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MistressAlti
Look, I've hit the epitome of forum burnout and annoyance. I'm so f**king sick of coming on here and sorting through your spam to find the few valuable posts of a couple of members. I'm tired of running a fansite for a group of people when no one seems to know it even exists. It kills me inside to stay here and keep propping this place up when the very people I used to come here for keep disappearing. And, most importantly, I can't stand the anger that boils up inside for a few particulars who have made this place virtually unbearable for me.

I can't even come on here and have a semi-intelligent discussion anymore. If it's not the rampant idiocy of the posts that kills it, then it's my inability to contain my ever-growing frustration with those that are known for such posts. I know that underlying sarcastic growl behind everything I type is raging... I don't know why I even bother with the subtlety anymore. I'm pissed off. Do you hear it clearly now? Do you?

And this is why I've decided to leave.

My friendships around here feel severed anyway, to be honest. Maybe Lo's right, that the cliques have happened and it's destroyed the community we ought to be. I don't know. I don't have the answers. All I know is, I can't hardly find it in me to keep ignoring that this is NOT the forum I joined and loved so much. I practically lived here for a few months; now I force myself to get online and wade through the sh!t. I could spend a very long time explaining why I believe this happened, but to be honest, I don't care anymore. It just did.

My absence will be indefinite. Maybe I'll regret this in a month. Maybe I'll miss it. I doubt it, though. I just can't stay someplace where I no longer feel necessary, welcome, valued, or at peace.

Have a nice life.
craziness
missy, please dont leave!!!!! i am getting a bit fed up with it as well, but im not leaving! im just hoping everything will clear up, and im going to camp soon anyways! please dont go!!!!!!!!!! i love you! you are one of the sanest people here! we need you!
Debaser
cya missy...i'll miss you around...

/me sighs...it's sad to see someone who's been around for so long up and leave...
CrissiLove
wow.... *scared at what I may have come back to* I'm really sorry that things have been so bad around here for you Mistress.... I have really missed you and I hope that you take care *Hugs*
LoLo
I understand Missy. Have a nice time in the real world.
cheese is funny
i feel responsible for this... me being a spam whore and spamming quite often....

im sorry you feel this way missy.... i dont even know waht to say...

i will miss you being here missy... i never really talked to you much... but you were and still are a part of these forums.. and i have to say im sorry... i spammed too much... and i think i made noobs feel taht i was ok to spam like me... i feel like crap... i feel so responsible...
Tarantio
well all i can say is ill miss ya missy. be assured there are those who appreciate your work, and there are those who share your views on spam. but its a fact of things. rest assured, those who dont take this seriously will be gone eventually. we who do (and we are legion) will be here waiting for your return. godspeed girl!
reaper
What is going on here. I have only been here for a short amount of time but already I feel like i belong but I definatly would not feel that way if it were not for people like you missy. You and so many others have been so nice to me and for you to leave because of spam would be just wrong. I know if we all work together we could maybe cut down on the spam. This is a place where we are supposed to be able to speak our mind right? and if one of us has a problem we should all help to make it better. We are all friends and I am willing to help reduce the amount of spam if everyone else is. Please do not leave Missy, this place would not be the same without you
TigerLily013
Why are people here dropping like flies?

I feel a little bad myself, being one of the not-as-old-as-you kinda people. I will miss you Missy, It just wont be the same....

It's sad to see people go like this.
elf
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ Jun 15 2003, 05:20 PM)
i feel responsible for this... me being a spam whore and spamming quite often....

im sorry you feel this way missy.... i dont even know waht to say...

i will miss you being here missy... i never really talked to you much... but you were and still are a part of these forums.. and i have to say im sorry... i spammed too much... and i think i made noobs feel taht i was ok to spam like me... i feel like crap... i feel so responsible...

I'm sorry if I caused anything... I usually don't spam in the relevant threads... However we're all gonna miss ya... ;.;...
gerbilfromhell
dammit, i knew this's what'd happen to the forum...................
well, cya missy, jus try and remember how the forum USED to be with only like 150-ish members in it sad.gif
Phyllis
i'm sorry you feel that way =/

i always liked reading your posts because you always seemed to have something interesting to say.

i know i'm pretty new around here..and heh i'm sorry if i happened to be one of the people who caused you to get burnt out on this forum--never meant to. and if i'm not, well then i'm sure those who did never meant to either. they were just trying to have fun, i suppose.

anyway, take care, and i hope sometime in the future you decide to return.
TigerLily013
Please......In your wisdom of being here for so long, let not the past spam kill off your matazone spirit. If we all work together, we can get rid of unneeded spam and we all will be happy again.

