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Jonman
QUOTE (Mata @ May 2 2003, 05:21 PM)
QUOTE
jonman why isn't the faq pinned???


I'll field that one.

There's a FAQ about the site on the main page, that's not part of the board so can't be pinned.

The help newbies thread: Well, I'll think about it. If anything perhaps we should pin it in the intro section, rather than here, but then again I'm not sure if anyone ever reads these things. I wonder how many people actually bother to read The Rules....

Essentially the answer is that I've been animating for five hours solid now and my brain has melted. Does that help?

Cheers buddy,

I was going to waffle on about the Dolphins of Doom, who'd nicked all my pins to use to torment cute seahorses with, but you saved me the bother.

*phew*

Anyway, 5 hours? Blimmin lightweight. I've been working on the airplace since 7 this morning (it's now half 12). Now I'm going to fly around on it all afternoon, and should be clear of work by about 9 tonight.

So nerr.
craziness
i would just like to say thank you mata for melting your brain for people with no life like me
LoLo
Dear Jonman,

Why do I have such badluck lately?

Thank you,
Some unlucky chick
Pikasyuu
Dear Jonman --
I have two. Why did they invent the pita, and what made you decide to be an agony uncle? Just curious.

-- Syuu
cheese is funny
dear jonman!

heres an important one that has bugging me FOREVER! its even made me lose sleep over... i think about it night and day... its something that you need to answer for me... or ill go insane and throw fish at pigeons...

anyways... the question is: whats mata's IQ?

hehe... am i a loser or what? haha
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 2 2003, 11:25 PM)
dear jonman!

heres an important one that has bugging me FOREVER! its even made me lose sleep over... i think about it night and day... its something that you need to answer for me... or ill go insane and throw fish at pigeons...

anyways... the question is: whats mata's IQ?

hehe... am i a loser or what? haha

o.O ...
cheese is funny
QUOTE (syuu @ May 2 2003, 11:27 PM)
o.O ...

O.o
Jonman
QUOTE (LoLo @ May 2 2003, 09:45 PM)
Dear Jonman,

Why do I have such badluck lately?

Thank you,
Some unlucky chick

Dear Lo,

Life's swings and roundabouts medear. Up and down, then around a bit, until you get dizzy, fall over and vomit.

Blimey, that was supposed to be silly, but it's actually quite profound.

Go me.
Jonman
QUOTE (syuu @ May 2 2003, 11:23 PM)
Dear Jonman --
I have two. Why did they invent the pita, and what made you decide to be an agony uncle? Just curious.

-- Syuu

Dear syuu,

1: the pita was invented for the sole purpose of being lightly grilled, stuffed choc-full of greasy lamb meat mostly made up from elbows and eyelids, doused in limp salad and eye-bleedingly hot chilli sauce and devoured after faaar too much beer, resulting in stomach cramps, diarohhea and a strange smell that lingers on your fingers, no matter how much you wash them. How I love kebabs (or gyros if you're american).

2: I figured it'd be a bit of a chuckle one day when the forum was quiet, but it's turned out be hugely rewarding. You could say I've taken to it like a basketball playing mouse takes to really small Nike Airs.
Jonman
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 2 2003, 11:25 PM)
dear jonman!

heres an important one that has bugging me FOREVER! its even made me lose sleep over... i think about it night and day... its something that you need to answer for me... or ill go insane and throw fish at pigeons...

anyways... the question is: whats mata's IQ?

hehe... am i a loser or what? haha

Dear cheese.

Don't throw fish at pigeons, whatever you do. While it's true that pigeons are inherently evil, and deserve to be punished for being beady-eyed flying buggers, you should't waste precious fish for such a purpose. Use stones, dice, dwarves or antique furntiure to pelt the winged sods instead.

Secondly, according to the Playstation game Kurushi, Mata's IQ is somewhere around 400. Mind you, you might want to take that with a pinch of salt, as said game has rated my IQ at over 600.

Hope that helps.
cheese is funny
dear jonman,

2 questions-

1) isnt 400 and 600 REALLY high for an IQ? whoa... you two must be some kind of uber geniuses or something...

