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Phyllis
blegh. i once told my mom about my bulemia..when it was really bad...(at that time i was sort of underweight..and she kept gushing about how good i looked too)..and she said to me "don't blame me for your problems." i came to her b/c i thought "hey, maybe she'll get me some help." i never once insinuated that it was her fault in some way....just said "mom, i throw up after i eat." and she came back w/ "don't blame me".....and walked away.

i swear....she and i get along now, but sometimes when i think about this stuff it still just makes me so angry.
Rattgirl
I'm glad you and your mom can get along now...I gave up on mine a while back when she told me that A. If she ever found out I'd 'turned to paganism' she'd disown me (this is, of course, after I'd become Wiccan), and B. told me that no matter what I did in life, it would never be enough.

I love my mother, but at this point you'd have to pay me to get me within 100 yards of her.
LindyLouWho
Yeah, weight seems to be a problem for alot of people especiall in the US... lazy bastards that we are... aaaaaaaaaaaanyway for me its a big part of my low self esteem.... you cant be pretty or sexy or sensual if you are fat... at least thats what pop cult. (CULT) has drilled into my spongey grey matter...
nordelen
its not only america that has this problem Lindy; it is everywhere. as to the pop cult thing, well, the bigwig corperate a$$munchers have to make money somehow, and everyone knows that sex and sex appeal sells, so they see it as a way of making a quick killing by exploiting the market by only employing pretty barbie dolls to sell their shows/products (not to mention that they are also a bunch of perverted old codgers! laugh.gif ). as we all know, these corperate gits are ultimately as thick as breeze-blocks, and could'nt create something original if god himself came down and drew them a detailed diagram. i'm sure you knew this already, but i thought that it needed to be voiced.
Alanity
Grrrr...
My mum's like that, she always has to remind me of my weight thinking she's helping, she's seen the psychiatric unit that I went to,she's seen all the anorexic peeps there and has seen how much being presured into thinking weight's all that matters can fuck up your life, not to mention that my sister's had an eating disorder as long as I can remember, but she still seems to think that presuring me into losing weight is going to solve all my problems.. o..O
I don't give a shit if I'm a little podgy, I can still walk for hours without getting tired and it doesn't affect my life in any way other than my appearance which I'm not particualy fussed about.
LindyLouWho
Alanity, if your mom is like most people regarding the female form you probably arent even podgy, but just normally proportioned. ............. I have a q though... in the last two weeks or so I started using an exacto blade to cut designs into my skin, it doesnt hurt much at all and looks pretty cool. should I be worried?
wolfbane
Yes you should be because exacto knives can be extremely dangerous. They are a lot sharper than razor blades or 'regular' knives and you can do a lot more damage without realising it. As for it not hurting - that seems to be a normal thing. The deeper I cut the less it hurt - in fact the things that hurt the most are scratches I get from bluntish razors - the deep cuts I've got from knives don't hurt at all. I think part of that is that the body releases endorphins and adrenaline which mean that you don't notice the pain - it's part of the 'fight or flight' mechanism so that if youwere to be attacked you could run away without feeling too much pain. Just be careful to make sure you don't cut too deeply - it's very easy to do permenant damage.
Jaq
Wolfbane is right. Sharp knives and stuff can be really dangerous. If you really want to hurt yourself and absolutely must use knives use a serated knife, it's pretty much the same effect as razors/exacto knives but it won't cause as much scarring and unlike razors/exacto knives there's usually not much chance of cutting too deep.
LindyLouWho
At the moment I really wouldnt be too upset if I cut my self deep enough to bleed out right here on the floor but, I am really carefull not to cut very deep, in fact I hardly bleed. .. I think it would be more difficult to get a nice circle with a differnt blade... I had to recut the durn penticle like 4 times just so it would show up >.<... thanks for the advice though.
Alanity
QUOTE (LindyLouWho @ Jul 5 2003, 01:11 AM)
Alanity, if your mom is like most people regarding the female form you probably arent even podgy, but just normally proportioned. ............. I have a q though... in the last two weeks or so I started using an exacto blade to cut designs into my skin, it doesnt hurt much at all and looks pretty cool. should I be worried?

Uhhhhh... female form? I do people online always assume that? dry.gif Why do you think my username is Alanity?
Btw, you sure you're going to think it "looks pretty cool" if it scars permenantly?
LindyLouWho
:laugh.gif: sorry, most times women are the ones picked on for being heavy, sides Alanity is a feminine sounding handle.. at least to me tongue.gif it wont if it scars but shite I am not cutting deeply
porcelainwarrior
doesnt matter lindylou ... i didnt cut deep to start but one day the knife wasnt clean and i now have really bad scars cos infection went in even though i cleaned and everything ... im not trying to scare you but it really did happen to me and im a fecking mess for life now ...
wolfbane
Most scars tend to fade after a while, but I've got scars from where I've cut not too deeply and they are just as obvious as the ones where I have cut deeply. I'm going to have my scars for life, and while that doesn't bother me at the moment I'm aware that it might in the future. Just another warning for you... wink.gif
LindyLouWho
thanks for the warnings, I clean the blade before I do it
The.Wheezing.Ghost
I'm terrified of Snakes, Richard Simmons, ET, The scary man who lives across the street from me, things coming in the vicinity of my eyes, and Coarpes
WeeJ
QUOTE (LindyLouWho @ Jul 6 2003, 08:35 PM)
thanks for the warnings, I clean the blade before I do it

Still doesn't make it anywhere near safe. What if you were to cut through an important vein or something???
People don't realise how scary this kind of thing is...not in a social way, just the things that could happen to you if it was to go wrong.
WeeJ
QUOTE (wolfbane @ Jun 30 2003, 12:28 AM)
I'm on a messageboard which is a great system of support.

May i ask which message board this is???
LindyLouWho
bloody hell, I was doing ok, really, but my fiance has broken up with me.. fecking arse ::sigh:: so anyway all the meds arent doing much for me at the moment
wolfbane
*hugs*

I've got a friend who's going through something similar at the moment, and it's not an easy thing to have to deal with. I hope that you start to feel as though you can get through it soon, and try to stay safe...

Weej, the messageboard is part of the ezboard community. There are a few relating to SI on there.
LindyLouWho
::hugs:: I am waffling between defiant self interest and depressive obsession with what he is doing and thinking
Phyllis
QUOTE (motorcyclinchimp @ Jul 11 2003, 06:44 PM)
sometimes i have to blow my nose but i think thats it

coming in this thread and saying something like that is just so insulting to those who have actual problems that i am literally beyond words right now.

[Edit: I deleted the offending post. It's a criminal waste of bandwidth an an insult to those who have actual issues. I now return ya to yer normal viewing... leo]
cheese is funny
WE DO NOT TOLORATE SPAM IN SERIOUS THREADS! PLEASE LEAVE THESE THREADS SPAM FREE!
LindyLouWho
well tecnically it might be a mental problem seeing as his pea brain might come flying out mad.gif
kidvicious2punk
omg....anthony thats so stupid...i believe you lindy...maybe his huge ego problem and eagerness to ruin everything is an issue....

anyway....i think i have depression...donno if that would actually go on here...but ya...sorry to those of you who were disgusted by anthony and his stupidness... dry.gif
LindyLouWho
This would be the place KidV, you say you think you are depressed, have you considered going to a doctor about it?
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