Don't let things fall apart.
gerbilfromhell
missy, don't take away the fansite. plz it's too great and you worked too hard for it to just dissapear like that
(last post, btw)
ravein
sad.gif just simply sad.gif
Pikasyuu
This is where I would make a long post about why you shouldn't leave.

But I have no right to say it, I know. Missy, I just started actually talking to you, and it really fecking blows that now you're ditching this excuse for what used to be. Because, you're a great person. You're loads of fun to talk to, funny, entertaining, and really sweet when it comes down to it. You have every reason to be upset about what's going on. Every single reason. And really, I don't want you to go. I would grab your ankles and cry and make a hissy fit if I could. But I have no damn right, and it sucks.

I'd imagine after your departure a bunch of others will leave. And the forum itself will collapse into an abyss of spam and others feeling the burnout, and pretty soon, just a couple people will be posting. Then I think it'll start again, and those few newbies will become the old folks like you are to me. Kind of sad, and really depressing.. but it's only a semi-decent prediction. I love these forums. I love the people I've met on the forums. You, Fuzzy, InKy, LoLo, Debbie, Cheez, Leo, Jaq you guys mean so much to me, you don't even know. Someone out there's reading this and thinking, " On a forum? Hah. " Well good for you. But people don't have a handle on what they feel, and I'm no exception.

I'm probably going to burnout after you all leave too. I'm going to sulk a few days in IRC, make one or two posts a day, and eventually not come around so much. Then maybe not at all. But for the love of God, somebody here has to stay. In the people listed above, somebody fecking stay. That's the only thing that's keeping this thing even on a damn thread. No pun intended. That's all.
Industrial Kybosh
Well, we've already talked this through in IRC. I hear and understand your reasons, and as such I respect them.

Take a break, if that's what you need - hey, it works for me! But, if and when you feel ready, know that you'll be welcomed back with open arms by many people who've missed you.

Just don't disappear altogether, OK? I do't think I could deal with that...
poppa.moo
I'm so sorry to hear that missy. You have always been one of the big time postersto me. I remember when i first joined, i didn't know the attitude of the forum, and saw you as one of the 'bigger' people, who knew a lot, and would help anyone out. I had, and still have great respect for you, and will miss you loads. Here's hoping things get sorted and you can come back soon. xxx
sad.gif sad.gif sad.gif
leopold
*sigh*

This is exactly the sort of thing I've been narked about for a while... This is also why I've been a bit heavy on the anti-spam front recently too... I'm gettin tired of people leavin this place, especially those who made it the great place to be that it was, an not the spam-infested nonsense it is becomin.

The time has come to effect a change round here! I know that some of ya will go "Yeah, easy fer you to say, Mr Mod!", but I reckon those of us who really care about this place won't let it descend any further. We can all make an effort here - it doesn't need me to send PMs to people askin them to stop spam. It takes nothin to PM someone if you're cross wi them, rather than havin it out in open forum. And remember the golden rule, if ya have nothin to say, then say nothin... "It's better to be silent and thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt".

Missy has been a major player here, an seein her go like this is not good! Let's put the brakes on this now!

Missy, it's really sad to see ya go, honey. A lot of us really appreciate yer efforts, an we do like havin ya around. I can understand yer reasons for goin (although I don't have the full SP on that) but I think you'd be instrumental in helpin change things here. I hope ya come back soon, we're all gonna miss ya...
nordelen
i would like to say this simple message to MistressAlti: im sorry. i know that i am one of the irrelivent posters. i will try to clean up my act. (i'm not being sarcastic by the way).
reaper
Well I am one person who wants to help stop spam in any way I can. I mean something has to be done here. We dont want this place to fall apart and we are starting to lose people over it,thats not right. We should all be working towards ridding this place of so much useless spam and only post relivent things. I am almost tempted to PM Mata and ask for his advice in this because I do not wish to see anyone leave here especailly not Missy or Katii. Not like this......not like this....... sad.gif
spuglet
i never have realised what the fuss is in taking this so seriousley, i am anti spam but its never bothered me that much.
i hope recent changes in the forums will help persuade you to stay though missy, just stay in the discussion forums or something, because you really will be missed and i dont want you to go
Mata
I'd be very sad to see you go. I hope you come back and give it another go with the changes I've put in place!
MistressAlti
Well, I'll be damned.