2) you have 500posts now, you plan on giving yourself a cool custom title? if so, what will it be?
Jonman
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 3 2003, 03:51 AM)
dear jonman,

2 questions-

1) isnt 400 and 600 REALLY high for an IQ? whoa... you two must be some kind of uber geniuses or something...

2) you have 500posts now, you plan on giving yourself a cool custom title? if so, what will it be?

Yes. Mata and I are have actually reached a plane on intellectual existence hitherto unforeseen or unexperienced by man, beast or armchair. While he's pondering the eternal questions of existence, I'm using my awesome mental powers to get free fish products, and convince americans that I'm from Texas.

The thought occurred to me, but haven't had time to ponder what to change it to. How does one go about that anyway?
CrissiLove
(hey jonman! smile.gif when you go to My Controls click on "Edit Profile Info" on the menu to the left... then the text box to put it should be at the top smile.gif )
cheese is funny
QUOTE (Jonman @ May 3 2003, 03:55 AM)
The thought occurred to me, but haven't had time to ponder what to change it to.

ok, heres some sugesstions (i cant spell right now)

1) the forum agony uncle
2) the man with the J in the back of his head
3) i know mata!!!

i dont know... ill think of more later....
CrissiLove
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 2 2003, 10:02 PM)
QUOTE (Jonman @ May 3 2003, 03:55 AM)
The thought occurred to me, but haven't had time to ponder what to change it to.

ok, heres some sugesstions (i cant spell right now)

1) the forum agony uncle
2) the man with the J in the back of his head
3) i know mata!!!

i dont know... ill think of more later....

(those are good ones smile.gif )
Jonman
That'll do for the time being. Cheers Crissi.
CrissiLove
QUOTE (Jonman @ May 2 2003, 10:07 PM)
That'll do for the time being. Cheers Crissi.

(Cheers wink.gif Like the title... smile.gif )
cheese is funny
lol

great title jonman
Pikasyuu
Dear Jonman --
I made a jackass of myself yet again. Whaddo I do? ;_; Oh! The shame.

-- ever needing your help, lest all life falls apart. Sad? syuu.
Jonman
QUOTE (syuu @ May 3 2003, 05:59 AM)
Dear Jonman --
I made a jackass of myself yet again. Whaddo I do? ;_; Oh! The shame.

-- ever needing your help, lest all life falls apart. Sad? syuu.

Dear syuu.

Continue making a jackass of yourself. Do it lots. That way, folk will be led to believe that being a jackass is your natural state, and will be pleasantly suprised when their low expectations of your behaviour are exceeded.

Hope that helps,
Jonman
LoLo
Dear Jonman,

When will the baked beans guy ever stop trusting his dog with the recipe? He keeps catching him trying to sell it or tell people. How can he be so stupid? I say he needs to put that dog to sleep.

Sincerely,
TV Junkie last night
Pikasyuu
Dear Jonman --
Why does my mom insist on buying cases upon cases of salsa, and not getting any tortilla chips with it? She isn't using the salsa for anything else.

-- Syuu
Jonman
QUOTE (LoLo @ May 3 2003, 04:41 PM)
Dear Jonman,

When will the baked beans guy ever stop trusting his dog with the recipe? He keeps catching him trying to sell it or tell people. How can he be so stupid? I say he needs to put that dog to sleep.

Sincerely,
TV Junkie last night

It's the oldest story in the book.

Boy meets dog,
Dog steals baked bean recipe,
Man catches dog.

How many times will we be forced to see it twisted into 'novel' ways. I for one am sick of it.
Jonman
QUOTE (syuu @ May 3 2003, 07:47 PM)
Dear Jonman --
Why does my mom insist on buying cases upon cases of salsa, and not getting any tortilla chips with it? She isn't using the salsa for anything else.

-- Syuu

Dear syuu,

Is your mother a salsa saleswoman, who gets paid a percentage of what she sells? This could explain a lot. Maybe she's been doing it in secret. Do some detective work and see what you can find out.

If you find a false moustache in her dresser, confront her with it, and tell her that the game is up.
MistressAlti
Dear Jonman...

Why must real life take all my forum buddies away from me... ?

