Help - Search - Members - Calendar
Full Version: Opinion... I'm New
The Other Side forums - suitable for mature readers! > The Other Side forums > The Issues Forum
Pages: 1, 2
cuttingallover
okay, im new to the website... i was looking for people to talk to abut cutting, now i know its a much debated topic, but im really trying to look for better ways to deal with stress and im not sure what to do or where to turn to, i mean i have a phsych but he told me to come back witha list of things i can do besides cutting, but still cause pain but in a healthy way...
alls i need is some insight please??!
Silver Star Angel of Da Towers
You could take your stress out creatively, like in painting or music.
gothictheysay
Unfortunately, your want for pain is a problem too. =\ It's probably preferable you find another way entirely to deal with the stress - like what Silver said - but you could always work out or lift heavy things like I did and have sore arms the next day... but hopefully you should be able to work something out that doesn't actually cause pain but releases stress.
PsychWardMike
*sigh*

Anyway, if you want to actually stop doing that kind of stuff, you simply need to live life. Realize that problems are pretty miniscule in comparison to everything and that life is pretty good all and all. Work out, make friends, do something, but just don't be a cancer on teenage (and all) society.

Life is what you make of it - make something worth lving.
Righteous
(sigh)

Go out there. Get a life. Get a hobby. Join a band. Smoke some pot. Go have an Eskimo pie. Work out. Get a job. Run a mile. Do something. It's all in your hands.
Aria
Exercise, but be sure you don't over do it. Exercise is possibly the only "good" pain I can think of. Take up something like jogging.

As for cutting, I used to do it. I sort of weaned myself off of the selfhurt by going from cutting to burning with candlewax, which hurts for a bit, but doesn't generally cause any serious injury, and then just plain stopped. Dunno if it would work for you, but it might be worth a try.
Aria
QUOTE (PsychWardMike @ Aug 29 2004, 12:18 AM)
*sigh*

Anyway, if you want to actually stop doing that kind of stuff, you simply need to live life.  Realize that problems are pretty miniscule in comparison to everything and that life is pretty good all and all.  Work out, make friends, do something, but just don't be a cancer on teenage (and all) society.

Life is what you make of it - make something worth lving.
*



Eh... It's not that easy if the person has clinical depression, or is bipolar or some such. it's not that simple.

Sorry, I just hate it when people trivialize depression. It is damn hard to live with. And it is NOT something you can snap out of.
gothictheysay
Very true, Aria.

This a problem that's probably something you should talk about with your psychiatrist/psychologist or whoever you are seeing. I wouldn't take too much outside advice. Although, I would be careful with what other behaviors you pick up once you stop. If your self-injury is addictive, it's easy to turn to other addicting habits - harmful or not. Smoking pot is probably not a very good idea at all. But your psych is a trained professional, so they should be able to help the most.
EvilSpork
...

Sam used to cut all the time... Sometimes up to 30 cuts at one time in all places on her body, and she told me she wished she could do more....

I don't really know what made her stop...

Urg bad memories.. Bad memories.....................
Jaq
I hate it when people trivialize this sort of thing by sighing or telling someone to snap out of it.
I've seen some good self injury websites who have suggestions on how to substitute self injury without hurting yourself badly. It really depends what you get the "pleasure" out of. If you like to see the blood then you can take a red marker and mark yourself where you usually cut yourself. If you burn yourself take an ice cube and hold it in your hand or where you usually burn yourself. If you hurt yourself for the pain you can put an elastic band around your wrist and snap it when you get stressed out. Another good one is to put a drop of hot sauce on your tongue.
I know that other people are telling you to exercise or paint instead of these things but you might not be at that stage in your recovery. You're probably just starting therapy and your psychiatrist/psychologist wants to keep you safe. He or she knows that you're still going to hurt yourself right now because that's your coping method and that you don't know any other way of coping right now. So by asking you to learn ways of giving yourself pain without hurting yourself s/he can keep you out of the psych ward (if they think a patient is a danger to themselves or others they will put you in the hospital) which I'm sure you definitely don't want. Once you learn other healthier coping methods (which takes some time) you can give these tricks up too.