I got up this morning, wandered downstairs, and did my habitual log-in. And I see the forums.

blink.gif

QUOTE (Mata @ Jun 16 2003, 06:50 AM)
Well after reading Missy's thread I decided to go ahead and do it.


Tell me - what am I supposed to think of that? Mata just implemented a whole system of change... because of me?

No, I don't really believe that he did it because of me, really; I'm sure the idea's been floating around in his brilliant mind for a while now, and my departure just pushed it over the into reality, if anything, but...

The fact that Mata cared enough to do that strikes a chord with me. What this means as far as forum usage has yet to be determined.

A few notes in response to people's notes in here:

To cheese, elf, nordelen, and anyone else who thinks they're "to blame": Stop it. There's no sense in people blaming themselves for my leaving - especially when those that should be sorry probably won't be.

To InKy: You know I could never be far off from you. We'll still talk, regardless of what happens here. You are very close to my heart. <3<3<3

To the "older posters", you know who you are: Keep the memories alive. See if maybe there's a way to re-capture the spirit of the old forum. Maybe others won't have to leave then.

To gerbil: the fansite will be restored sometime today. I'm still a Matazone fan, no matter what, and I've decided that I'm not going to let this forum dictate whether I run it or not. I do not, however, apologize for anything said on the front page right now.

With all that said, I'll be in and out today, but I will probably not be posting.
vicrawr
*hugs Mis* I sorry, I haven't been to most intelligent person on here. sad.gif
MistressAlti
A note about the fansite (also posted in General Chat, where its original thread still lies):

Everything is back up. My rude statement has been removed and has been replaced with another official statement from me.

FanSite.

Read if you want.
Jonman
I hope you stick about and pop in from time to time, but even if you don't, take care of yourself, and be happy....

Jonman.
Pikasyuu
You're that important. I think Mata saw everyone getting upset with one another, and your leaving thread was the last straw. You're really important to everyone here, Missy. I hope you understand that. <3
Oni Usagi
Aww.
Do ya really gotta go Missy?
What a bummer, I always liked you, I think it has something to do with your av, but that's only how it started.
Will you still be in chat or anything?
It's not fun pickin on syuu ever since she got that thing that hangs off of her.
Jaq
I suppose I'm just dense. I never really notice the spam...unless I'm a spammer...am I a spammer? Gosh I hope not. You guys would tell me if I was, right? right? I just look at the little spam that gets through my dense cloak of dense denseness as junk mail. Skim it, ignore it and skip to the posts by people who you know are going to be interesting.

Missy, does your last couple posts mean you're not leaving? I hope you'll stay. Like syuu said, there's lots of people on the forums who make it worth coming back to day after day after day.. (but I'm not addicted, I swear)... If the spam bothers you so badly why not cultivate a little denseness? Works for me. tongue.gif
Mata
QUOTE
You're that important. I think Mata saw everyone getting upset with one another, and your leaving thread was the last straw.


Yep, Syuu's right. I hadn't really thought about what to do with the forums but seeing someone like yourself about to up and leave made me realise that something drastic was needed so I spent the day fiddling and I think that the board is a lot better for it.

I didn't actually have any plans to immediately change anything and it really was about 90% because of you. Leo and I had been PMing about the problem of spam for a couple of days and I had been trying to work out what to do, this thread really made it happen.

So... Thanks for posting it, sorry things got so dire that you felt you had to do this and I hope you like the new setup.

Things seem to be better on here or is that just me thinking that?
Mata
Oh yes, could you put a link to your site in your sig? That way it'll be easier for everyone to find smile.gif
MistressAlti
Hell, I don't even know what to say to that. I'm supposed to feel special, maybe... or I could consider myself a whiny biatch for having caused so much trouble in the first place... Eh... I'll try to lean towards the first.

No, it's not just you thinking that, Mata. I've been thinking that too, but I'm reluctant to say I'll stay. The forum layout has been effective - more effective than I thought it'd be - in putting a damper on the urgent problem of spamming. It has been so much easier to find the kinds of posts I enjoy reading like this. I thank you, for you attention to that issue.

Still, though, I find myself horribly split being going and staying. I recieved a lot of... shall I say... feedback... on what other forumites thought about what I'd posted. The support for me that's posted in this thread is only the tip of the iceberg. At the same time, there were others who had less than favorable views of my actions. Although the apologies have been traded and the flare-ups of emotion are over, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel that perhaps I'm still unwelcome here. And that's something I'm going to have to weigh out for myself, I guess...