>cries<
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (Jonman @ May 4 2003, 01:30 AM)
QUOTE (syuu @ May 3 2003, 07:47 PM)
Dear Jonman --
Why does my mom insist on buying cases upon cases of salsa, and not getting any tortilla chips with it? She isn't using the salsa for anything else.

-- Syuu

Dear syuu,

Is your mother a salsa saleswoman, who gets paid a percentage of what she sells? This could explain a lot. Maybe she's been doing it in secret. Do some detective work and see what you can find out.

If you find a false moustache in her dresser, confront her with it, and tell her that the game is up.

Dear Jonman --
If I find a moustache, could she also be a lesbian? That would be hilarious. Two homosexuals uniting to form .. me. Nyahaha. o.o

-- Syuu
cheese is funny
dear jonman,

my dad is over controlling and he likes to controll my life in every way possable and i think he gets a power rush from it... every time im gonna do something that needs planning ahead for (like the concert im going to next weekend, which he threatened me just this morning over) he says stuff like "if i was going to -------- in a week, and i didnt do exactly what my dad told me to do, i wouldnt be aloud to go... but ya'know, thats just me...."

i need help... hes dumb....
Jonman
QUOTE (MistressAlti @ May 4 2003, 01:34 AM)
Dear Jonman...

Why must real life take all my forum buddies away from me... ?

>cries<

Cos real life sucks.

Unless you're me, in which case it's spanking.
Jonman
QUOTE (syuu @ May 4 2003, 01:35 AM)
Dear Jonman --
If I find a moustache, could she also be a lesbian? That would be hilarious. Two homosexuals uniting to form .. me. Nyahaha. o.o

-- Syuu

Possibly, but a false moustache does not a moo-muncher make. That'd be mostly circumstancial. Although it could be indicative of her secret hobby of pretending to be a postman. Look for letters with made up addresses on them (e.g. Mrs. PantyWhistler, 3 Big Bum Cottages, Titsville) that may be lying around the house. As before, confront her.
Jonman
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 4 2003, 01:36 AM)
dear jonman,

my dad is over controlling and he likes to controll my life in every way possable and i think he gets a power rush from it... every time im gonna do something that needs planning ahead for (like the concert im going to next weekend, which he threatened me just this morning over) he says stuff like "if i was going to -------- in a week, and i didnt do exactly what my dad told me to do, i wouldnt be aloud to go... but ya'know, thats just me...."

i need help... hes dumb....

Out of my realm that one our kid - I was raised by me mum, so all this dad malarky's the Great Unknown to me.

Here's a ker-azy idea. Try doing as he suggests instead of instinctively riling against his every ruling. Maybe, just maybe, he's sometimes got a point. Then again, maybe he's a monkey brained buffoon.
cheese is funny
QUOTE (Jonman @ May 4 2003, 02:00 AM)
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 4 2003, 01:36 AM)
dear jonman,

my dad is over controlling and he likes to controll my life in every way possable and i think he gets a power rush from it... every time im gonna do something that needs planning ahead for (like the concert im going to next weekend, which he threatened me just this morning over) he says stuff like "if i was going to -------- in a week, and i didnt do exactly what my dad told me to do, i wouldnt be aloud to go... but ya'know, thats just me...."

i need help... hes dumb....

Out of my realm that one our kid - I was raised by me mum, so all this dad malarky's the Great Unknown to me.

Here's a ker-azy idea. Try doing as he suggests instead of instinctively riling against his every ruling. Maybe, just maybe, he's sometimes got a point. Then again, maybe he's a monkey brained buffoon.

but i do what he says... its only when i am really busy he askes me to do stuff when i want to do something... he just need power trips...
Pikasyuu
Dear Jonman --
I'm really, really sorry about bugging you with all my lame ass problems, but right now I don't really have anyone else to go to about them. And you're an adult. ._. Urgh. I'm sorry.

My mom hates my sister because my sister hates her. So now my step-dad wont let my sister see either of us any more. I think he's moving out now, like my real dad did. I yelled at my mom for being so rude and shallow about my sister, and then she told me that my step-dad sued her for thirty-thousand over an accident they both were nearly killed in sometime last year. She's having surgery in a week, and she says that as of late, she may have developed cancer. My step-dad has been there for me for a very long time, since we were alone and my dad left. He provides for me a lot, and pretty much buys all my clothes and food and whatnot. They got engaged, but now they're sleeping in separate rooms and not speaking to eachother. I just want to be left to myself, but I can't move out for another three years. I don't know who to trust any more. This whole thing happened with my biological father. They said he was in trouble with the IRS, he denied it, they said he was homosexual, he denied it, he said my mother broke his heart with some other things she did, and they denied it. I obviously can't get away from these people, what the hell do I do?