Good luck. I hope that helped.
PsychWardMike
To Aria:

No where in this person's post did they say that they are clinically depressed. I know a lot of angsty teenagers that cut themselves and cry listending to Nirvana by candlelight. That's not clinical depression; that's angst for the sake of angst which can very easily be overcome. The advice that I gave is exactly what I did to get out of my own angst stages.

I do not trivialize clinical depression; I know plain and well that it's a disease (enough people in my family have it...) and that it needs to be dealt with. However, I have my doubts about a teenager named "cuttingallover" coming to a message board and, as their first post, talking about how they cut themselves. It doesn't seem the mark of most depressed people that I've met, but everyone's different.

However, I would be tempted to, if I didn't know better, say that this was almost an attempt at "attention whoring." That, of course, would be if I didn't know better, though.

As for this cutting person? I'm awaiting a response to any of our replies.
Aria
QUOTE (PsychWardMike @ Aug 29 2004, 06:34 PM)
To Aria:

No where in this person's post did they say that they are clinically depressed.  I know a lot of angsty teenagers that cut themselves and cry listending to Nirvana by candlelight.  That's not clinical depression; that's angst for the sake of angst which can very easily be overcome.  The advice that I gave is exactly what I did to get out of my own angst stages.

I do not trivialize clinical depression; I know plain and well that it's a disease (enough people in my family have it...) and that it needs to be dealt with.  However, I have my doubts about a teenager named "cuttingallover" coming to a message board and, as their first post, talking about how they cut themselves.  It doesn't seem the mark of most depressed people that I've met, but everyone's different.

However, I would be tempted to, if I didn't know better, say that this was almost an attempt at "attention whoring."  That, of course, would be if I didn't know better, though.

As for this cutting person?  I'm awaiting a response to any of our replies.
*


Neh. I would personally avoid trivializing depression or even 'angst'. You simply don't know this person's situation. Neither do I, but as such, I think it's better if you avoid treating as something you should snap out of. This person IS seeing a shrink, which generally indicates that there's something medically/physiologically wrong with him or her.

In any case, even if it were teenage angst, I still find it's better to treat their problems with the same seriousness as you would if it weren't. Sometimes, you just need people to listen, and care, rather than toss off advices, and sighs. Being tempted to write them off as attention whores, and saying so in the thread that they post is sort of wretched too, no offense. Sometimes, you do need to take things seriously, suspend disbelief, whatever-- because you *don't* know the person's situation. If you were their best friend, and saw this, and knew it wasn't true, sure... call them on it. Until you know, you should take people seriously.

And I'm not really sure this thread requires a response on this person's part. They asked for suggestions, they got them, it's all good.

Edit: if anyone, be it angsty teenager, or clinically depressed 50 year is old is cutting themselves, they need SOME form of help. Period. Being an angsty teenager shouldn't mean you can write off people cutting themselves.
PsychWardMike
So I suppose we're polar opposites.

Note: this has become an argument, not over this person in particular.

Angsty teenagers that cut themselves are seeking attention. They tell people they cut for some sort of shock value and the immediate attention they recieve thereafter. I have found that, of all the teenagers that cut themselves that I've met, about 1 in 15 actually had something wrong with them. The rest went along with it, after convincing themselves that they belong to a certain clique (goth/emo, most often) and proceed to do so for acceptance. It's not, for most cases that I've seen, a form or release, but a form of getting people to like them. That's not depression - it's just a case of an a teenager doing anything they can to get people to like them.
Aria
QUOTE (PsychWardMike @ Aug 29 2004, 07:20 PM)
So I suppose we're polar opposites.

Note:  this has become an argument, not over this person in particular.

