever known here spelt it that way. Either that, or yes, there is a secret propoganda plot to mislead the public about the spelling of your name. Which is obviously working.

Anyway, count your blessings, I regularly get both my names (first and last) misspelt at the same time. I'm constantly amazed at how many people spell my name with a double 'p' at the end instead of a single one. I mean, how many words end in double P?
Jonman
QUOTE (Astarael @ Jan 18 2006, 11:03 PM)
Dear Jonman,
Thanks for the advice about the fanfiction. I may need it, as my little sister has just started writing original prose. When asked what was wrong with it, I tried to tell her politely that having three people speak on one line of text with no commas or periods in between was difficult to read, but that the story itself looked good. She started getting angry and saying that it didn't matter and Mom immediately defended her, so it looks like honest critique (the story is roughly half angst) is out. Any advice on how to grit my teeth while every relative we know is spouting off about how she's going to be our writer emeritus?
~Ast
*


I refer you to my previous point. Write some fanfic of your own. Make sure to include the lesbian robot hookers from the future (with laser boobs). Try and fit in a fight scene on a giant trampoline. During an earthquake.

Trust me. When in doubt, satirise.
Jonman
QUOTE (The Travis @ Jan 20 2006, 05:47 PM)
Dear Jonman-

I don't know how I missed this thread before. I apologise for stealing your thread idea, though it was an accident. My questions- Are we cool man? Can we still be friends?

Sir Travis J. Farnsworth of Mars
*


Apology accepted.

Dunno whether you're cool, but I'm cooler than a breakdancing dolphin. If you can deal with my superhuman levels of coolnicity, then sure, we can be friends.
Jonman
QUOTE (LoLo @ Jan 22 2006, 04:28 PM)
Dear Jonman,

I'm leaving L.A. today and all I got were 4 lousey bags and a lousey mug.  Any ideas on how I could get a lousey shirt before I go, without having to pay for it or steal it?

- L.A. Lo
*


It was good enough for Medieval peasants, so it should be good enough for you. Yes! Of course I'm talking about the barter system!

Swap one of your really crappy shirts for a lousey LA one. Not sure what the exchange rate is - you may need to bulk up your offer by including the lint from one or more of your pockets.
elphaba2
Dear Jonman,

I have newly short hair and have no idea what to do with it. It's around an inch and a half, and its primary pastime is sitting there on the top of my head. How can I make it more interesting?

Also, how does one appropriately mourn dreadlocks?
Jonman
QUOTE (elphaba2 @ Jan 24 2006, 10:28 PM)
Dear Jonman,

I have newly short hair and have no idea what to do with it. It's around an inch and a half, and its primary pastime is sitting there on the top of my head. How can I make it more interesting?


Handstands are the answer. When in the handstand position, not only do to you gain kudos for being gynastically amazing, but your hair takes on a whole new persona, that of upside-down hair. Upside-down hair is like normal hair, only upside-down . There's very little in the world that can't be made interesting by turning it upside down. Watch - I shall demonstrate....

Mice, see? Not very interesting. Upside-down mice on the other hand: quite amusing.

Accountants. Not very interesting...buuuuut....Upside-down accountants, with their ker-azy upside-down calculators - hmmm.

Atonal melodies - not very interesting, but turn them upside-down , and bloody hell! They're bonkers interesting!

I have a similar theory about adding beaks to things to make them more amusing. Mice with beaks? Accountants with beaks? Atonal melodies....with beaks? Genius.

So, in summary, put a beak on your head.



QUOTE (elphaba2 @ Jan 24 2006, 10:28 PM)
Also, how does one appropriately mourn dreadlocks?
*


The same way we mourn anything worth a good mourning. A Viking funeral boat! Yes, load your dreads onto any water-going vessel, launch it into the evening sunset with a fire it it's belly, and watch the soul of your dreads ascend to Valhalla to adorn the head of a mythical warrior and be regaled with tales of Xena: Warrior Princess ™.

You can't go wrong with a bit of Norse in my book.
Usurper MrTeapot
Beer! Metal! Odin!

I guess I must follow up with a question now.

Dear ManJon

What do you want done with your body after you die? Would you have a Viking funeral boat?

Yours Tman.
lemme
johnman, i am cursed with a very healthy set of lungs and am unable to find anything to restrain them properly any suggestions? And as i work outside in the heat all day a leather corset is not the answer smile.gif


two oranges on a toothpick
Jonman
QUOTE (MrTeapot @ Jan 27 2006, 02:20 AM)
Beer! Metal! Odin!

I guess I must follow up with a question now.

Dear ManJon

What do you want done with your body after you die? Would you have a Viking funeral boat?

Yours Tman.
*


Well, firstly, I'm not going to die. I'm going to sublime into a pure energy form. And then spend my afterlife sneaking into strip clubs without paying.

However, if I was going to die, here's my preferred methods of body-disposal (in order of preference).

1: Shoot me into space in a space-casket. With any luck, I'll land on a planet with amazing regenerative powers, and come back to life. Worked for Nimoy, it could work for me.

2: Viking funeral trolley. Stick me in a supermarket trolley, set me on fire, then push me out into the freezer aisle.

3: Crustmation. It's a cross between crustacean and cremation.
Jonman
QUOTE (lemme @ Jan 31 2006, 05:32 AM)
johnman,  i am cursed with a very healthy set of lungs and am unable to find anything to restrain them properly any suggestions?  And as i work outside in the heat all day a leather corset is not the answer  smile.gif


two oranges on a toothpick
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As my name suggests, I am in fact a man, and thus my experiences of boobs are limited to jiggling, toying with and staring at them. Being a personal shopper in the lingerie department is not something I've done. Although now that I think about it....


Anyway, from reading the papers and wotnot, it seems that an awful lot of women are wearing the wrong size of bra. I suggest that you perhaps pop into your local mall, go to the Victoria's Secret shop (or whatever bra-outlet they have there), and have one of the lovely lady assistants measure your chaps up properly. It may well be the case that you're simply not wearing the correct size, and thus aren't getting the support you need.

Additionally (and I'm clutching at straws here), you could try a sports bra - that's certainly designed to keep those bad boys under firm control.

And failing all that, if by "healthy" you mean "big enough to have a gravity well" there's always the option of having something custom made. I used to date a girl with spectacularly massive bozonkers, and she had bras and swimwear custom made to fit her. Wasn't cheap, but she said it was the only way she could get anything that was really comfortable.
Jonman
QUOTE (Mutilation @ Jan 22 2006, 09:52 PM)
Dear Jonman,

How am I meant to know if a certain girl fancies me or is just really overly nice and obnoxious O_o?
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Sorry - bit of a delay on the line here.

Call me stupid, but you could always ask her. What's the worst that could happen.
Mata
QUOTE (Jonman @ Feb 1 2006, 11:06 PM)
And failing all that, if by "healthy" you mean "big enough to have a gravity well" there's always the option of having something custom made.
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Or, in a more radical procedure, having the breasts customised instead. It might be cheaper in the long run and avoids back pain in later life!
Jonman
QUOTE (Mata @ Feb 2 2006, 12:40 AM)
QUOTE (Jonman @ Feb 1 2006, 11:06 PM)
And failing all that, if by "healthy" you mean "big enough to have a gravity well" there's always the option of having something custom made.
*

Or, in a more radical procedure, having the breasts customised instead. It might be cheaper in the long run and avoids back pain in later life!
*



Yeah, have beaks stuck on them. That's my kind of customisation.
voices_in_my_head
Jonman-

I have a bad toothache, and my first dentist appointment isn't until sometime around Friday. Would you happen to know of any ways to help the pain until then?
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