-- sorry again, Syuu x.x
Jonman
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 4 2003, 02:06 AM)
but i do what he says... its only when i am really busy he askes me to do stuff when i want to do something... he just need power trips...

I'd like to think that he's got your best interests at heart, but obviously, not knowing the situation, I can't really comment on that. It's probably very likely that what he thinks is in your best interests isn't what you think is.

I'm all out of ideas m'afriad.

*shrugs*
Jonman
QUOTE (syuu @ May 4 2003, 02:51 AM)
Dear Jonman --
I'm really, really sorry about bugging you with all my lame ass problems, but right now I don't really have anyone else to go to about them. And you're an adult. ._. Urgh. I'm sorry.

My mom hates my sister because my sister hates her. So now my step-dad wont let my sister see either of us any more. I think he's moving out now, like my real dad did. I yelled at my mom for being so rude and shallow about my sister, and then she told me that my step-dad sued her for thirty-thousand over an accident they both were nearly killed in sometime last year. She's having surgery in a week, and she says that as of late, she may have developed cancer. My step-dad has been there for me for a very long time, since we were alone and my dad left. He provides for me a lot, and pretty much buys all my clothes and food and whatnot. They got engaged, but now they're sleeping in separate rooms and not speaking to eachother. I just want to be left to myself, but I can't move out for another three years. I don't know who to trust any more. This whole thing happened with my biological father. They said he was in trouble with the IRS, he denied it, they said he was homosexual, he denied it, he said my mother broke his heart with some other things she did, and they denied it. I obviously can't get away from these people, what the hell do I do?

-- sorry again, Syuu x.x

Firstly, not to worry - that's what agony uncling is all about. You could say it's my raison d'etre, but that would just be being poncy.

As to your situation, that's a shitty stick and no mistake. It sounds to me like your mum and stepdad have some pretty serious problems between themselves, and I'd probably recommend not getting involved in their personal problems. That's kind of between them, and by the sounds of things, it's got to the point where your involvement would probably be seen as taking sides by one (if not both) parties, and would likely muddy already very murky waters. They're going to have to work this one out for themselves, and no matter the outcome one way or the other, you've got to accept it.

As for your mum's health, that's big-time shitty news, and the last thing any of you need at the moment. The only advice I can give for that one is to support your mum through it as best you can, emotionally and physically.

As for not being able to see your sister, that sucks ass. I realise that this is an emotionally charged situation, but have you explained calmly, and without making reference to their situation with each other, that you'd still like to see your sister, as, well, she's your sister? If you go down that path, try and stay calm, not get into an argument over it. It may not be easy.

And in general, if it's really getting you down, (and this sounds like weak, dumb advice), try getting out of the house and doing something just for you that's fun, and you've wanted to try. Like joining a local club for doing whatever it is you fancy doing, whether it's canoeing, knitting, juggling or rock-climbing. That'll not only give you something to immerse yourself in that's pure fun for you, you'll no doubt meet a bunch of interesting folks.

My advice-glands are now officially dry - hope my very few pearlets of wisdom help in some small way.

Jonman.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (Jonman @ May 4 2003, 03:13 AM)
QUOTE (syuu @ May 4 2003, 02:51 AM)


Dear Jonman --
I'm really, really sorry about bugging you with all my lame ass problems, but right now I don't really have anyone else to go to about them. And you're an adult. ._. Urgh. I'm sorry.