Angsty teenagers that cut themselves are seeking attention.  They tell people they cut for some sort of shock value and the immediate attention they recieve thereafter.  I have found that, of all the teenagers that cut themselves that I've met, about 1 in 15 actually had something wrong with them.  The rest went along with it, after convincing themselves that they belong to a certain clique (goth/emo, most often) and proceed to do so for acceptance.  It's not, for most cases that I've seen, a form or release, but a form of getting people to like them.  That's not depression - it's just a case of an a teenager doing anything they can to get people to like them.
*



If they're cutting themselves for attention, they still need help. If they're cutting themselves to fit in, they need help. Period. Cutting yourself for any reason is unhealthy, and they either need help in being more assertive, and more comfortable with themselves, or they need help seeking attention in positive ways. They need help. Period. Cutting is NOT healthy.
PsychWardMike
No, they do not need help. They need maturity and an epiphany. That's all.
Mutilation
Listen to Radiohead, roll around on the floor and hit your head against a wooden plank. Seriously it helps.
Righteous
I'm not trivializing it; look at the scars on my arm. All I'm saying is that finding something to channel your energies keeps you from carving yourself up.

I will advise this: Don't substitute one bad habit for another. Don't drink massive amounts of alcohol and say it keeps you from cutting.

I never got help. I did get a major epiphany when Spiffy saw the scars on my arm and cried, though...
spiffilicious05
I've been through cutting and other methods of self inflicted pain myself. I know that it's hard to give up and it seems so insignificant when it comes to you doing it yourself rather than when one of your friends is doing. All I can tell you is to talk to some friends, have them help you with your problems. Go out with them, watch movies -- do something. Guy/girl hunting is always fun.

I know that helped me, along with my music. I learned how to play the guitar.
Phyllis
You know what is far more annoying than angsty teenage whining, Mike?

Other people constantly making a big deal about said angsty teenage whining. wink.gif You sure do whine quite a lot about other peoples' whining. Doesn't that seem a bit useless to you? It seems to be your own outlet for angst -- complaining about its existence in others. Heh. tongue.gif

Meanwhile, back on the actual topic, other people have given some good suggestions...and they are far more qualified to give advice on the subject, as I have never had to deal with self-injury issues myself.
PsychWardMike
dotdotdot.

I love the way you overlook the actual advice that I gave, but focus on the attitude. I don't like angst because I went through it myself and now see that it was a collossal waste of time; I get annoyed at people that come to message boards and cry about how they cut themselves. So yeah, I get annoyed, and yes I don't like teenage angst, but don't say that I didn't give some advice.

So yeah, don't like that I don't like angst? Tough. That's who I am. Just as I'm sure you're going to assert that it's the way you are and that cutting is is the way the other person is.

But whatever. My words will affect you as much as they'll affect cuttingallover - however much you let it. So how useless is it?
Dreams On Hiatus
I don't know what to say, because most of the advice given I would have given as well. Also - dunno if this would work for you but I'm trying to give you some advice (and I hope that the advice everyone gave you helps smile.gif) - take a notebook or something with blank pages in it and fill it with rants or instead of actually inflicting pain on yourself, write about inflicting pain on yourself. Only problem is if someone finds the book and then you might run into trouble there, so I don't know what to say. sad.gif Good luck.
Righteous
There's a big difference between angst and a serious problem. I've seen both. Cutting out of angst does require maturity and a little compassion. Then again, there are times where it takes a lot more than a great realization; they require help. There must be that moment where you decide that this kind of self-destruction isn't neccessary. You can't make someone get there; it has to happen and bickering like a pair of school children won't do a damn bit of good.
Snugglebum the Destroyer
QUOTE
I love the way you overlook the actual advice that I gave, but focus on the attitude. I don't like angst because I went through it myself and now see that it was a collossal waste of time;


It's easy to trivialise teenage angst when you've done it yourself, grown out of it and have the advantage of hindsight. I do exactly the same thing. However, if you try and remember what it was like at the time, how everything turned into a drama - how would you have liked people to have dealt with you?

I know for a fact that 'Pull yourself together' really would have been one of the worst things to say.