I suppose everyone's seen me lurking about lately, though my posts are few and far between. Call it a testing of the water, if you will. I'm simply not ready to jump right back in, because I don't want to find myself drowning again at some later time.

I guess what I'm saying is that I haven't left yet because I'm re-evaluating my decision over again. What's been done so far has been enough to make me re-think things.

I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank everyone who's been so kind to me on these issues. Your words have meant a lot, and you've motivated me to reconsider everything.

And yes, I can put a link to my site in my sig.
ravein
Missy.. you are the alfrado on my noodles, the sauce on my pizza, the lime in my beer, the sunlight in my window seal ( can you stop showing up before 9 AM?????), You are the good CD in my CD player... you are Missy.. and if you leave.. I will be soooooooo mad at you....I swear... you will be... like... soooooooooooo off my Christmas card list biggrin.gif
MistressAlti
QUOTE (ravein @ Jun 19 2003, 08:39 AM)
Missy.. you are the alfrado on my noodles, the sauce on my pizza, the lime in my beer, the sunlight in my window seal ( can you stop showing up before 9 AM?????), You are the good CD in my CD player... you are Missy.. and if you leave.. I will be soooooooo mad at you....I swear... you will be... like... soooooooooooo off my Christmas card list biggrin.gif

LMAO, rave! You are so my hero for that one. laugh.gif laugh.gif

Well, I dunno if I could turn down a Christmas card... another thing to consider... happy.gif
ravein
see it is the little things that keep you here! Like my nudie christmas cards.. you should see the easter cards laugh.gif
MAtt
holy crap i pop back in to say hello and now missy has to go? (rymthige) This sucks. But it seems that the poeple who have been here from the begining are the only intelegint ones. Except me cuz i can't spell. Man im bummed.
MistressAlti
QUOTE (ravein @ Jun 19 2003, 12:14 PM)
see it is the little things that keep you here! Like my nudie christmas cards.. you should see the easter cards  laugh.gif

Oooh! Do they involve bunny ears and pastel colours? wink.gif laugh.gif
MAtt
QUOTE (MistressAlti @ Jun 19 2003, 10:29 AM)
QUOTE (ravein @ Jun 19 2003, 12:14 PM)
see it is the little things that keep you here! Like my nudie christmas cards.. you should see the easter cards laugh.gif

Oooh! Do they involve bunny ears and pastel colours? wink.gif laugh.gif

umm sure *matt trys to bring his brain up to speed*
MistressAlti
QUOTE (MAtt @ Jun 19 2003, 12:28 PM)
holy crap i pop back in to say hello and now missy has to go? (rymthige) This sucks. But it seems that the poeple who have been here from the begining are the only intelegint ones. Except me cuz i can't spell. Man im bummed.

Oh, MAtt, that's not true... there are intelligent new people too... and that's certainly not the point I wanted to make...

I don't know if I'm leaving or not anymore. You kinda missed the heat of the arguments.
ravein
why YES they do!!!! lol laugh.gif
MistressAlti
QUOTE (ravein @ Jun 19 2003, 12:31 PM)
why YES they do!!!! lol laugh.gif

/me sighs

More to ponder... must you make my decisions so difficult, ravein?
MAtt
QUOTE (MistressAlti @ Jun 19 2003, 10:34 AM)
QUOTE (ravein @ Jun 19 2003, 12:31 PM)
why YES they do!!!! lol  laugh.gif

/me sighs

More to ponder... must you make my decisions so difficult, ravein?

Me answer for ravein
"yes"
Yoda answers
"answer you have yessss"
I answer
"don't go cuz im back"
ravein
QUOTE (MistressAlti @ Jun 19 2003, 02:34 PM)
QUOTE (ravein @ Jun 19 2003, 12:31 PM)
why YES they do!!!! lol  laugh.gif

/me sighs

More to ponder... must you make my decisions so difficult, ravein?

Cause yoda is right... it is the way of the Jedi... trust the force missy.. is says stay.....stayyyyyy
MAtt
damn straight....im still feeling it from my post in the metal forum..damn
MistressAlti
Like I said, I'm thinking it over. Although my activity today was almost near normal levels... sleep.gif
ravein
see you cannot resist the mystic of the nudie christmas card!!! admit it!!!!! mwwahahaha...
well you think it over and let me know if anyone makes you think you might wanna leave again.. me and matt will take'm out back and use the force on them smile.gif

PS check it out...