My mom hates my sister because my sister hates her. So now my step-dad wont let my sister see either of us any more. I think he's moving out now, like my real dad did. I yelled at my mom for being so rude and shallow about my sister, and then she told me that my step-dad sued her for thirty-thousand over an accident they both were nearly killed in sometime last year. She's having surgery in a week, and she says that as of late, she may have developed cancer. My step-dad has been there for me for a very long time, since we were alone and my dad left. He provides for me a lot, and pretty much buys all my clothes and food and whatnot. They got engaged, but now they're sleeping in separate rooms and not speaking to eachother. I just want to be left to myself, but I can't move out for another three years. I don't know who to trust any more. This whole thing happened with my biological father. They said he was in trouble with the IRS, he denied it, they said he was homosexual, he denied it, he said my mother broke his heart with some other things she did, and they denied it. I obviously can't get away from these people, what the hell do I do?

-- sorry again, Syuu x.x

Firstly, not to worry - that's what agony uncling is all about. You could say it's my raison d'etre, but that would just be being poncy.

As to your situation, that's a shitty stick and no mistake. It sounds to me like your mum and stepdad have some pretty serious problems between themselves, and I'd probably recommend not getting involved in their personal problems. That's kind of between them, and by the sounds of things, it's got to the point where your involvement would probably be seen as taking sides by one (if not both) parties, and would likely muddy already very murky waters. They're going to have to work this one out for themselves, and no matter the outcome one way or the other, you've got to accept it.

As for your mum's health, that's big-time shitty news, and the last thing any of you need at the moment. The only advice I can give for that one is to support your mum through it as best you can, emotionally and physically.

As for not being able to see your sister, that sucks ass. I realise that this is an emotionally charged situation, but have you explained calmly, and without making reference to their situation with each other, that you'd still like to see your sister, as, well, she's your sister? If you go down that path, try and stay calm, not get into an argument over it. It may not be easy.

And in general, if it's really getting you down, (and this sounds like weak, dumb advice), try getting out of the house and doing something just for you that's fun, and you've wanted to try. Like joining a local club for doing whatever it is you fancy doing, whether it's canoeing, knitting, juggling or rock-climbing. That'll not only give you something to immerse yourself in that's pure fun for you, you'll no doubt meet a bunch of interesting folks.

My advice-glands are now officially dry - hope my very few pearlets of wisdom help in some small way.

Jonman.

x_x; Thank you so much. I am forever in debt to ya'. And oh shit x.x; your glands. Here uh. Drink agony uncle juice. o_o It's like gatorade, but less salty?
cheese is funny
dear jonman,

first of all, let me just say your intelligence is limitless, and i thank you for doing this (youve changed my life in a really good way)

now for my question (its a non-serious one hehe)

now i know your good at helping people with their problems, but when you get problems you cant handle by yourself, is there someone you consider an agony uncle? some even smarter guy that can help you? (is it even possable?)

sincerly,

that one guy who askes dumb questions
Pikasyuu
Maybe his agony uncle is Mata?
Jonman
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 4 2003, 03:20 AM)
dear jonman,

first of all, let me just say your intelligence is limitless, and i thank you for doing this (youve changed my life in a really good way)

now for my question (its a non-serious one hehe)

now i know your good at helping people with their problems, but when you get problems you cant handle by yourself, is there someone you consider an agony uncle? some even smarter guy that can help you? (is it even possable?)

sincerly,

that one guy who askes dumb questions

Dear Cheese,

It's a good question actually, and one I'd not thought about. I suppose on the rare occasions when I do stumble into a situation that knocks me for six, I turn to my friends for advice (well, some of them anyway). In fact the last crisis I had, which was a couple of years ago, I did indeed turn to Mata, not so much for advice as such, but as a sounding board to bounce my thoughts off. He knows me as well as, if not better than most, and was indeed a great help (if you're reading Mata, we're talking about the Jen situation).

However, due mainly to the type of person I am, it's rare for me to come up against something I can't think my way through. I'm not saying I always make the right decision, but being able to coldly and objectively view things, weigh them up and evaluate them, and come to rational conclusions, I normally muddle through. It's precisely this mindset that's to blame for me being an engineer - that kind of realistic pragmatic approach is pretty much what engineering is all about, which is why it suits me as a career so well.

And thanks for your thanks, it makes doing this all the more worthwhile.

Cheers,
Jonman
Jaq
QUOTE (Jonman @ May 4 2003, 03:13 AM)
QUOTE (syuu @ May 4 2003, 02:51 AM)


Dear Jonman --
I'm really, really sorry about bugging you with all my lame ass problems, but right now I don't really have anyone else to go to about them. And you're an adult. ._. Urgh. I'm sorry.