That and 'You'll grow out of it' (mainly because that one's true wink.gif )
Ashbless
I was just wondering if there is something that triggers the desire to reach for the sharp object?
When he/she is wanting to cut what thoughts are running through their head? I'm talking seriously and in no way sarcastic here. Maybe the person could take a pen and jot down everything they are thinking at that moment. It could help when they see how unreasonable some of the thoughts are.
I haven't had a cutting problem but some less than admirable behaviour on my part can be triggered off by the little self critical voice. The one that mutters that you'll never be well loved, never be smart enough. The one you have to realize is there and then to realize it's full of sh*t. Actively dragging those thoughts out onto a piece of paper is a good way to see how unreasonable and hurtful and outright wrong they are. They're like vampires and do die in the sunlight.
Jaq
QUOTE (Snugglebum the Destroyer @ Aug 30 2004, 09:07 PM)
QUOTE
I love the way you overlook the actual advice that I gave, but focus on the attitude. I don't like angst because I went through it myself and now see that it was a collossal waste of time;


It's easy to trivialise teenage angst when you've done it yourself, grown out of it and have the advantage of hindsight. I do exactly the same thing. However, if you try and remember what it was like at the time, how everything turned into a drama - how would you have liked people to have dealt with you?

I know for a fact that 'Pull yourself together' really would have been one of the worst things to say.

That and 'You'll grow out of it' (mainly because that one's true wink.gif )
*



Exactly. You think you can say it's _just_ teenage angst because you're not a teenager anymore or you've gotten over your teenage angst but you really don't know why this person cuts. It might be to fit in with a certain group. If it is then it still isn't healthy. Hurting yourself for the acceptance of others is still cause for concern. If it is "classic" self injury behavior where this person is hurting themselves as a form of coping with the stresses that they can't vocalize to their family or friends then maybe they can only talk about it with a group of faceless voiceless strangers on the internet and their psychiatrist.
Before you judge someone and their situation at least try to get a little bit of information about their situation.
vicrawr
Why is it that women always sound the smartest? Anywho, I agree with them. Snugglebum, Jenn, and Aria are right. I think.

I tried cutting once and it hurt! Whether you do it for the attention or the pain, it's still bad. Let's forget my low pain tolerance.
artist.unknown
Okay, I'm going to straddle the fence here. Like Mike, I've known people who simply use cutting as an attention-seeking behaviour, especially when the person wants the attention of a) an adult or b) someone of the opposite sex. It's still a problem, but it's one that the person needs to learn to grow out of.

However, I've seen the other side, too. My boyfriend is clinically depressed and while he doesn't necessarily "cut", he owns knives and swords and is deliberately careless or dangerous around them, to the effect that his hands and arms are constantly cut up. It's not angst, and it's not for attention (in fact, he normally hides the fact that he's cut himself because he doesn't want to upset me). Suicidal cutters normally do it because there are deeper, underlying problems. You can't just tell somebody like that to "snap out of it". Insensitivity only makes it worse. The best thing is to be there for them and be willing to listen. The best advice I can give is to find someone you trust and talk to them about it.
gothictheysay
Actually, Ashbless's advice is also doled out by professionals. Find out *why* you want the pain is an integral part of getting better. I also acknowledge the fact that there are a lot of people who do cut who are just trying to be "cool", and while that seems more minor, some help is usually needed, even if it's not much. However much gets them to stop. However, cutting can also be very serious. It's not harmless or stupid or easy to blow off - people go to extremes. I know people who have actually fainted from lack of blood from cutting, and people who have required stitches. It can be attention whoring, which is in some cases good - attention whoring enough for people to pay attention and get them to stop.
PsychWardMike
I've read this over the course of my psychological studies over the years (independent, readings of text books.)

If someone is truely suicidal, they would do it, not cut themselves. Cutting is a fleshwound; suicide is permanent. The angsty teenagers I speak of know the difference, as they are in complete control - I've yet to see someone who has been cutting for a long time (and for attention) be rash enough to commit suicide. But again - we DO NOT KNOW who this person is, their motives, or their style which means that EVERY WORD THAT WE SAY is speculation.
Snugglebum the Destroyer
QUOTE
But again - we DO NOT KNOW who this person is, their motives, or their style which means that EVERY WORD THAT WE SAY is speculation


Yes it is.