<--------- it takes a non spammer with a life FOREVER to hit 1000!!! biggrin.gif
leopold
Fer one of yer nudie xmas cards, rave, I'd threaten ta leave too!!! wink.gif laugh.gif

Nice to see ya still wanderin in here missy! I hope that things stay nicely settled like they are now, cos it'd be a shame to lose ya after all this time...

<---- BTW, I have no life, hence the stupid count... laugh.gif
MistressAlti
As always, a preface to my ramblings: syuu's nostalgic post got me sniffling. Seriously. Because I know that the people who've stuck with me this long are just so important... I asked her permission if I could commit blatant copyright infringement, and I got the go-ahead, so here it is, in all its failing glory.
----------

Industrial Kybosh - Shit, how to even begin this. Lord knows that you've absolutely turned my life upside-down. You're beyond incredible. I didn't know God made angels as intelligent and sensitive as He made you. You never fail to amaze me, to impress me, to amuse me, to lift my spirits to the sky... I never could have imagined that one person could herald in such an era of change to someone as lost as me. You've been everything I could have ever asked for in an e-husband and in a best friend. I love you so dearly, and no amount of praise could truly echo the wonders I've found in you.

LoLo - My voice-chat buddy, not to mention the blog's greatest fan! My fellow creative girl, you understand the burden of the artistic soul, and you carry it with all the grace I lack. You keep such a humour about you that it's impossible not to think of you and smile. You have been there for me at every moment of my need, counseled me, cheered my soul in it's darkest moments. You are the very definition of what it means to be a true friend. I feel so honored to have shared this forum with you.

leopold - The master of pimping, the man above men, the great moddie Leo! (insert fanfare here) I will never think of the color turquoise the same! But in all seriousness, you've been my shoulder to cry on, the person I could always go to for an e-hug when I needed one. Together we mourned the absences of our dearest friends, and there was so much strength in knowing that I was not suffering alone. You've always made me feel so needed and protected here in the forums, and I could never thank you enough for that.

syuu - You're way too cool for me, hon... all I can say is WOW. It's a surprise we didn't swallow our pride and come together sooner than we did. We make a damn strong alliance. You're the funniest girl I've ever met, a partner in crime like none other. I will never forget that night when we finally came together in my moment of despair and found the perfect sounding board for our insanities. I've never had many female friends, especially not in my age bracket, and maybe that's why I treasure you so much. You're the diamond in all the coal we've found around us. It takes a truly strong and unique individual to be as awesome as you are. I wouldn't change a thing about you for the world.

Debaser - Erk! It's been absolutely wonderful having someone to talk to in my long afternoons at home. You're such a sweet and sensitive individual, and truly unique on top of that. It's good to know that I'm not alone, and even better that I have someone so willing to listen to me - even if it does mean that we trade dot conventions back and forth! Someday, when you finally get all the intravenous hookups, remember, you still have to sing for me drunk! laugh.gif I love you, man, you're totally awesome.

ravein - I may never know what we did at that one e-wedding reception, but I don't think it matters! Your shameless honesty and boundless wisdom has always given me so much respect for your fantastic self. You've always been so kind to me, and you're one of the few people that I thought was listening to anything I've ever said. That means so much to me. As do your nude Christmas cards... lmao! I have to say that you've been the singlemost instrumental person in convincing me to stay here, through your constant loyalty and understanding to me. I wish there was a way to thank you enough for what you've done.

Mata - Not only do you deserve boundless worship for making any of this possible in the first place, I want to thank you personally. I honestly didn't believe anyone would care too much that I was going to leave here, but the fact that you took notice spun my entire line of thinking around. It's not too often that you run across someone in such fame that bothers to even notice his fans, let alone their issues and problems! I was totally blown away that you posted in this thread and instituted such change in the forums on account of me... and what's most amazing is that you managed to fix things so that I don't even really feel it's necessary for me to leave anymore. Thank you so much for paying attention to little old me... it was a self-esteem boost, to be sure.

----------
I've just been at this post for the past 45 minutes now, and I've barely covered half of what I really want to say, but I simply can't be at this much longer...

There is a conclusion to all this, however: I have decided that I will not be leaving the forums. I came to this for various reasons, and I won't go into it in detail, for the sake of boring you all further with what I think about whatever.

I do want to thank everyone who showed such love and appreciation to me when I was so angry and hurt. I would never have guessed that I meant anything to so many people. But I suppose I've learned now, haven't I... and I feel so much better. Thank you, all of you.
Industrial Kybosh
...

Damnit...

I'm tearing up again here... the kids are going to lose what little respect they ever had for me...

*me hugs Missy, then everyone else*

...ahh, jeez... I love you...
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