My mom hates my sister because my sister hates her. So now my step-dad wont let my sister see either of us any more. I think he's moving out now, like my real dad did. I yelled at my mom for being so rude and shallow about my sister, and then she told me that my step-dad sued her for thirty-thousand over an accident they both were nearly killed in sometime last year. She's having surgery in a week, and she says that as of late, she may have developed cancer. My step-dad has been there for me for a very long time, since we were alone and my dad left. He provides for me a lot, and pretty much buys all my clothes and food and whatnot. They got engaged, but now they're sleeping in separate rooms and not speaking to eachother. I just want to be left to myself, but I can't move out for another three years. I don't know who to trust any more. This whole thing happened with my biological father. They said he was in trouble with the IRS, he denied it, they said he was homosexual, he denied it, he said my mother broke his heart with some other things she did, and they denied it. I obviously can't get away from these people, what the hell do I do?

-- sorry again, Syuu x.x

Firstly, not to worry - that's what agony uncling is all about. You could say it's my raison d'etre, but that would just be being poncy.

As to your situation, that's a shitty stick and no mistake. It sounds to me like your mum and stepdad have some pretty serious problems between themselves, and I'd probably recommend not getting involved in their personal problems. That's kind of between them, and by the sounds of things, it's got to the point where your involvement would probably be seen as taking sides by one (if not both) parties, and would likely muddy already very murky waters. They're going to have to work this one out for themselves, and no matter the outcome one way or the other, you've got to accept it.

As for your mum's health, that's big-time shitty news, and the last thing any of you need at the moment. The only advice I can give for that one is to support your mum through it as best you can, emotionally and physically.

As for not being able to see your sister, that sucks ass. I realise that this is an emotionally charged situation, but have you explained calmly, and without making reference to their situation with each other, that you'd still like to see your sister, as, well, she's your sister? If you go down that path, try and stay calm, not get into an argument over it. It may not be easy.

And in general, if it's really getting you down, (and this sounds like weak, dumb advice), try getting out of the house and doing something just for you that's fun, and you've wanted to try. Like joining a local club for doing whatever it is you fancy doing, whether it's canoeing, knitting, juggling or rock-climbing. That'll not only give you something to immerse yourself in that's pure fun for you, you'll no doubt meet a bunch of interesting folks.

My advice-glands are now officially dry - hope my very few pearlets of wisdom help in some small way.

Jonman.

Dear Syuu:

I have to agree with Jonman concerning your problems. He gives good advice on all of the issues but I want to emphasize one thing that he may think is not as important. You have to remember to take care of yourself while you're going through this crappy time. Getting out of the house and getting your mind off the problems at home may be the one thing standing between you and depression or another serious psychological or even physical problem. You would not be betraying your family by getting out of the house and deciding not to deal with their problems for a couple nights a week.

Taking up juggling is a keen idea, and talking with a good friend about your problems is a better one. Just ranting about stresses and problems to a friend always makes me feel, if not great, at least better. Sometimes when we feel powerless to stop something, talking about it or writing it down will help. Writing it down especially (which you've already done. Hey! Took my advice before I said it!) will help you organize your thoughts and see on paper just what you're dealing with. You can look at your problems with a little bit of objectivity and think of ways to solve them. This works better for less serious problems, but I think it still has merit...

I hope that these shitty problems will work themselves out eventually. It really sucks being this powerless to help the people that you love and getting caught up in all of these problems that are out of your hands but not out of your head. Please do remember to get out of the house with your friends at least a couple times a week. It'll make you feel much more energetic and, who knows, you just might enjoy some of your youth.

I'm afraid that little bit is all the wisdom I can leave you for tonight.

Sticking her two cents in
Auntie Jaq
Jonman
QUOTE (Jaq @ May 4 2003, 05:27 AM)
Sticking her two cents in
Auntie Jaq

Thanks Jaq,

wise words indeed.
cheese is funny
dear jonman,

do you think pie is better then cake?
Jonman
QUOTE (cheese is funny @ May 4 2003, 07:00 PM)
dear jonman,

do you think pie is better then cake?