However, what we say or do really could spurn someone to go from harmless cutting (which in many cases it is) to actual fatal damage.

In many cases, suicide turns out to be accidental. A cry for help gone too far.

QUOTE
I've read this over the course of my psychological studies over the years (independent, readings of text books.)


And yet there is still no answer. If there was - no one would be suicidal. Neh?
gothictheysay
Well, yeah it's speculation, but everyone was obviously spoiling for a debate so here we are.

In my opinion, people who cut for attention aren't the suicidal type. Everyone defines suicidal differently - i.e. some people categorize it as the person having suicidal thoughts/ideations/plans, others don't think it's suicidal unless the person committed/tried to commit suicide. People who cut are usually not doing it to be suicidal unless they have cut extremely deeply - deep enough to kill - which won't really happen usually unless the person is intending to commit suicide. However, cutting or any other source of self-injury is self-destructive behavior, and if left alone there's the possibility that it could get worse and lead to more serious self-destructive behavior.
mothe
I share your pain. . . i just say because misery loves company. ..

Now I am your company.
spiffilicious05
QUOTE
Angsty teenagers that cut themselves are seeking attention.




My plan was never to go public with this because I hate people knowing about my problems - they're extremely personal and embarasing but enough is enough. I'm tired of hearing people saying cutting is just for attention. But, seeing as how Mike has been my last straw here:

No Mike, we are not all seeking attention. It's to create a pain to distract us from a greater pain. Like my ex boyfriend beating the shit out of me infront of my father and my father saying 'settle down.'

Like my ex not only using me after we broke up, but raping me - twice.

It's reasons like those that make people cut -- and it's people like you who make us want to turn back to cutting, because those statements make us feel worthless.
mothe
Spiff is right, people who haven't experianced it can't know why or what it feels like. It's hard to quit when it's the only way to help yourself. . . but if you really want to you can try. Just keep blades away from yourself,and keep yourself busy. focus on love, or school or something. That's what I do and it works fairly well. It might not stop it but it will help.
Jaq
I think you misunderstand the reasons that people cut Mike. They cut so they won't *have* to go any farther and think about commiting suicide. Do you think that SI is just failed suicide attempts? Because it's not. It's a really unhealthy coping technique for people who don't think that they have any other means of coping and in some cases have been proven right. That they don't. I know of very few cutters because very few of them are willing to admit that they do cut because it's such a personal and embarassing thing. If a person does admit that they cut, like Spiffy just did, (which took alot of courage Spiffy) they aren't doing it for attention they usually only admit it because they feel that they can trust the person they tell or like Spiffy did, to make a point to self important, arm chair psychiatrists like you. Congratulations Spiffy, I know that took balls.
Righteous
Define "truely suicidal." Mike. With a suicidal person there's the internal conflict of to die or to live and this internal conflict can cause massive amounts of emotional pain. Read Hamlet. Bill Shakespeare goes in depth. You can want to end it but have reasons not to. A lot of times, people wrought with that kind of self-hating often cut. Sometimes it's a means of self torture. Sometimes it's a cry for help. Sometimes it's a weird release. I know because it's been all three to me.

I agree that for a lot of people, it's rooted in angst and needs to be grown out of. But what happens when it's not just being a messed-up teenager? There are other factors, Mick. Try to put them into the equasion.
PsychWardMike
... I allotted for each case to be different - everyone is different and thus every story is different, however it has been my experience that a sickening majority of teenage cutting stems from a disillusioned state of mind because they have been efffectively brainwashed by Hot Topic and their peers.

As for Jaq - I was simply saying that a truly suicidal person will not go home, pop in a Nirvana/Linkin Park/Evanescence CD, light some candles, and cry while they cut themselves with tiny razor blades. That is attention whoring, whether they admit it or not.