Ah, another of these problems with differing interpretations of words depending on which side of the Atlantic you're from. For Americans, pie is a sweet dish eaten for dessert. This type of pie is obviously inferior to the wondrous and delicious sin that is cake.

However, in the UK, pie is strictly a savoury dish, usually eaten as part of the main course of a meal. It can be encased in pastry (like a pot pie), or topped with mash potato (like a shepards pie). Anyone who's not experienced the awe and majesty that is a Steak and Kidney Pukka Pie with chips, scraps and gravy simply hasn't lived. For that reason alone, the pie wins. Not to mention the beauty of fish pie (which I make a mean one of as it happens). Think. Fish. and pie.

Wow.
Pikasyuu
QUOTE (Jaq @ May 4 2003, 05:27 AM)
QUOTE (Jonman @ May 4 2003, 03:13 AM)
QUOTE (syuu @ May 4 2003, 02:51 AM)


Dear Jonman --
I'm really, really sorry about bugging you with all my lame ass problems, but right now I don't really have anyone else to go to about them. And you're an adult. ._. Urgh. I'm sorry.

My mom hates my sister because my sister hates her. So now my step-dad wont let my sister see either of us any more. I think he's moving out now, like my real dad did. I yelled at my mom for being so rude and shallow about my sister, and then she told me that my step-dad sued her for thirty-thousand over an accident they both were nearly killed in sometime last year. She's having surgery in a week, and she says that as of late, she may have developed cancer. My step-dad has been there for me for a very long time, since we were alone and my dad left. He provides for me a lot, and pretty much buys all my clothes and food and whatnot. They got engaged, but now they're sleeping in separate rooms and not speaking to eachother. I just want to be left to myself, but I can't move out for another three years. I don't know who to trust any more. This whole thing happened with my biological father. They said he was in trouble with the IRS, he denied it, they said he was homosexual, he denied it, he said my mother broke his heart with some other things she did, and they denied it. I obviously can't get away from these people, what the hell do I do?

-- sorry again, Syuu x.x

Firstly, not to worry - that's what agony uncling is all about. You could say it's my raison d'etre, but that would just be being poncy.

As to your situation, that's a shitty stick and no mistake. It sounds to me like your mum and stepdad have some pretty serious problems between themselves, and I'd probably recommend not getting involved in their personal problems. That's kind of between them, and by the sounds of things, it's got to the point where your involvement would probably be seen as taking sides by one (if not both) parties, and would likely muddy already very murky waters. They're going to have to work this one out for themselves, and no matter the outcome one way or the other, you've got to accept it.

As for your mum's health, that's big-time shitty news, and the last thing any of you need at the moment. The only advice I can give for that one is to support your mum through it as best you can, emotionally and physically.

As for not being able to see your sister, that sucks ass. I realise that this is an emotionally charged situation, but have you explained calmly, and without making reference to their situation with each other, that you'd still like to see your sister, as, well, she's your sister? If you go down that path, try and stay calm, not get into an argument over it. It may not be easy.

And in general, if it's really getting you down, (and this sounds like weak, dumb advice), try getting out of the house and doing something just for you that's fun, and you've wanted to try. Like joining a local club for doing whatever it is you fancy doing, whether it's canoeing, knitting, juggling or rock-climbing. That'll not only give you something to immerse yourself in that's pure fun for you, you'll no doubt meet a bunch of interesting folks.

My advice-glands are now officially dry - hope my very few pearlets of wisdom help in some small way.

Jonman.

Dear Syuu:

I have to agree with Jonman concerning your problems. He gives good advice on all of the issues but I want to emphasize one thing that he may think is not as important. You have to remember to take care of yourself while you're going through this crappy time. Getting out of the house and getting your mind off the problems at home may be the one thing standing between you and depression or another serious psychological or even physical problem. You would not be betraying your family by getting out of the house and deciding not to deal with their problems for a couple nights a week.

Taking up juggling is a keen idea, and talking with a good friend about your problems is a better one. Just ranting about stresses and problems to a friend always makes me feel, if not great, at least better. Sometimes when we feel powerless to stop something, talking about it or writing it down will help. Writing it down especially (which you've already done. Hey! Took my advice before I said it!) will help you organize your thoughts and see on paper just what you're dealing with. You can look at your problems with a little bit of objectivity and think of ways to solve them. This works better for less serious problems, but I think it still has merit...