And let me reiterate: my guess about this case is just as good as everyone else's. None of us have given any others reason to believe that they know him/her.

And now, for the coup de grace: DO NOT assume that I don't know what I"m talking about. I've been to the edge of angst and back - I know the territory and that's why I hate it. Don't call me a heartless bastard because you think I'm ignorant - call me a heartless bastard because I'm apathetic.
Jaq
QUOTE (PsychWardMike @ Aug 31 2004, 12:23 PM)
As for Jaq - I was simply saying that a truly suicidal person will not go home, pop in a Nirvana/Linkin Park/Evanescence CD, light some candles, and cry while they cut themselves with tiny razor blades. That is attention whoring, whether they admit it or not.
*



I don't know if you read my last post mike but as I said before most people who si are not making failed suicide attempts. THEY ARE NOT TRYING TO KILL THEMSELVES. (edit: sometimes si progresses to suicidal ideation where people who normally make small non life threatening cuts start making bigger deeper cuts as they find that the small ones don't "do the job" anymore) Rather they do it to avoid becoming suicidal and they use it as a coping mechanism. It is a form of release for them, much in the same way that crying or screaming is for other people. And how can it possibly attention whoring when people who cut usually go to great lengthes to hide their si habits from their family and friends?


btw If I went on an anorexia thread and told all the anorexics that "They should just eat a meal and stop making their parents worry because they're being ASW" then I would be flamed into oblivion. Don't be surprised that I'm reacting strongly to your self admitted ignorant, all encompassing (all of people who SI are ... no one who SI's is....) and rather insensitive opinions.
Mutilation
QUOTE (Jaq @ Aug 31 2004, 03:08 PM)
btw if you know nothing about this subject (as you admit in your last post)
*


QUOTE
DO NOT assume that I don't know what I"m talking about.


Buh?
Jaq
QUOTE (Mutilation @ Sep 1 2004, 12:28 AM)
QUOTE (Jaq @ Aug 31 2004, 03:08 PM)
btw if you know nothing about this subject (as you admit in your last post)
*


QUOTE
DO NOT assume that I don't know what I"m talking about.


Buh?
*




sorry, I got confused by his double negatives. don't use no double negatives!
spiffilicious05
QUOTE
And how can it possibly attention whoring when people who cut usually go to great lengthes to hide their si habits from their family and friends?


btw If I went on an anorexia thread and told all the anorexics that "They should just eat a meal and stop making their parents worry because they're being ASW" then I would be flamed into oblivion. Don't be surprised that I'm reacting strongly to your self admitted ignorant, all encompassing (all of people who SI are ... no one who SI's is....) and rather insensitive opinions.


here, here!

Thank god for level minded people. I'm so tired of the 'suck it up' theory. I'm not saying that some people don't do it for attention -- but don't make it out to be that all are.

I mean Jaq is right - why would people go to great lengths to hide their cuts if they wanted to seek attention? Cutting is an illness, like cancer or pneumonia -- it's not something you just get over. It takes time, and some people never fully recover.
froggle-rock
QUOTE
Righteous Posted Today, 02:32 AM

Sometimes it's a means of self torture. Sometimes it's a cry for help. Sometimes
it's a weird release.


an ex self harmed, and told me that it was the most intense and instantanious release she could, well express. and although I cannot relate to it exactly from personal experiance, I can see how as a form of release it makes sense. when she started self harming she dismissed to her family, her friends and myself, the cuts as scratches from her cat. a little while after se started to see a thearpist or psychilogist of some sort. it took a while for her family, and my self to realise the connection.

there may have been times when she cut superficialy for the sake of it, or she cut because her peers did (she was sectioned, and so 'lived' with other self harmers for quite a while), or for attention. I do strongly believe that alot of the time, when she cut and burnt was as a release. a release of all the messed up stuff in her head.

not everyone grows up and learns 'healthy' releases or mechanisms for dealing with the poopy side of life. Not every one grows up psychosis free.