I hope that these shitty problems will work themselves out eventually. It really sucks being this powerless to help the people that you love and getting caught up in all of these problems that are out of your hands but not out of your head. Please do remember to get out of the house with your friends at least a couple times a week. It'll make you feel much more energetic and, who knows, you just might enjoy some of your youth.

I'm afraid that little bit is all the wisdom I can leave you for tonight.

Sticking her two cents in
Auntie Jaq

Thanks very much, both of you. It's always extremely appreciated. I took your advice of course, and I've been talking to m'best friend who happens to have an uncanny way of solving situations and making them look minute as well. Also, after ranting it off to you agony people, it did lift a weight off'a my shoulders so that I could concentrate on more important things. Like making damn well sure the corp. voice guy stays on survivor, or going to a local punk show. Egh, I missed ska summit anyway. But yeah, other than that crap, thanks. o.-;
LoLo
Dear Jonman,

Why do people like to worship symbols?

Sincerely,
Couldn't think of something else to ask
cheese is funny
QUOTE (syuu @ May 4 2003, 09:48 PM)
I missed ska summit anyway.

i missed it too! sad.gif
Pikasyuu
sucks huh. :\
leopold
Dear Jonman,

I've got a problem... I've got this really great online friend, an we've spent a lot of time chattin and emailin an such. However, me time online has been takin over me life an I wanna cut back on it a lot, as it's havin a negative effect on me life.

That said, I don't wanna lose touch with her. I've been tryin to explain to her why I'm cuttin back on the online time, but I seem ta keep puttin me foot in it an upsettin her... I end up sayin stupid things like I'm chattin with her out of habit, when what I really wanna say is that I love her dearly an I want us to stay friends.

So me question is this... can ya help me say what I want to tell her?? I'm not thinkin too clearly an I'm afraid I'll just end up losin a great friend cos I'm too stupid to tell her what I wanna say...

Yours,
None too happy
Jonman
QUOTE (LoLo @ May 4 2003, 09:50 PM)
Dear Jonman,

Why do people like to worship symbols?

Sincerely,
Couldn't think of something else to ask

What, like the @ symbol?

You must know some funny people.
cheese is funny
dear jonman,

this has been bugging me lately... why do girls always say they dont look beautiful? it happened again today and when i said she was beautiful, she said i had bad taste in girls... can you explain it to me? im just a confused little boy that doesnt understand girls and ladies lol
Jonman
QUOTE (leopold @ May 4 2003, 10:03 PM)
Dear Jonman,

I've got a problem... I've got this really great online friend, an we've spent a lot of time chattin and emailin an such. However, me time online has been takin over me life an I wanna cut back on it a lot, as it's havin a negative effect on me life.

That said, I don't wanna lose touch with her. I've been tryin to explain to her why I'm cuttin back on the online time, but I seem ta keep puttin me foot in it an upsettin her... I end up sayin stupid things like I'm chattin with her out of habit, when what I really wanna say is that I love her dearly an I want us to stay friends.

So me question is this... can ya help me say what I want to tell her?? I'm not thinkin too clearly an I'm afraid I'll just end up losin a great friend cos I'm too stupid to tell her what I wanna say...

Yours,
None too happy

Dear Leo,

How's about just telling her that you love her dearly and want to stay friends? Cut the BS, and just be honest. Stop skirting around the issue: talk plainly. Tell her that you need to get back into the real world, but don't want that to impact your relationship, and that it's not a reflection on the way you think about her. Assuming all of that's true, which by the sounds of things it is.

I've been thinking about this kind of stuff a lot of late, thinking back on previous relationships that I've been through, and to be honest, I'm quite disgusted with myself at how little I actually expressed the way I was feeling in favour of saying what I thought they wanted to hear. I've since vowed to stop doing it, and to be brutally honest. So far, it's working well. Most people aren't actually used to hearing dead truth, and find it quite refreshing.

Anyway, hope that helps, big fella, and hope you still pop in from time to time.
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