I cannot promise that whatever's going on in your life, or head will go away, or magically stop just like that, to do that would be to lie. I have seen my ex learn to deal with the poopy bits that life thows at her. sure stuff gets her down, but she has learnt to ways that dont involve burning or cutting, or any ther manifestation of self harm, to deal.

I guess I should conclude by telling you how she release, or escapes nowadays, and I will. But first I want to say that whatever activity or the like, that you end up finding some solice in, make sure its your own, so that no one can take it away from you, so that it's there when you need it, and you dont fell guilty about hiding it from those around you, and I guess, that it makes you happy from a positive place inside, not a negative place.

Well, my ex: paints; play's guitar; swings poi (balls on string); twirls staff; goes to metal clubs and moshes like its 1999; hits the wall some times (not that I advocate it, as its still a form of self harm, even if the concious intention it to crumble concreate).

I hope you find the release that is you.
Phyllis
Like Jaq said...most people who SI hide it from family and friends, but they do tend to be a little more open about it on the Internet because it's anonymous. I can definitely relate to that. No one who knows me in real life, except my husband, knows that I used to be bulimic...but many people online do because it's just easier to talk about your problems when it's *relatively* anonymous.

Mike...your willingness to dismiss any angst that is made public as simply attention whoring disturbs me. I find it very hard to dismiss anyone's cries for help, simply because I have no way of knowing their full situation. Even if it is just attention whoring, there is likely some other problem below the surface...something that is making them feel like they need this attention. I'd rather try to help someone (without criticizing them, yes I know you did offer advice...but nearly in the same breath that you basically called them an attention whore) even if they didn't need it, rather than risk dismissing someone who really *did* need help because I went through angst and thought because I was a whiny teenager with no real problems, everyone else must be as well.
gothictheysay
One main reason it's hard to just *stop* is because for many people it becomes an addiction - not a physical one, but a psychological one. I've heard it compared and have thought about it myself...it can almost be a drug in some ways, if not just like one. A lot of people get adrenaline rush from it. Drugs in general are another different matter entirely, but both can be used as coping skills (though they are considered poor choices) and they can easily become habit-forming.
PsychWardMike
Crying for help is just that - screaming into the darkness. One must help one's self.
Snugglebum the Destroyer
QUOTE
Crying for help is just that - screaming into the darkness. One must help one's self.


I agree with you wholeheartedly - I really do.

Unfortunatly, you just don't understand that when you're young. (that's not a slight on anyone here - just an old woman thing wink.gif )
Aria
QUOTE (PsychWardMike @ Aug 31 2004, 10:44 PM)
Crying for help is just that - screaming into the darkness.  One must help one's self.
*



One can also be helped by others. Sheesh. What do you think shrinks are for? Sometimes, you CAN'T help yourself. It's no weakness to get help. It's no weakness to need help, either.
Righteous
Other people's help can go only so far. No matter how much my family helped, unless I wanted to, they couldn't make me not cut my arm and face or drink or induce vomiting or burn myself or strike myself or anything of that nature. Screaming at someone to stop until you're blue in the face is pointless unless the person wants help.
Aria
QUOTE (Righteous @ Sep 1 2004, 04:53 AM)
Other people's help can go only so far. [...] Screaming at someone to stop until you're blue in the face is pointless unless the person wants help.
*



True. Although, in a situation like this one (going back to the start of the thread) considering that the person is seeing a shrink and asking for help on a message board, I think we can assume that the person wants help. And if people need help, it's there and they should take advantage of it.
Pab
psickwodmick: your relentless agression towards all exterior signs of fragility in other people are totally transparent as being your own 'individual' way of coping with your own little issues of angstyness.

As you are generally insulting and seem to snipe at victims as if this were a video game, I thought I'd mention it, just so you understand that people realise that you are saying more about yourself than about the people you try to pick out on here.

How old are you then?
This is a "lo-fi" version of our main content. To view the full version with more information, formatting and images, please click here.